In my experience a narcissist has no interest in having a relationship with anyone, they want subjects who worship them.
When someone comes along and does not worship them it enrages them on the inside.
I see so much anger inside these people even when they are not raging on the outside. It is impossible to work out a problem with a narcissist because they love the trouble they cause their target. Trouble and irrational arguments are candy to the narcissist.
Proverbs 26:4-14
"4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
Or you will also be like him.
5 Answer a fool as his folly deserves,
That he is not wise in his own eyes.
6 He cuts off his own feet and drinks violence
Who sends a message by the hand of a fool.
7 Like the legs which are useless to the lame,
So is a proverb in the mouth of fools.
8 Like one who binds a stone in a sling,
So is he who gives honor to a fool.
9 Like a thorn which falls into the hand of a drunkard,
So is a proverb in the mouth of fools.
10 Like an archer who wounds everyone,
So is he who hires a fool or who hires those who pass by.
11 Like a dog that returns to its vomit
Is a fool who repeats his folly."
Monday, March 9, 2020
Women in Christianity
All the religions of the world demean and denigrate women. It is only Christianity that elevates them to a position of honor and value to be appreciated as counselors to their men.
When we honor someone it has little to do with bringing them a cup of coffee or putting a coat on them although this can be a part of it. The greatest honor one can show toward a woman is to value her spirit, her thoughts, and her talents.
Ephesians 5:25-26 "25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her 26 to sanctify her, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,…"
It is not loving or honoring to bark orders at a wife treating her as an "underling" or a "child." She is an important partner in life together with her husband. When he leaves her out of decisions, keeps secrets and wants no input from his wife he is selfish as well as foolish.
In our world today the Christian church has become apostate, operating more like pagans than they do like Christ.
Devaluing women is the practice of all pagan religions as well as ruthless and narcissistic men who have no religion.
Christ elevated women when He told men to the status of a valued expensive china vessel to be carefully protected. A man who elevates himself without love for his wife is dishonoring God and therefore hindering his prayers. If a man will not obey God in treating women with love and respect, he will be the most miserable man who is not blessed by God.
1 Peter 3
3 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,
2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;
4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;
6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right [b]without being frightened by any fear.
7 You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
8 To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit;
9 not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but [e]giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
10 For,
“The one who desires life, to love and see good days,
Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.
11 “He must turn away from evil and do good;
He must seek peace and pursue it.
12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,
And His ears attend to their prayer,
Bu
13 Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good?
Sadly too a man who treats a woman with contempt, snapping at her for having her own mind will teach the children to treat her with contempt also.
Men are never to speak disrespectfully to a woman just to have his own way. He is to listen to her, consider her input and genuinely desire to please her wherever he can. Snappishness toward a wife or any woman is sin. Snappishness is a demonstration of contempt and an attitude of superiority. The men and women's roles are different but neither is more important than the other, they are equal in God's eyes.
The man is the wage earner and the woman is the manager of the home. Neither one can say they are better than the other. Each calling is ordained by God, therefore to minimize the others' calling is to usurp God.
God did not give the job leader of the home to the woman, this must not be disregarded. It was given by God. God did not give the job of household counselor and manager to the husband, it was given by God to the woman. When a man attempts to manage the home, dictating to the woman how to run it he is usurping God. PROVERBS 31 is very clear about the roles of the woman and the roles of the man, they are distinct and work well when they support one another in their jobs.
Leadership is not a dictatorship in the home. The man leads by example and by the reading and washing of the Word. He makes suggestions and requests when he desires something to be done a certain way, but he does not demand or dictate, the decision of the home belongs to the woman.
The woman does not demand or force her husband either in his career, dictating where they live or what job he does. She makes requests, shares her wisdom and leaves the final decision to her husband.
If her husband is unreasonable wanting to do illegal or hurtful things the wife must never support that or engage in the sin he wants to commit. She must obey God first. Remember Abigail when she refused to obey her husband when he was clearly wrong, she averted a battle and bloodshed by obeying God first. It was to the benefit of her husband that she did this.
James 4:7 submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you."
Husbands and wives are commanded by God to submit one to another.
Eph. 5:21 "and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ."
Col. 3:18 "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord."
Did we notice this: "submitting as it is fitting to the Lord." We obey and submit to our husbands when they honor the Lord, but we do not when they dishonor Him by disrespecting God's Word.
1 Peter 3:7
"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered."
