Love and its Expressions

Love has a wide range of expressions. If it ever includes discipline then it ought to show a great deal of empathy toward those who need to be encouraged to stop their sin and return to the fold cleansed of their sin through confession and forgiveness.

Without confession, there can be no forgiveness. Confession and forgiveness are two sides to the same coin that leads to reconciliation. No one can be reconciled if one party refuses to confess or when they confess the other side will not forgive. Both are necessary for reconciliation.

There is a deep cleansing that occurs in someone who is willing to own their sins enough to confess. There can be no cleansing and no character reform without confession of sin.

It doesn't even matter for the one who confesses if they are forgiven, only that they own it. Those who are commanded to forgive when someone confesses will become bitter and are in sin by not forgiving.

In order for confession and forgiveness to occur God's way there must be a discussion of what happened. Without discussion of the problem confession and forgiveness do nothing, they are only words that hit the ceiling and fall to the ground.

We live in a culture that thinks and acts as though we are to "just let everything go without discussion. It is not possible to trust someone who has offended you when they will not have a discussion for the purpose of learning the hurt and heart of the other person.

Those who love others want to understand and they hate to do anything that is offensive. Prideful people justify themselves or outright deny the things they do. They will often blame the victim of their abuse for the problems in their relationships.

Let me be clear.....no one will change their character who refuses to own their own wrong attitudes and actions. They cannot be trusted if they cannot be honest about the details. They can also not be trusted if they justify bad behavior by blaming others.

If we are empathetic, kind and loving we will want to admit where we went wrong, people who do this will grow emotionally and spiritually.

Those who go to the end of their life remaining stubborn, refusing to admit their wrong attitudes and actions will not grow and will even regress, becoming more childish as they grow older.

Do not be a fool, self reflect often, admit often and keep comparing yourself with Christ and you will never have a high opinion of yourself or a low opinion of others.

Proverbs 26:1-12

"Similitudes and Instructions

26 Like snow in summer and like rain in harvest,

So honor is not fitting for a fool.

2 Like a sparrow in its flitting, like a swallow in its flying,

So a curse without cause does not come to rest.

3 A whip is for the horse, a bridle for the donkey,

And a rod for the back of fools.

4 Do not answer a fool according to his foolishness,

Or you will also be like him.

5 Answer a fool as his foolishness deserves,

So that he will not be wise in his own eyes.

6 One who sends a message by the hand of a fool

Chops off his own feet and drinks violence.

7 Like useless legs to one who cannot walk,

So is a proverb in the mouths of fools.

8 Like one who binds a stone in a sling,

So is one who gives honor to a fool.

9 Like a thorn that sticks in the hand of a heavy drinker,

So is a proverb in the mouths of fools.

10 Like an archer who wounds everyone,

So is one who hires a fool or hires those who pass by.

11 Like a dog that returns to its vomit,

So is a fool who repeats his foolishness.

12 Do you see a person wise in his own eyes?

There is more hope for a fool than for him."

When a friend is content to pretend nothing is wrong when an offense has occurred, we know this person is not a friend. A true friend hates offending others, no matter who it is that became offended. We want to clear it up, if there is no desire to clear up an offense we know this person is not our friend.

If we don't care enough about a relationship to want to clear misunderstandings up or to confess a sin, then we are no-ones friend either.