So often we see wicked people and wonder why they think the way they do. Partly it is their flesh, the are responding to feelings and desires without concern about others.
However, I have seen people respond and act in ways that make no sense at all, even using "word salad" to justify themselves. I believe these instances are the influence of demonic patterns as the devil works in the minds of people.
Have you ever sat at your desk or on your couch and all of a sudden for no reason you begin to feel slightly fearful or sad, when nothing has happened? This has happened to me, I would begin to pray and the feelings lifted, returning me to a sense of joy and calm.
When someone is not walking with Christ, their feelings rule their life. If they "feel" bad momentarily, they must assign that bad feeling to someone else or something else, even though those things or people had nothing to do with the feelings.
Notice too that we have a rise in people on depression meds, teen suicides and man more seemingly irrational actions over the smallest matters. I am convinced these are demonically inspired feelings and thoughts to cause people to sin.
1 Peter 5:8 "Be sober, be vigilant, because your adversary the devil walketh about as a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour."
We are living in the end times when there is precious little righteousness in the world and far more people given to following their feelings rather than rational thinking.
When we understand this we don't have to be drawn in, we can fight the feelings with prayer as we learn how to respond to the attacks God's way. The most important thing to remember when we are drawn into drama, is that our conscience is far more important than winning or revenge.
Romans 12:19 "19 Do not avenge yourselves, beloved, but leave room for God’s wrath. For it is written: “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”
We don't have to train others, we can leave it to God, He really does have this, even without our help.
Tuesday, April 3, 2018
Projection of the Narcissist!
When a narcissist shouts "you think your better", what they are really saying is "I think your better."
When a narcissists shouts, "you hate me", they are saying "I hate you."
When a narcissists says "you won't listen", they are saying "I am not going to listen to you."
When a narcissist says to you, "your judgmental", they are really saying "I judge people all the time. "
Narcissists accuse others of what the narcissist is and those they accuse are not, for the purpose of frustrating those they accuse. They want to cause you to react in an ungodly way so they can bring you to a place in which you sin.
It is a natural human response to defend ourselves and even feel angry when we are accused of something that is not true. If we are walking in the Spirit we will recognize these tactics and refuse to allow our emotions to rule us. This is what the devil wants, using a person to poke and prod at us until something ungodly emerges.
We see this all the time in family dynamics, the narcissist will attempt to drag you into conflict by accusing you of things that are not true. If they can get you to respond badly in anger they have proven, in their mind, that you are bad after all.
God tells us not to engage with fools whose only purpose is to bring out the worst in you, those who love it when you fail God, will not stop until you have blown up or spoken rashly.
1 Peter 5:8-9 " 8 Be sober-minded and alert. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in your faith and in the knowledge that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of suffering.…"
These verses are telling us to resist the devil, not the person. The devil will use the person to cause fights and arguments, when we resist the devil we will not allow the person to push our buttons that cause the fighting. Our tactics of warfare are prayer and leaving the presence of those who attempt to engage us in sin.
When a narcissists shouts, "you hate me", they are saying "I hate you."
When a narcissists says "you won't listen", they are saying "I am not going to listen to you."
When a narcissist says to you, "your judgmental", they are really saying "I judge people all the time. "
Narcissists accuse others of what the narcissist is and those they accuse are not, for the purpose of frustrating those they accuse. They want to cause you to react in an ungodly way so they can bring you to a place in which you sin.
It is a natural human response to defend ourselves and even feel angry when we are accused of something that is not true. If we are walking in the Spirit we will recognize these tactics and refuse to allow our emotions to rule us. This is what the devil wants, using a person to poke and prod at us until something ungodly emerges.
We see this all the time in family dynamics, the narcissist will attempt to drag you into conflict by accusing you of things that are not true. If they can get you to respond badly in anger they have proven, in their mind, that you are bad after all.
God tells us not to engage with fools whose only purpose is to bring out the worst in you, those who love it when you fail God, will not stop until you have blown up or spoken rashly.