A man who is selfishly refusing to regard the wife with honor can not expect to develop closeness with his wife. He may have a servant but he will not have intimacy. And, sadly this is the state of many marriages today, the men or sometimes women would rather be feared and obeyed than loved.
And finally, when we obey Christ in treating everyone lovingly and with honor no matter their status or life, we will be glorifying God. Those who will only honor those they think will elevate themselves, do not love anyone except themselves.
When we honor someone it has little to do with bringing them a cup of coffee or putting a coat on them although this can be a part of it. The greatest honor one can show toward a woman is to value her spirit, her thoughts, and her talents.
Ephesians 5:25-26 "25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her 26 to sanctify her, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,…"
It is not loving or honoring to bark orders at a wife treating her as an "underling" or a "child." She is an important partner in life together with her husband. When he leaves her out of decisions, keeps secrets and wants no input from his wife he is selfish as well as foolish.
In our world today the Christian church has become apostate, operating more like pagans than they do like Christ.
Devaluing women is the practice of all pagan religions as well as ruthless and narcissistic men who have no religion.
Christ elevated women when He told men to the status of a valued expensive china vessel to be carefully protected. A man who elevates himself without love for his wife is dishonoring God and therefore hindering his prayers. If a man will not obey God in treating women with love and respect, he will be the most miserable man who is not blessed by God.
1 Peter 3
3 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,
2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;
4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;
6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right [b]without being frightened by any fear.
7 You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
8 To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit;
9 not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but [e]giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
10 For,
“The one who desires life, to love and see good days,
Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.
11 “He must turn away from evil and do good;
He must seek peace and pursue it.
12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,
And His ears attend to their prayer,
Bu
13 Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good?
Sadly too a man who treats a woman with contempt, snapping at her for having her own mind will teach the children to treat her with contempt also.
Men are never to speak disrespectfully to a woman just to have his own way. He is to listen to her, consider her input and genuinely desire to please her wherever he can. Snappishness toward a wife or any woman is sin. Snappishness is a demonstration of contempt and an attitude of superiority. The men and women's roles are different but neither is more important than the other, they are equal in God's eyes.
The man is the wage earner and the woman is the manager of the home. Neither one can say they are better than the other. Each calling is ordained by God, therefore to minimize the others' calling is to usurp God.
God did not give the job leader of the home to the woman, this must not be disregarded. It was given by God. God did not give the job of household counselor and manager to the husband, it was given by God to the woman. When a man attempts to manage the home, dictating to the woman how to run it he is usurping God. PROVERBS 31 is very clear about the roles of the woman and the roles of the man, they are distinct and work well when they support one another in their jobs.
Leadership is not a dictatorship in the home. The man leads by example and by the reading and washing of the Word. He makes suggestions and requests when he desires something to be done a certain way, but he does not demand or dictate, the decision of the home belongs to the woman.
The woman does not demand or force her husband either in his career, dictating where they live or what job he does. She makes requests, shares her wisdom and leaves the final decision to her husband.
If her husband is unreasonable wanting to do illegal or hurtful things the wife must never support that or engage in the sin he wants to commit. She must obey God first. Remember Abigail when she refused to obey her husband when he was clearly wrong, she averted a battle and bloodshed by obeying God first. It was to the benefit of her husband that she did this.
James 4:7 submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you."
Husbands and wives are commanded by God to submit one to another.
Eph. 5:21 "and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ."
Col. 3:18 "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord."
Did we notice this: "submitting as it is fitting to the Lord." We obey and submit to our husbands when they honor the Lord, but we do not when they dishonor Him by disrespecting God's Word.
1 Peter 3:7
"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered."
A man who is selfishly refusing to regard the wife with honor can not expect to develop closeness with his wife. He may have a servant but he will not have intimacy. And, sadly this is the state of many marriages today, the men or sometimes women would rather be feared and obeyed than loved.
And finally, when we obey Christ in treating everyone lovingly and with honor no matter their status or life, we will be glorifying God. Those who will only honor those they think will elevate themselves, do not love anyone except themselves.
They are Only Aping their Parents
Are we surprised when young people are shacking up without the benefit of marriage? After all, they see their parents hopping from bed to bed in their remarriages.
This is also the reason parents cannot chastise the young people for their choice to fornicate because the parents are doing the same thing and calling it marriage.
