Thursday, November 19, 2015

Commanding Others to do Things Our Own Way

I have to laugh when I see people posting placards that command us to respond and share as if it were a demonstration of our allegiance to them. I see this nearly every day. What happens to me when I see it is the compulsion to deliberately not respond or share. Anyone can "like" and "repost" while meaning none of it, just to fit in, doing so doesn't mean we live what we expressed.

When we use intimidation to cause people to do what we want them to do to feel in control or elevated in the eyes of others, we have demonstrated a lack of love.

Love shares opinions, views and truth without any conditions placed on the reader. God can take something anywhere He wants it to go without our intimidation. It is not our job to coerce others to think as we do or to do as we do. We can have faith that God will work on hearts, His way without us! Unless of course they are delivering heresy or a false gospel then we have a responsibility to remove ourselves.

Intimidation and manipulation to get what we want, even if it's a good thing, is not love, but selfishness coupled with lack of faith. It is also one of the elements of narcissism, when we can't find love for someone unless they do things our way, even then it isn't God's love because we would love and appreciate others even when they don't see things exactly our way.

I attended a Pentecostal gathering once, where I was standing by myself pondering something in my heart. A man walked up to me introduced himself and then told me I should smile, "if you are a Christian" you should be happy." Sadly, this man assumed I was unhappy because I was not wildly smiling as he was. He associated the joy of the Lord with a continual plastic smile to show off to others.
 
I asked him, "Why do you want me to smile?" He continued to act in animated fashion, while sharing that if we have the joy of the Lord we will be smiling. I asked for scripture to support his view and he suddenly had something else to do, bounding off, smiling at everyone passing by to demonstrate his joy. He made a false judgment that I was not spiritual because I was not smiling while attempting to cause bad feelings of failure in me for not doing as he did.

The situation would have been comical if it were not so sad. The purpose of the encounter was not for the man to encourage me to have joy, I already had that, rather the purpose was to cause others in the gathering to focus on him, he worked to manufacture a false superficial and self-elevating persona of joy.

God never told us to "smile", in fact just the opposite will occur when we walk closely with Christ.

Ecclesiastes 1:18 "Because in much wisdom there is much grief, and increasing knowledge results in increasing pain."

God never told us to be happy, everywhere we see the word "happy" in the modern versions, the original uses a word for "blessed." Being blessed is far different from happiness. Happiness is more associated with feelings based on circumstances rather than the ever present joy a believer has even in times of trial.

James 1:2-8
"2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,
3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.
4 And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
5 But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him.
6 But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind.
7 For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord, 8 being a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways."

The word "happy" came from the 1300's meaning "happenstance", referring to "good fortune." This word is based on circumstances and feelings, not on peace or joy that comes from deep within the soul.
The word "happy" has replaced the word "blessed" in the modern translation.
Proverbs 3:13 "Happy [is] the man [that] findeth wisdom, and the man [that] getteth understanding." KJV
Proverbs 3:13 "How blessed is the man who finds wisdom And the man who gains understanding." NASB


The Word blessed in the Greek means: adulation, praise, blessing, gift.

What I notice about this is that happiness is based on feelings, while blessing is based on an inner soul experience that resides even when there is sadness, trials or intense difficulty.

That's why God says; ""2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance."
Joy is based on a steadfast assurance of God's protection for our soul even while we are being tortured, beheaded or in our culture, merely the maligning of our character when it is undeserved.
We should not be seeking to be happy or feeling less spiritual when we are sad. Focusing on superficial emotions and even judging others who don't have a show of intense adulation, is someone who is entrenched in a worldly view of life.


There are many times I feel happiness and laugh at something amusing, but that is not an indication of my spirituality. An indication that we possess the joy of the Lord is our response to all aspects of life even hardship.

It is not love to pressure someone to smile when they are experiencing hardship, it is sin to judge someone as lacking joy just because their outer appearance is not what we think it ought to be.
Love of the brethren is caring enough to ask what someone is experiencing to be able to help them, or join in their joy. Assuming things without understanding of the details is arrogant. Believing we know the plight of someone by mere superficial observance is to act like God, knowing all things without having to engage with those we judge.


Romans 12:15 "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep."

Love does not seek to elevate self through phony appearances, but rather seeks to know the brethren at the deepest level.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 "4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant,
5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,
6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;
7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away."


1 John 3:14 "We know that we have passed out of death into life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love abides in death."

Romans 12:10 "Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor;"

We must remember too, that we can never make a proper judgment of another human being merely from the testimony of others. Often triangulation is going on, especially in families. Triangulation is the practice of repeating matters we have heard, while acting toward the victim as though what we heard was absolutely true.
 
Even when we have observed something someone has done, we cannot judge it without first speaking to the person and listening to all the details. Gossip is when we pass on information when we don't know all the details.

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