Biblically, repentance (confession of wrong) and forgiveness are two sides of the same coin for the purpose of reconciling a relationship.
If neither or only one of these things happens, then there is no reconciling of the relationship. We do not hate those who have wronged us, and when having to be in their presence, we show the respect that was not shown to us, but this is not reconciliation; it is just Christian graciousness. However, we cannot be friends with those who cannot be trusted because they thought it was alright ot offend.
Modern Christianity is burdening those who were innocent to forgive when the offender is not sorry. But I don't see them chastising the offender to repent. This is the opposite of what God teaches in His Word.
Luke 17:3-4 "3Watch yourselves. If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. 4Even if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times returns to say, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”
Notice the words "if he comes and says I repent." Why is this always left out of the admonishment to forgive offenders?
God has a reason for His commands on how and when to forgive. When we follow humanistic psychology, we enable people, and even encourage them to sin for lack of chastisement. The innocent one gets pressured to forgive while the perp is let off the hook for his sin. This is backward from God's order and purpose.
Let's be diligent to do things God's way so that people learn to be repentant.
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