Luke 16:17-18 "17 But it is easier for heaven and earth to pass away than for a single stroke of a pen to drop out of the Law. 18Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and he who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. "
This is also the reason parents cannot chastise the young people for their choice to fornicate because the parents are doing the same thing and calling it marriage.
Luke 16:17-18 "17 But it is easier for heaven and earth to pass away than for a single stroke of a pen to drop out of the Law. 18Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and he who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. "
The Apostisizing of the End Times Church
I meet churchgoers here all the time who are shacking up, even having children out of wedlock and no one cares.
The churches have baby showers for unwed mothers living with boyfriends.
Pastors are divorcing and remarrying while still pastors. No one cares. Of course, it's not all churches but so many if is clear it has been accepted by the culture as a whole.
They say "don't judge" a lot to silence anyone from rebuking their sin as declared by God. Is it any wonder that our culture is becoming more perverted all the time, the snowball is rolling and there is no stopping it.
Jeremiah 6:15 " 15 Were they ashamed of the abomination they committed? No, they were not at all ashamed. They did not even know how to blush. So they will fall among the fallen; when I punish them, they will collapse,” says the LORD."
If anyone corrects them for their sin they rage at the messenger and all their "flying monkies" (their friends) also reject the one who brings truth from God.
Lot was vexed daily and so am I! I know many of you are too, anxiously awaiting our home-going.
The churches have baby showers for unwed mothers living with boyfriends.
Pastors are divorcing and remarrying while still pastors. No one cares. Of course, it's not all churches but so many if is clear it has been accepted by the culture as a whole.
They say "don't judge" a lot to silence anyone from rebuking their sin as declared by God. Is it any wonder that our culture is becoming more perverted all the time, the snowball is rolling and there is no stopping it.
Jeremiah 6:15 " 15 Were they ashamed of the abomination they committed? No, they were not at all ashamed. They did not even know how to blush. So they will fall among the fallen; when I punish them, they will collapse,” says the LORD."
If anyone corrects them for their sin they rage at the messenger and all their "flying monkies" (their friends) also reject the one who brings truth from God.
Lot was vexed daily and so am I! I know many of you are too, anxiously awaiting our home-going.
The Spies Within
As usual, when we speak the word of God there will be spies coming among the sheep to cause division with false doctrine and worldly assertions.
1 John 4:1
Beloved, do not believe every spirit but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.
These false teachers will bring every life circumstance to bear claiming that God would not want us to endure anything hard. They bring little or no scripture if there is scripture it is out of context leaving one with the opposite of what God actually said.
One of the mantras we hear all the time is "don't judge" with all the supporting scriptures omitted. They leave people with the impression that we are never to judge anyone about anything ever.
The bible does not say not to judge, God said in His word that we are not to judge others for things we are doing also. Then He commands us to take the log out of our own eye BEFORE judging others. In other words, after we have removed the log from our own eye we can judge without hypocrisy.
Here is what God actually said about judging:
John 7:24
"Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.”
Matthew 7:1-29
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure, you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. ..."
Proverbs 31:9
"Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy."
1 Corinthians 2:14-16
"The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned. The spiritual person judges all things but is himself to be judged by no one. “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ."
These are only a few passages, how can we possibly avoid evil men as we are commanded to do unless we judge them as evil? We judge many things in this world and many people, it is Christ in us who tells us through His Word what His judgments are, we merely repeat Him.
1 John 4:1
Beloved, do not believe every spirit but test the spirits to see whether they are from God, for many false prophets have gone out into the world.
These false teachers will bring every life circumstance to bear claiming that God would not want us to endure anything hard. They bring little or no scripture if there is scripture it is out of context leaving one with the opposite of what God actually said.
One of the mantras we hear all the time is "don't judge" with all the supporting scriptures omitted. They leave people with the impression that we are never to judge anyone about anything ever.
The bible does not say not to judge, God said in His word that we are not to judge others for things we are doing also. Then He commands us to take the log out of our own eye BEFORE judging others. In other words, after we have removed the log from our own eye we can judge without hypocrisy.
Here is what God actually said about judging:
John 7:24
"Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.”
Matthew 7:1-29
“Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure, you use it will be measured to you. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye. ..."
Proverbs 31:9
"Open your mouth, judge righteously, defend the rights of the poor and needy."
1 Corinthians 2:14-16
"The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned. The spiritual person judges all things but is himself to be judged by no one. “For who has understood the mind of the Lord so as to instruct him?” But we have the mind of Christ."