1 Peter 5:8-9 " 8 Be sober-minded and alert. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in your faith and in the knowledge that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of suffering.…"
These verses are telling us to resist the devil, not the person. The devil will use the person to cause fights and arguments, when we resist the devil we will not allow the person to push our buttons that cause the fighting. Our tactics of warfare are prayer and leaving the presence of those who attempt to engage us in sin.
Cognitive Dissonance the Elephant in the Room
"Cognitive dissonance" a term I heard recently that spurred some thoughts in me about the condition of the apostate church as well as my past experience in family gatherings.
The term describes someone acting in a way that is not consistent with their own moral code or beliefs.
I never heard the term until recently in connection with narcissism.
Sometimes when we are intimidated by others, desiring to be accepted by them, we begin to take on their ways and their thinking even though we don't really believe that way.
How often have we found ourselves being manipulated to remain silent or agree with people we know will become agitated or will not like us unless we agree with them?
In the past when I was much younger I withheld my true belief in family gatherings just to avoid the anger that I believed would ensue if I dared to disagree with the group think.
The more I allowed others to dictate the conversation, only those who agreed were allowed to speak their mind, then there would be no trouble. As soon as someone would disagree there would be rage and hatred emerging to intimidate the odd man out to remain silent or agree.
When we obey God we will not be allowing the fool to manipulate our actions or reactions. If we are controlled by the Spirit we will respond in the opposite ways that the narcissist wants us to respond.
The tactics of the fool as described in the Bible:
Proverbs 18:2
A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.
Proverbs 29:11
A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.
Proverbs 1:7
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.
Proverbs 18:6
A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating.
Proverbs 29:9
If a wise man has an argument with a fool, the fool only rages and laughs, and there is no quiet.
Our reactions to the fool that honor God as we are controlled by the Holy Spirit.
Proverbs 26:4-5
"4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
Or you will also be like him.
5 Answer a fool as his folly deserves,
That he not be wise in his own eyes."
The two verses in Proverbs seem to be contradictory, but they are not. Often we do best to refuse to engage in discourse with a fool knowing that he is attempting to cause trouble. However, there are times when we expose the tactics of the fool to show them their foolishness. Each action must be led by the Holy Spirit.
Being drawn into a conversation with someone whose only purpose is to cause a fight, would be foolish of us. When the fool is merely trying to win in an argument, we might point out their purpose and the silliness of their argument and then walk away from them. God will know which and when.
The term describes someone acting in a way that is not consistent with their own moral code or beliefs.
I never heard the term until recently in connection with narcissism.
Sometimes when we are intimidated by others, desiring to be accepted by them, we begin to take on their ways and their thinking even though we don't really believe that way.
How often have we found ourselves being manipulated to remain silent or agree with people we know will become agitated or will not like us unless we agree with them?
In the past when I was much younger I withheld my true belief in family gatherings just to avoid the anger that I believed would ensue if I dared to disagree with the group think.
The more I allowed others to dictate the conversation, only those who agreed were allowed to speak their mind, then there would be no trouble. As soon as someone would disagree there would be rage and hatred emerging to intimidate the odd man out to remain silent or agree.
When we obey God we will not be allowing the fool to manipulate our actions or reactions. If we are controlled by the Spirit we will respond in the opposite ways that the narcissist wants us to respond.
The tactics of the fool as described in the Bible:
Proverbs 18:2
A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion.
Proverbs 29:11
A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back.
Proverbs 1:7
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.
Proverbs 18:6
A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating.
Proverbs 29:9
If a wise man has an argument with a fool, the fool only rages and laughs, and there is no quiet.
Our reactions to the fool that honor God as we are controlled by the Holy Spirit.
Proverbs 26:4-5
"4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
Or you will also be like him.
5 Answer a fool as his folly deserves,
That he not be wise in his own eyes."
The two verses in Proverbs seem to be contradictory, but they are not. Often we do best to refuse to engage in discourse with a fool knowing that he is attempting to cause trouble. However, there are times when we expose the tactics of the fool to show them their foolishness. Each action must be led by the Holy Spirit.
Being drawn into a conversation with someone whose only purpose is to cause a fight, would be foolish of us. When the fool is merely trying to win in an argument, we might point out their purpose and the silliness of their argument and then walk away from them. God will know which and when.
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