In conversation with a family member many years ago he bragged about counseling a new believer who was living with an unsaved husband.
I was astonished what he told her. He told her to watch pornography with her husband because she should obey her husband in all things.
Objecting to this foolish advice I was labeled a "rebellious woman." That assessment of me was passed around in the family without any explanation as to why I was rebellious.
It was clear to me that the advice was based on the desire of Christian men to control their wives. Rather than lead them by example and loving behavior they felt the need to oppress and demean any woman who would dare to think for themselves in spiritual matters.
I wondered since then if a woman committed murder because her husband told her to do so, if the family member would think that was alright to murder.
After all, what is the difference between looking at porn to please her husband or murder to please her husband. In both cases God is dishonored and mocked.
I have no tolerance for men who treat their wives like objects to be used and abused, nor do I have tolerance for men who think all women ought to obey all men. The Bible does not teach this, but the Qur'an does.
Ephesians 5:22 "22 Wives, obey your husbands as you obey the Lord."
We obey our husbands when they obey God.
Acts 5:29
"29 Then Peter and the other apostles answered and said, We ought to obey God rather than men."
The apostles knew that obedience to God is first!
This same family member even told me he wondered if "Allah" was the same god as the Christian God. I flatly told him "of course not" and again was labeled rebellious because I would not go along with his idea of Christianity.
These were two very big clues that this family member was not walking with God or he would have known better.
When a narcissist does not like correction from someone they will declare something bad about that person, a character flaw without any details as to why they think this character flaw exists. Those who trust the narcissist will believe them, taking on the same arrogant and dismissive attitude as the narcissist without knowing why.
Narcissists speak in generalities to convince others to dislike their target. They will say "she is rebellious" or "she is mean" even "she is not too smart", causing questions in the mind of the hearer. After all the hearer thinks, "this person must know what they are talking about, they know her and I don't."
When you have someone like this in your family circle it will be hard to undo the damage they have done. Those who heard the vague platitudes against the target will retain that message in their minds while avoiding the target, never to find out the truth.
There is only two courses of action for the target to take, first pray for God's justice and secondly remove ourselves from the liar and the flying monkeys, that is all the people who have chosen to believe the narcissist.
Be satisfied in moving on with your life and the possibility that no one will ever find out the truth this side of heaven. God has this, we have no need to figure it out or work to save it.
Thankfully God said this:
Matthew 12:46-50
Changed Relationships
"46 While He was still speaking to the crowds, behold, His mother and brothers were standing outside, seeking to speak to Him. 47 Someone said to Him, “Behold, Your mother and Your brothers are standing outside seeking to speak to You.” 48 But Jesus answered the one who was telling Him and said, “Who is My mother and who are My brothers?” 49 And stretching out His hand toward His disciples, He said, “Behold My mother and My brothers! 50 For whoever does the will of My Father who is in heaven, he is My brother and sister and mother.”"
I am flaberghasted at the adults in politics that act like spoiled six year olds having a tantrum, its positively astonishing.
The world is filled right now with more "snowflakes" than rational, reasonable adults. Snow flakes being those that melt into an emotional heap when challenged that they might be wrong or under any pressure to adhere to correction.
Can anyone else relate to my astonishment? Sadly the next generation is growing up to think this is normal.
YIKES!!!!!!
Its time I said something that has been on my heart for awhile now.
I am blessed so often on facebook by those who are walking the same road with me, who understand the same things I do from God's principles. I am also blessed by the views here on this blog. Whenever I see that another person has viewed it I am blessed and encouraged.
It is such a joy to meet those here who share the same values, have had similar experiences and who know the right way to go and the right things to do.
It is also wonderful when we can share things to learn from one another. I have gained much from my facebook friends.
Just a little note to express my joy that you are my friends.
Proverbs 18:24 "24 A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who stays closer than a brother."
When I see someone who has recently joined a church but seems deadpan, without enthusiasm especially a new believer, I have to wonder if they were ever born again.
There is a joy and excitement over our new creation when we have been changed by Christ. If someone does not change at all, even remaining sullen, then I have to believe Christ never came to live in them. There are also those who are in the church many years who remain arrogant, pious and joyless.
I also wonder about those who become more rude and demanding about particular rules that man has placed on them. They have joined a club with man made rules but there is no sense of the Holy Spirit that convicts of sin or great joy of what they have been saved from, that is their sin and hell.
Another phenomena I have seen is the excuse making that many pretenders do, claiming that they are under grace so it doesn't matter how they live. Anyone who wants to remain sinful has not been born again. When Christ changes us into a new creation we develop a hatred for sin, even if we sin it feels ugly and we want victory over it.
In fact when some people have been in the church many years but are embarrassed at the mention of Christ's name there is something amiss. Many of these people don't believe they have sinned badly enough to go to hell. They are missing the point, that is even the slightest sin of lying, gossiping or indifference to God's commands are enough to keep one out of heaven.
When we become born again we are different, excited for our new freedom and joy. When this is absent I am suspicious. Born again believers know that they are sinful and it is only Christ's blood that covers our sinfulness. It is Christ who must cleanse us from our sin, this cleansing continues for the rest of our life as long as we are on this earth.
We are cleansed in direct proportion to how often we confess sin. If we do not confess sin we do not grow in holiness. Every sin we commit as a believer,. if not confessed will lose us rewards in heaven and lost blessing on this earth.
Hebrews 12:5-7 "…5 And you have forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons: “My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, or lose heart when He rebukes you. 6 For the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and He chastises everyone He receives as a son.” 7 Endure suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?…"
Many born again believers remain spiritual babies all their lives because of their inability to own their sin and confess it. It must be confessed to be cleansed and for growth to occur.
1 John 1:9 "1
"9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
There are many baby believers in the church and many pretenders, they look very similar, it is difficult to tell them apart. It is important that each born again believer evaluate their own life to judge if they are in obedience. It is the pretenders responsibility to ask themselves if they were ever born again and make a choice, either to become so or leave the church.
Matthew 13:24-30
Tares among Wheat
"24 Jesus presented another parable to them, saying, “The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a man who sowed good seed in his field.
25 But while his men were sleeping, his enemy came and sowed tares among the wheat, and went away.
26 But when the wheat sprouted and bore grain, then the tares became evident also.
27 The slaves of the landowner came and said to him, ‘Sir, did you not sow good seed in your field? How then does it have tares?’
28 And he said to them, ‘An enemy has done this!’ The slaves *said to him, ‘Do you want us, then, to go and gather them up?’ 29 But he *said, ‘No; for while you are gathering up the tares, you may uproot the wheat with them.
30 Allow both to grow together until the harvest; and in the time of the harvest I will say to the reapers, “First gather up the tares and bind them in bundles to burn them up; but gather the wheat into my barn.""