These are only a few passages, how can we possibly avoid evil men as we are commanded to do unless we judge them as evil? We judge many things in this world and many people, it is Christ in us who tells us through His Word what His judgments are, we merely repeat Him.
Forgiveness is not for Our Own Sake Alone
Forgiveness is not for us, it is for the sake of one who is sorrowful over their sin and for the reconciliation of the relationship.
Forgiveness is for the reconciliation of the relationship. We are not required to forgive someone who is not sorry, the relationship remains broken when there has not been a confession. Superficial forgiveness is worldly not from God's Word.
Superficial forgiveness damages further the one who offended. Those who are not sorry and are treated as though they did nothing wrong do often further harden their hearts.
1 John 1:9
"9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
Notice the word "IF" we confess! There are conditions to salvation and there are conditions to forgiveness. God will not forgive those who reject Him and the truth. We are not to superficially forgive to make ourselves feel better.
Ephesians 4:31-32 "…31Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, outcry and slander, along with every form of malice. 32Be kind and tender-hearted to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you."
Requiring confession brings necessary accountability to the one who sins against us. IF they are not willing to confess then they are not willing to change their behavior and the relationship cannot be restored.
God is for restoration, not mere feelings. God does not punish a person who withholds forgiveness from those who don't even want it. He commands us to get away from a wicked man, even to turn them over to the devil at times to be buffetted by the devil so they will repent.
Isaiah 26:10 "10 Though grace is shown to the wicked man, he does not learn righteousness. In the land of righteousness, he acts unjustly and fails to see the majesty of the LORD."
Forgiving someone who is not sorry is selfish, it elevates self but does nothing to help the sinner to repent. If a sinner will not be sorry and the relationship ends then that is on the sinner not on the one who wanted to fix the relationship or help in the character growth of one who is stubborn. Superficial forgiveness fixes nothing, it only serves to make someone "feel" better for themselves.
Isaiah 26:10 "10Though grace is shown to the wicked man, he does not learn righteousness. In the land of righteousness, he acts unjustly and fails to see the majesty of the LORD. "
Our modern idea of forgiving without confession comes from psychology, not God. It enables many people to remain wicked without having to think about their actions. Consequences are important. If we love others we will help them learn to be better people through the teaching of God's Word.
Because of the modern idea that we should forgive everyone who is not sorry, evil has grown unabated while wicked people feel empowered to continue their sin. There is an entitlement mentality that others are obligated to put up with their evil, even endorse it so the wicked man is not offended. Never mind all the others this evil person has harmed.
Should we say then that all criminals, murderers, thieves, and rapists should be forgiven without ever going to jail? This would, of course, be silly, but that's pretty much the idea behind forgiving someone who still loves their sin.
IF anyone would say, of course, all these criminals should go to jail. Wait a minute, if criminals should go to jail and we know that forgiveness is a canceling of the offense, then the criminals should be forgiven and never spend even one night in jail.
Christ paid the debt of sin for all mankind, but there is a condition to receiving that freedom from our debt of sin, that is we must confess our sin and trust in Christ. HE is our example of how forgiveness works.
1 Corinthians 5
1 It is actually reported that there is immorality among you, and immorality of such a kind as does not exist even among the Gentiles, that someone has his father’s wife.
2 You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst.
3 For I, on my part, though absent in body but present in spirit, have already judged him who has so committed this, as though I were present.
4 In the name of our Lord Jesus, when you are assembled, and I with you in spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus,
5 I have decided to deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of his flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
6 Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough?
7 Clean out the old leaven so that you may be a new lump, just as you are in fact unleavened. For Christ, our Passover also has been sacrificed.
8 Therefore let us celebrate the feast, not with old leaven, nor with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.
9 I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; 10 I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world.
11 But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler—not even to eat with such a one.
12 For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church?
13 But those who are outside, God judges. Remove the wicked man from among yourselves."
Hebrews 3:13 " 13 But exhort one another daily, as long as it is called today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. "
If you love the one who offended you then you must tell them their sin or fault so that they will know what is needed to become right with God and with you. Withholding this information is not love for the offender, but it is the love of self. Love of self is a lack of consideration for the well being of others.
Philippians 2:3-4 "3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests but also to the interests of others.…"
So many people are terribly proud of how tolerant and forgiving they are toward unrepentant people, because of this many offenders grow worse and full of entitlement because there were no consequences for their evil.
