When we know our only job is to obey and that Christ is the One Who brings the increase, then we can lay down our expectations about results.
Monday, June 4, 2018
Time Out is Child Abuse
Did you know that sending children to "time out" is child abuse? Yep, that's what I said!
When we isolate another human being as unworthy to be with us we are telling them that we do not want them around us. They do not measure up to our expectations so they must be excluded.
It is also laziness, if is easier to put them in a room and walk away than it is to carry out the hard work of spanking and training.
One of the cruelest actions toward another human being is to "delete" them rather than working with them to correct the problem.
Proverbs 13:24 "24 He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently."
Isolation and exclusion is for those who are adults who are sinning and refusing to repent. This form of punishment is not for children who need the presence of family continually.
God said we are to spank the children who disobey, then they may resume with the family immediately after the correction.
Children know the difference between a spanking to correct behavior and isolation to reject. Rejection is not the aim of the Lord Jesus Christ in the discipline of children. Correction and redirection is the aim.
Those who use the silent treatment to intimidate others into submission are using their power to deliberately manipulate those they wish to control. There is no love in this form of penalty that is rejection for the young child.
The practice of cliques within the church system works the same way as time out for a young child. Rejection is for the purpose of demeaning, showing the isolated person they are not loved, wanted or worthy of attention.
God told us to go to the one who has offended us to seek sorrow over the offense. Once the offender has confessed and feels remorse, then the offended forgives and the relationship becomes even stronger as the two people involved are reconciled.
When an offense is ignored, hoping it will just go away so everyone can feel better, nothing is resolved, there is always a little screen of doubt between us and the one who didn't seem to care that they were offensive.
Politeness just to get things over with without a sense of resolution leaves the relationship barely superficial, lacking in depth and commitment. This relationship cannot survive anything new that may come up, because the past looms large over the present until it is resolved.
When the sewer overflows in the house during a flood the mounds of human waste can be removed but until the walls are replaced the stink remains.
Child rearing is for the purpose of training and teaching the principles of God to the child, through example as well as words. The example, the actions, of good communication far out way anything commanded toward the child.
When we send a message that "we want you to come to the party so you can see us ignoring you", we have communicated a contempt for the child.
Yes, I said it and believe it, isolation is cruel and much less productive in training a child than spanking. God told us how to handle disobedience of young children, any other way is disobedience toward God and allegiance toward secular psychology.
Hebrews 12:11
"For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."
Proverbs 23:13-15
"Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol. My son, if your heart is wise, my heart too will be glad."
Ephesians 6:4
"Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."
There are many very angry undisciplined children who just want parents who will be parents. They want protectors and guides to bring them safety through continual proper interaction.
Sadly there are those who try to use the Biblical discipline but are thwarted at every turn by extended family and even spouses. When this occurs, the children will follow the disobedient parent rather than the godly one.
Proverbs 29:15
"The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother."
Get that? "a child left to himself brings shame to his mother." That's interesting isn't it! It is the mother who suffers the most when the rebellious children learn to disrespect her authority.
Perhaps you might have some reason why this might be so?
When we isolate another human being as unworthy to be with us we are telling them that we do not want them around us. They do not measure up to our expectations so they must be excluded.
It is also laziness, if is easier to put them in a room and walk away than it is to carry out the hard work of spanking and training.
One of the cruelest actions toward another human being is to "delete" them rather than working with them to correct the problem.
Proverbs 13:24 "24 He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently."
Isolation and exclusion is for those who are adults who are sinning and refusing to repent. This form of punishment is not for children who need the presence of family continually.
God said we are to spank the children who disobey, then they may resume with the family immediately after the correction.
Children know the difference between a spanking to correct behavior and isolation to reject. Rejection is not the aim of the Lord Jesus Christ in the discipline of children. Correction and redirection is the aim.
Those who use the silent treatment to intimidate others into submission are using their power to deliberately manipulate those they wish to control. There is no love in this form of penalty that is rejection for the young child.
The practice of cliques within the church system works the same way as time out for a young child. Rejection is for the purpose of demeaning, showing the isolated person they are not loved, wanted or worthy of attention.
God told us to go to the one who has offended us to seek sorrow over the offense. Once the offender has confessed and feels remorse, then the offended forgives and the relationship becomes even stronger as the two people involved are reconciled.
