Important clues that someone you love is a narcissist. Everyone has done or said mean things from time to time in their life, it is part of the human condition. Those who are born again hate it when they do it, confess it and never want to do it again.
However, when these attitudes are a continual life experience, we can be sure there is a lifestyle and heart of sinfulness involved. I find it hard to believe that a born again believer would possess these traits on a continual basis, when God says "you shall know them by their fruits."
Traits of a deeply selfish person:
Traits list comes from: "Narcissistic Relationships: The Downside to Loving a Narcissist"
"*Sense of entitlement or superiority
•*Lack of empathy
•*Manipulative or controlling behavior
•*Strong need for admiration
•*Focus on getting one’s own needs met, often ignoring the needs of others
•*Higher levels of aggression
•*Difficulty taking feedback about their behavior"
•*Lack of empathy
•*Manipulative or controlling behavior
•*Strong need for admiration
•*Focus on getting one’s own needs met, often ignoring the needs of others
•*Higher levels of aggression
•*Difficulty taking feedback about their behavior"
God says this about the fruit of God's Spirit in a believers life;
Luke 6:44 ""For each tree is known by its own fruit. For men do not gather figs from thorns, nor do they pick grapes from a briar bush."
Galatians 5:22-23 "22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."
We know deep in our soul when someone is walking rebelliously or when they love the Lord. Oil and water don't mix, our Spirit bears witness with the Spirit of those who love Christ, but we do not connect with those who claim to be Christians but live a lifestyle of arrogance centered on humanistic wisdom and self exaltation.
It is not a good idea to assume someone is a Christian because they say they are, it is best to confront them on their lifestyle and attitudes and send them to God to ask Him if they were ever born again. Chances are good, if we are met with rage and hatred over our challenge, the person we confront is not born again.
Those who are born again, feel humbled and sad that they have displayed sinful tendencies and will go to prayer to see if it is true. Chances are good they will have seen their own behavior before they were confronted while the Holy Spirit was convicting them.
Rage and anger is a clue that we are dealing with someone who has never been changed into a new creation, but has learned the cultural Christian things to say and be in the presence of others, while showing a completely different persona to those they have no respect for, usually anyone who sees the real them.
May the Lord guide us in truth as we walk through this life. It is better to offend someone for a time to bring them to repentance, than to flatter them now and watch their life further deteriorate or comfort them into hell.
2 Corinthians 7:1-9 "1 Therefore, having these promises, beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all defilement of flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God.
2 Make room for us in your hearts; we wronged no one, we corrupted no one, we took advantage of no one.
3 I do not speak to condemn you, for I have said before that you are in our hearts to die together and to live together.
4 Great is my confidence in you; great is my boasting on your behalf. I am filled with comfort; I am overflowing with joy in all our affliction.
5 For even when we came into Macedonia our flesh had no rest, but we were afflicted on every side: conflicts without, fears within.
6 But God, who comforts the depressed, comforted us by the coming of Titus;
7 and not only by his coming, but also by the comfort with which he was comforted in you, as he reported to us your longing, your mourning, your zeal for me; so that I rejoiced even more.
8 For though * I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it; though * I did regret it-for I see that that letter caused you sorrow, though * only for a while -
9 I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for you were made sorrowful according to the will of God, so that you might not suffer loss in anything through us."
2 Make room for us in your hearts; we wronged no one, we corrupted no one, we took advantage of no one.
3 I do not speak to condemn you, for I have said before that you are in our hearts to die together and to live together.
4 Great is my confidence in you; great is my boasting on your behalf. I am filled with comfort; I am overflowing with joy in all our affliction.
5 For even when we came into Macedonia our flesh had no rest, but we were afflicted on every side: conflicts without, fears within.
6 But God, who comforts the depressed, comforted us by the coming of Titus;
7 and not only by his coming, but also by the comfort with which he was comforted in you, as he reported to us your longing, your mourning, your zeal for me; so that I rejoiced even more.
8 For though * I caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it; though * I did regret it-for I see that that letter caused you sorrow, though * only for a while -
9 I now rejoice, not that you were made sorrowful, but that you were made sorrowful to the point of repentance; for you were made sorrowful according to the will of God, so that you might not suffer loss in anything through us."
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