Please pray about this, nearly everything people are taught today about the principles of God have been twisted to mean what the devil wants, it diminishes relationships, further hardens hearts and causes evil to grow more rapidly and intensely.
IF you want to restore a relationship, require confession if the offender will not then you have seen his heart.
Matthew 18:15-18
"15 “If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.
16 But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed.
17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector (an enemy).
18 Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven."
Forgiveness is for the reconciliation of the relationship. We are not required to forgive someone who is not sorry, the relationship remains broken when there has not been a confession. Superficial forgiveness is worldly not from God's Word.
Superficial forgiveness damages further the one who offended. Those who are not sorry and are treated as though they did nothing wrong do often further harden their hearts.
1 John 1:9
"9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
Notice the word "IF" we confess! There are conditions to salvation and there are conditions to forgiveness. God will not forgive those who reject Him and the truth. We are not to superficially forgive to make ourselves feel better.
Ephesians 4:31-32 "…31Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, outcry and slander, along with every form of malice. 32Be kind and tender-hearted to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ God forgave you."
Requiring confession brings necessary accountability to the one who sins against us. IF they are not willing to confess then they are not willing to change their behavior and the relationship cannot be restored.
God is for restoration, not mere feelings. God does not punish a person who withholds forgiveness from those who don't even want it. He commands us to get away from a wicked man, even to turn them over to the devil at times to be buffetted by the devil so they will repent.
Isaiah 26:10 "10 Though grace is shown to the wicked man, he does not learn righteousness. In the land of righteousness, he acts unjustly and fails to see the majesty of the LORD."
Forgiving someone who is not sorry is selfish, it elevates self but does nothing to help the sinner to repent. If a sinner will not be sorry and the relationship ends then that is on the sinner not on the one who wanted to fix the relationship or help in the character growth of one who is stubborn. Superficial forgiveness fixes nothing, it only serves to make someone "feel" better for themselves.
Isaiah 26:10 "10Though grace is shown to the wicked man, he does not learn righteousness. In the land of righteousness, he acts unjustly and fails to see the majesty of the LORD. "
Our modern idea of forgiving without confession comes from psychology, not God. It enables many people to remain wicked without having to think about their actions. Consequences are important. If we love others we will help them learn to be better people through the teaching of God's Word.
Because of the modern idea that we should forgive everyone who is not sorry, evil has grown unabated while wicked people feel empowered to continue their sin. There is an entitlement mentality that others are obligated to put up with their evil, even endorse it so the wicked man is not offended. Never mind all the others this evil person has harmed.
Should we say then that all criminals, murderers, thieves, and rapists should be forgiven without ever going to jail? This would, of course, be silly, but that's pretty much the idea behind forgiving someone who still loves their sin.
IF anyone would say, of course, all these criminals should go to jail. Wait a minute, if criminals should go to jail and we know that forgiveness is a canceling of the offense, then the criminals should be forgiven and never spend even one night in jail.
Christ paid the debt of sin for all mankind, but there is a condition to receiving that freedom from our debt of sin, that is we must confess our sin and trust in Christ. HE is our example of how forgiveness works.
1 Corinthians 5
1 It is actually reported that there is immorality among you, and immorality of such a kind as does not exist even among the Gentiles, that someone has his father’s wife.
2 You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst.
3 For I, on my part, though absent in body but present in spirit, have already judged him who has so committed this, as though I were present.
4 In the name of our Lord Jesus, when you are assembled, and I with you in spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus,
5 I have decided to deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of his flesh, so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.
6 Your boasting is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump of dough?
7 Clean out the old leaven so that you may be a new lump, just as you are in fact unleavened. For Christ, our Passover also has been sacrificed.
8 Therefore let us celebrate the feast, not with old leaven, nor with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.
9 I wrote you in my letter not to associate with immoral people; 10 I did not at all mean with the immoral people of this world, or with the covetous and swindlers, or with idolaters, for then you would have to go out of the world.
11 But actually, I wrote to you not to associate with any so-called brother if he is an immoral person, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or a swindler—not even to eat with such a one.
12 For what have I to do with judging outsiders? Do you not judge those who are within the church?
13 But those who are outside, God judges. Remove the wicked man from among yourselves."
Hebrews 3:13 " 13 But exhort one another daily, as long as it is called today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. "
If you love the one who offended you then you must tell them their sin or fault so that they will know what is needed to become right with God and with you. Withholding this information is not love for the offender, but it is the love of self. Love of self is a lack of consideration for the well being of others.
