Narcissists are very good at accusing others of what the narcissists are doing and the others are not. the reason for this is because they believe everyone is just like them.
The narcissist lies on a regular basis so they believe others are lying when they are not.
The narcissist has a grandiose view of their own physical health so they will think others are lying when they are in pain or having a problem of any sort. Often they feel bothered when someone near them is ill or has a need. You will find them never available for those in need unless it elevates them in some way.
The narcissist will never do a kind act unless it can be seen by or boasted of to others. They expect grandiose adulation whenever they do a good deed.
The Bible is very clear that our good deeds should be done without fanfare. If we make a point of informing others of our good deeds then we have lost a reward in heaven.
Matthew 6:1-2 "1 Be careful not to perform your righteous acts before men to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven. 2 So when you give to the needy, do not sound a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their full reward.…"
There are many lovely unsung people who have served God faithfully all their lives with almost no one knowing it. In fact the narcissists will see their good deeds and call them foolish. The narcissists will also often claim the others do not do good deeds. The man or woman of God has such love for God and others that they do not parade their good deeds in front of mankind.
The narcissist, because of self focus does not realize their boasting about helping someone else hurts the one they help. It makes them feel like a means to an end and an object being used for the self glory of the server.
The most genuine acts of love and kindness are those no one knows about, the ones that were done out of God's love without an agenda for self glorification.
Perhaps many loving people will have rewards in heaven they did not expect because they were not looking for them, they were merely caring deeply about someone without any thought of gaining anything for themselves.
On several occasions in my life I have experienced those who boast about their good deeds. I cannot express the discomfort I felt as I listened to their boasting. Perhaps there was discomfort because I had no way of knowing if what they were telling me was actually true. Many people who boast embellish the stories they tell so they come out the special one.
It is not bad to share with a close friend the things we are doing, especially if they will pray and support what God is telling us to do. However it is entirely another thing to boast to just anyone to gain praise from them.
If we are still becoming excited about our good deeds then there is more work needed in us. Those who do good deeds to please God don't think about what they do, they are too focused on the need of the person to spend any time on how good they feel about themselves. True servers are too focused on the needs of others to notice their own feelings.
Matthew 6:5
"And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites. For they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. Truly I tell you, they already have their full reward."
No comments:
Post a Comment