Sunday, July 2, 2023
Narcissists Use People and Love Things and Activities
Things and activities are the focus of narcissists. They have no use for people except how they enhance the narcissist's materialistic prosperity and activity.
The foundation of the attitude of our country is pleasure and self-advancement.
God has given us prosperity as a nation and we think it was because His favor has been on us when perhaps He was testing our heart through our response to wealth.
When they speak of being blessed they name their status in life and their wealth, nothing about having grown emotionally and spiritually by the trials of life that God gave them to become holy. Never, Never, Never, do I hear talk like this to describe blessings.
We have another problem with the "prosperity preachers" causing people to think they have not been blessed if they are not wealthy. These preachers are spreading the doctrines of demons to distract the people and appeal to their baser nature of pleasure and pride which destroys those who are captive to it.
Judging someone based on their material wealth or physical health is demonic and misleading, not to mention a distraction from holiness.
Someone I was speaking to recently who is dedicated to personal wealth as a blessing doctrine, was astonished when I said; "God disciplines those whom He loves" and "if you are not disciplined by God you are illegitimate children."
Hebrews 12:5-7 "…5 And you have forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons: “My son, do not take lightly the discipline of the Lord, and do not lose heart when He rebukes you. 6 For the Lord disciplines the one He loves, and He chastises every son He receives.” 7Endure suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?"
Hebrews 12:8-9 "8 If you do not experience discipline like everyone else, then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. 9 Furthermore, we have all had earthly fathers who disciplined us, and we respected them. Should we not much more submit to the Father of our spirits and live?"
Trials of life are God's blessing for born-again believers, we learn from them and become stronger and less likely to be worldly-minded.
Sort of like a weight-lifter who has to tear his muscles so that when they heal they grow back stronger. Or the man in boot camp in the military who is pushed to the limit in his stressful training to make him strong, we are soldiers in God's army, we need the stresses and trials to build us stronger to be able to continue the battle.
James 1:2-4 "2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, when you encounter trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4Allow perseverance to finish its work, so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.…"
If someone has remained spiritual and emotional babies their entire lives they are either lazy Christians or were never born again. If they have no fruit of the Spirit they could not have been changed into a new creation or there would be some fruit. This fruit has nothing to do with good deeds, it is about their character in Christ. Their character does produce deeds but good deeds alone do not prove there is fruit.
Many unbelievers do good deeds, these deeds are not evidence that they will go to heaven or that their spirit has been changed into a new creation.
All good deeds coming from unregenerate people are tainted with self-exaltation and praise from others. Or, perhaps it is enough for unsaved people to feel good about themselves for their good deeds and they don't mention they have done them. Either way, the motives are self.
Galatians 5:22-23
"22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law."
Matthew 6:1“Be careful not to perform your righteous acts before men to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. 2 So when you give to the needy, do not sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their full reward. 3 But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,"
Matthew 6:5
And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their full reward.
Matthew 6:16
When you fast, do not be somber like the hypocrites, for they disfigure their faces to show men they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they already have their full reward.
Matthew 23:5
"All their deeds are done for men to see. They broaden their phylacteries and lengthen their tassels."
Luke 6:24
"But woe to you who are rich, for you have already received your comfort."
1 Corinthians 13:3
If I give all I possess to the poor and exult in the surrender of my body, but have not love, I gain nothing."
Good deeds and even good words only mean something when they are given selflessly, without any expectation, and without strings attached.
I remember gifts I have received over the years when those giving them to me told me their expectation on how to use those gifts. Then if I forgot and used them another way there were remarks in gossip against me to others about what I had done with their gifts.
Gifts like this were not real gifts they were burdens. I have a few stories like this and dreaded any gift coming from these same people.
One time one of the people gave me the gift of an antique chair. I was excited to receive it until the other shoe was dropped. This person told me I couldn't change the chair in any way. It had a very bad recovering job on it and needed new padding and upholstery which I was planning on doing until I was told I had to use it the way they wanted and could not change it.
I politely declined the gift and told the person; "I have a bad memory, I might forget and do something new to the chair, I wouldn't want to offend you."
I have recovered things in the past and painted many things over the years, I suspect this person who had recovered the chair themselves wanted me to see their handiwork every time I looked at the chair so the chair was more of a "look at me" thing than a gift.
The person saw that I was not going to take the chair with strings attached so they relented and said "do what you like with it" and offered me the chair again. I took the chair this time but still had the sense of strings with this person knowing their first desire.
The point of the story is that many people have a superficial understanding of the Bible much of which is based on their culture but not on the Bible's principles of Christ.
Most people make bad judgments about things they believe they know about but in reality, have little if any information. They fly by their feelings about someone instead of facts they have seen for themselves. They will believe something about someone without a good amount of knowledge about them merely because of how they feel about them.
Since narcissists, our culture as a whole, are things and activity oriented they will often disregard the needs of others and use them the same way they would use an object. They are "objectified" rather than loved.
The narcissist loves things and activities and uses people. God's way is the opposite, we love people and use things.
It really shouldn't be any wonder why our country is becoming more evil with every passing day. Evil grows when there is no love or when love God's way is perverted or misunderstood.
May those who love the Lord reject the worlds kind of love and become Christ-like as we resist the temptation to be like those around us.
1 John 2:14-16 "14 I have written to you, fathers, because you know Him who is from the beginning. I have written to you, young men, because you are strong, and the word of God abides in you, and you have overcome the evil one. 15 Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh, the desires of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not from the Father but from the world.…"
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