Philippians 2:3-4 "3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests but also to the interests of others.…"
So many people are terribly proud of how tolerant and forgiving they are toward unrepentant people, because of this many offenders grow worse and full of entitlement because there were no consequences for their evil.
Please pray about this, nearly everything people are taught today about the principles of God have been twisted to mean what the devil wants, it diminishes relationships, further hardens hearts and causes evil to grow more rapidly and intensely.
IF you want to restore a relationship, require confession if the offender will not then you have seen his heart.
Matthew 18:15-18
"15 “If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother.
16 But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed.
17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector (an enemy).
18 Truly I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall have been bound in heaven; and whatever you loose on earth shall have been loosed in heaven."
Submit One to Another!
Nowhere in the Bible does it say every woman is to submit to every man the way she interacts with her husband.
Ephesians 5:22-33
"22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.
24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything."
Every man is not the head of every woman. One man is head of the woman and that is the husband.
Ephesians 5:22-33
"22 Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body.
24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything."
Every man is not the head of every woman. One man is head of the woman and that is the husband.
God's View of the Marriage
All the religions of the world demean and denigrate women. It is only Christianity that elevates them to a position of honor, value to be appreciated as counselors to their men.
When we honor someone it has little to do with bring them a cup of coffee or put a coat on them although this can be a part of it. The greatest honor one can show toward a woman is to value her spirit, her thoughts, and her talents.
Ephesians 5:25-26 "25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her 26 to sanctify her, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,…"
It is not loving or honoring to bark orders at a wife treating her as an "underling" or a "child." She is an important partner in life together with her husband. When he leaves her out of decisions, keeps secrets and wants no input from his wife he is selfish as well as foolish.
In our world today the Christian church has become apostate, operating more like pagans than they do like Christ.
Devaluing women is the practice of all pagan religions as well as ruthless and narcissistic men who have no religion.
Christ elevated women when He told men to the status of a valued expensive china vessel to be carefully protected. A man who elevates himself without love for his wife is dishonoring God and therefore hindering his prayers. If a man will not obey God by treating women with love and respect, he will be the most miserable man who is not blessed by God.
1 Peter 3
3 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,
2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;
4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;
6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right [b]without being frightened by any fear.
7 You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
8 To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit;
9 not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but [e]giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
10 For,
“The one who desires life, to love and see good days,
Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.
11 “He must turn away from evil and do good;
He must seek peace and pursue it.
12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,
And His ears attend to their prayer,
Bu
13 Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good?
Sadly too a man who treats a woman with contempt, snapping at her for having her own mind will teach the children to treat her with contempt also.
Men are never to speak disrespectfully to a woman just to have his own way. He is to listen to her, consider her input and genuinely desire to please her wherever he can. Snappishness toward a wife or any woman is sin. Snappishness is a demonstration of contempt and an attitude of superiority. The men and women's roles are different but neither is more important than the other, they are equal in God's eyes.
The man is the wage earner and the woman is the manager of the home. Neither one can say they are better than the other. Each calling is ordained by God, therefore to minimize the others' calling is to usurp God.
God did not give the job leader of the home to the woman, this must not be disregarded. It was given by God. God did not give the job of household counselor and manager to the husband, it was given by God to the woman. When a man attempts to manage the home, dictating to the woman how to run it he is usurping God. PROVERBS 31 is very clear about the roles of the woman and the roles of the man, they are distinct and work well when they support one another in their jobs.
Leadership is not a dictatorship in the home. The man leads by example and by the reading and washing of the Word. He makes suggestions and requests when he desires something to be done a certain way, but he does not demand or dictate, the decision of the home belongs to the woman.
The woman does not demand or force her husband either in his career, dictating where they live or what job he does. She makes requests, shares her wisdom and leaves the final decision to her husband.
If her husband is unreasonable wanting to do illegal or hurtful things the wife must never support that or engage in the sin he wants to commit. She must obey God first. Remember Abigail when she refused to obey her husband when he was clearly wrong, she averted a battle and bloodshed by obeying God first. It was to the benefit of her husband that she did this.
James 4:7 submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you."
Husbands and wives are commanded by God to submit one to another.
Eph. 5:21 "and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ."
Col. 3:18 "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord."
Did we notice this: "submitting as it is fitting to the Lord." We obey and submit to our husbands when they honor the Lord, but we do not when they dishonor Him by disrespecting God's Word.