When an offense is ignored, hoping it will just go away so everyone can feel better, nothing is resolved, there is always a little screen of doubt between us and the one who didn't seem to care that they were offensive.
Politeness just to get things over with without a sense of resolution leaves the relationship barely superficial, lacking in depth and commitment. This relationship cannot survive anything new that may come up, because the past looms large over the present until it is resolved.
When the sewer overflows in the house during a flood the mounds of human waste can be removed but until the walls are replaced the stink remains.
Child rearing is for the purpose of training and teaching the principles of God to the child, through example as well as words. The example, the actions, of good communication far out way anything commanded toward the child.
When we send a message that "we want you to come to the party so you can see us ignoring you", we have communicated a contempt for the child.
Yes, I said it and believe it, isolation is cruel and much less productive in training a child than spanking. God told us how to handle disobedience of young children, any other way is disobedience toward God and allegiance toward secular psychology.
Hebrews 12:11
"For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it."
Proverbs 23:13-15
"Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you strike him with a rod, he will not die. If you strike him with the rod, you will save his soul from Sheol. My son, if your heart is wise, my heart too will be glad."
Ephesians 6:4
"Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord."
There are many very angry undisciplined children who just want parents who will be parents. They want protectors and guides to bring them safety through continual proper interaction.
Sadly there are those who try to use the Biblical discipline but are thwarted at every turn by extended family and even spouses. When this occurs, the children will follow the disobedient parent rather than the godly one.
Proverbs 29:15
"The rod and reproof give wisdom, but a child left to himself brings shame to his mother."
Get that? "a child left to himself brings shame to his mother." That's interesting isn't it! It is the mother who suffers the most when the rebellious children learn to disrespect her authority.
Perhaps you might have some reason why this might be so?
Willful Ignorance in our Culture
The closer I get to the Lord the more ugly this world becomes. I am at a loss to understand why some Christians don't seem to notice.
Perhaps the superficial believers are so enveloped in their fun filled life of pleasure that they ignore what should be obvious.
I guess when people don't want to see something they close their spiritual eyes to remain willfully ignorant.
Sadly though, willful ignorance does not absolve mankind of their negligence to call truth what it is, it merely makes them think so.
Job 21:14
"They say to God, 'Depart from us! We do not even desire the knowledge of Your ways."
Matthew 13:15
"FOR THE HEART OF THIS PEOPLE HAS BECOME DULL, WITH THEIR EARS THEY SCARCELY HEAR, AND THEY HAVE CLOSED THEIR EYES, OTHERWISE THEY WOULD SEE WITH THEIR EYES, HEAR WITH THEIR EARS, AND UNDERSTAND WITH THEIR HEART AND RETURN, AND I WOULD HEAL THEM.'"
We are there folks, right in the middle of the mess, thankfully the Lord is coming soon!!!!!
Perhaps the superficial believers are so enveloped in their fun filled life of pleasure that they ignore what should be obvious.
I guess when people don't want to see something they close their spiritual eyes to remain willfully ignorant.
Sadly though, willful ignorance does not absolve mankind of their negligence to call truth what it is, it merely makes them think so.
Job 21:14
"They say to God, 'Depart from us! We do not even desire the knowledge of Your ways."
Matthew 13:15
"FOR THE HEART OF THIS PEOPLE HAS BECOME DULL, WITH THEIR EARS THEY SCARCELY HEAR, AND THEY HAVE CLOSED THEIR EYES, OTHERWISE THEY WOULD SEE WITH THEIR EYES, HEAR WITH THEIR EARS, AND UNDERSTAND WITH THEIR HEART AND RETURN, AND I WOULD HEAL THEM.'"
We are there folks, right in the middle of the mess, thankfully the Lord is coming soon!!!!!
The Bratty Liberal
Liberals are narcissists, they scream tolerance and are the least tolerant of all people. They claim others are mean when they are being mean. They want their say but do not allow others to have their say without an act of revenge perpetrated against them. This is the state of the end times, irrational demands on the part of adults who act like bratty six year olds.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 describes it for us and verse five tells us what to do about it.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 describes it for us and verse five tells us what to do about it.
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