1 Peter 3:7
"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered."
A man who is selfishly refusing to regard the wife with honor can not expect to develop closeness with his wife. He may have a servant but he will not have intimacy. And, sadly this is the state of many marriages today, the men or sometimes women would rather be feared and obeyed than loved.
And finally, when we obey Christ in treating everyone lovingly and with honor no matter their status or life, we will be glorifying God. Those who will only honor those they think will elevate themselves, do not love anyone except themselves.
When we honor someone it has little to do with bring them a cup of coffee or put a coat on them although this can be a part of it. The greatest honor one can show toward a woman is to value her spirit, her thoughts, and her talents.
Ephesians 5:25-26 "25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her 26 to sanctify her, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,…"
It is not loving or honoring to bark orders at a wife treating her as an "underling" or a "child." She is an important partner in life together with her husband. When he leaves her out of decisions, keeps secrets and wants no input from his wife he is selfish as well as foolish.
In our world today the Christian church has become apostate, operating more like pagans than they do like Christ.
Devaluing women is the practice of all pagan religions as well as ruthless and narcissistic men who have no religion.
Christ elevated women when He told men to the status of a valued expensive china vessel to be carefully protected. A man who elevates himself without love for his wife is dishonoring God and therefore hindering his prayers. If a man will not obey God by treating women with love and respect, he will be the most miserable man who is not blessed by God.
1 Peter 3
3 In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives,
2 as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. 3 Your adornment must not be merely external—braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses;
4 but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God.
5 For in this way in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, used to adorn themselves, being submissive to their own husbands;
6 just as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right [b]without being frightened by any fear.
7 You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.
8 To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit;
9 not returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but [e]giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you might inherit a blessing.
10 For,
“The one who desires life, to love and see good days,
Must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit.
11 “He must turn away from evil and do good;
He must seek peace and pursue it.
12 “For the eyes of the Lord are toward the righteous,
And His ears attend to their prayer,
Bu
13 Who is there to harm you if you prove zealous for what is good?
Sadly too a man who treats a woman with contempt, snapping at her for having her own mind will teach the children to treat her with contempt also.
Men are never to speak disrespectfully to a woman just to have his own way. He is to listen to her, consider her input and genuinely desire to please her wherever he can. Snappishness toward a wife or any woman is sin. Snappishness is a demonstration of contempt and an attitude of superiority. The men and women's roles are different but neither is more important than the other, they are equal in God's eyes.
The man is the wage earner and the woman is the manager of the home. Neither one can say they are better than the other. Each calling is ordained by God, therefore to minimize the others' calling is to usurp God.
God did not give the job leader of the home to the woman, this must not be disregarded. It was given by God. God did not give the job of household counselor and manager to the husband, it was given by God to the woman. When a man attempts to manage the home, dictating to the woman how to run it he is usurping God. PROVERBS 31 is very clear about the roles of the woman and the roles of the man, they are distinct and work well when they support one another in their jobs.
Leadership is not a dictatorship in the home. The man leads by example and by the reading and washing of the Word. He makes suggestions and requests when he desires something to be done a certain way, but he does not demand or dictate, the decision of the home belongs to the woman.
The woman does not demand or force her husband either in his career, dictating where they live or what job he does. She makes requests, shares her wisdom and leaves the final decision to her husband.
If her husband is unreasonable wanting to do illegal or hurtful things the wife must never support that or engage in the sin he wants to commit. She must obey God first. Remember Abigail when she refused to obey her husband when he was clearly wrong, she averted a battle and bloodshed by obeying God first. It was to the benefit of her husband that she did this.
James 4:7 submit therefore to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you."
Husbands and wives are commanded by God to submit one to another.
Eph. 5:21 "and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ."
Col. 3:18 "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord."
Did we notice this: "submitting as it is fitting to the Lord." We obey and submit to our husbands when they honor the Lord, but we do not when they dishonor Him by disrespecting God's Word.
1 Peter 3:7
"Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered."
A man who is selfishly refusing to regard the wife with honor can not expect to develop closeness with his wife. He may have a servant but he will not have intimacy. And, sadly this is the state of many marriages today, the men or sometimes women would rather be feared and obeyed than loved.
And finally, when we obey Christ in treating everyone lovingly and with honor no matter their status or life, we will be glorifying God. Those who will only honor those they think will elevate themselves, do not love anyone except themselves.
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