Monday, April 1, 2019
Do Your Actions Scream Things About You?
Sometimes we can't hear people because their actions are speaking so loud we can't hear a word they are saying.
The Thugs are Increasing
There was a day in this country when no young person except a thug would speak back to their parents or roll their eyes at them. We live in a culture now that does this regularly.
We even have rude and ruthless young people who will openly say they do not respect an older person for no other reason than that person corrected them.
2 Timothy 3:1-5
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
The greatest hope we have is that one day Christ will rule, all that is wrong will be made right! Hallelujah!
We even have rude and ruthless young people who will openly say they do not respect an older person for no other reason than that person corrected them.
2 Timothy 3:1-5
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
The greatest hope we have is that one day Christ will rule, all that is wrong will be made right! Hallelujah!
Satan's Attacks are not Personal to Us
I was asked today why I write so much about the subject of narcissism. One reason is because I have seen it up close and personal all through my life. And the second reason i s that
the problem of narcissism in relationships is worsening.
We see families being divided and cruel because the past generations have been raised on self esteem. They have been taught by the school system and the culture in general, even in churches that we should focus on loving ourselves. That "psychology" you speak of has been the driving force behind this evil. The psychology of today did not invent the term "narcissism" they merely took it from Greek mythology in which the concept of self love is being exposed as wrong and can lead to what it has led to, that is a selfish culture that is brutal.
Sadly, even "Christian Counselors" have bought into the self love lie. I have had Christians argue with me more than non-believers. The Christians have been indoctrinated that one must love themselves, causing all this meanness that we see today.
2 Timothy 3 shows us just what the full blown narcissist looks like.
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, [a]haters of good, 4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 holding to a form of [b]godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
Seculars do notice how awful people can be and what their tactics look like. They do not have the answers as to where it comes from or some of the answers as to how to deal with it Biblically.
Everyone is born with narcissistic tendencies, but some become far worse than others.
When we know how these people act on a regular basis we can know what to do.
The key in knowing our enemy is that it helps us to take them less seriously. When we hand them off to God we no longer have to have bad feelings about them. When we do not see attacks as personal to us, we are less likely to react in unbecoming ways.
Ephesians 6:10-12
The Armor of God
"10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places."
When we see our battle is in prayer against the devils that are influencing people, we do not agonize over the attack as personal to us.
And, yes, it is demons who are influencing people to be angry at the slightest hint of correction or rebuke. The hatred for God is so strong that anything that smacks of God's power over sin, will enrage the one who hates Him and because they hate Him they hate us.
the problem of narcissism in relationships is worsening.
We see families being divided and cruel because the past generations have been raised on self esteem. They have been taught by the school system and the culture in general, even in churches that we should focus on loving ourselves. That "psychology" you speak of has been the driving force behind this evil. The psychology of today did not invent the term "narcissism" they merely took it from Greek mythology in which the concept of self love is being exposed as wrong and can lead to what it has led to, that is a selfish culture that is brutal.
Sadly, even "Christian Counselors" have bought into the self love lie. I have had Christians argue with me more than non-believers. The Christians have been indoctrinated that one must love themselves, causing all this meanness that we see today.
2 Timothy 3 shows us just what the full blown narcissist looks like.
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, [a]haters of good, 4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 holding to a form of [b]godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
Seculars do notice how awful people can be and what their tactics look like. They do not have the answers as to where it comes from or some of the answers as to how to deal with it Biblically.
Everyone is born with narcissistic tendencies, but some become far worse than others.
When we know how these people act on a regular basis we can know what to do.
The key in knowing our enemy is that it helps us to take them less seriously. When we hand them off to God we no longer have to have bad feelings about them. When we do not see attacks as personal to us, we are less likely to react in unbecoming ways.
Ephesians 6:10-12
The Armor of God
"10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places."
When we see our battle is in prayer against the devils that are influencing people, we do not agonize over the attack as personal to us.
And, yes, it is demons who are influencing people to be angry at the slightest hint of correction or rebuke. The hatred for God is so strong that anything that smacks of God's power over sin, will enrage the one who hates Him and because they hate Him they hate us.
Learn the Ways of the Narcissist before Marrying One of Them
Young people should pray for God to bring their spouse. They should not look for one based on outer appearance or personality. God will only bring someone of good character which is far more valuable than physical attraction.
Narcissists go to church to find spouses because they are more likely to find empaths there to dominate.
False guilt is in the minds of lots of church goers. Young people believe they have to do what others want them to do and to be friendly to everyone. Guilting someone to spend time with them merely because they are interested works on a lot of young people. If others in the gathering are pushing a young person toward someone that God did not send, then the answer ought to be , "NO", I am not interested. Peer pressure is huge in the modern church and few people have discernment to be able to see character flaws that will be a huge problem in marriage.
I believe strongly that we should test people. If they show an interest in a young person the one who is being pursued needs to challenge the pursuer to see what comes out. A narcissist will become hurt and angry at a challenge, their response to Scripture and hard questions will often reveal what is inside.
If the pursuer is attempting to do a "personality make over" then is when it is time to walk away. There are those who would tell us how to speak, what to wear and what we should like in nearly everything. As soon as you see the narcissist working to dominate everything we do that is the time to call it quits.
These people are not interested in anyone as a person, but they are interested in making you into the person they want you to be. When we love someone for themselves we share concerns and we have honest conversations but mostly we enjoy the qualities of one another without a desire to create another person in our own image.
We are never called to be unkind to anyone, however encouraging the advances of just anyone through flirting will real in the narcissist who may be very bad for young believers.
It is very important that young people learn the signs of narcissist before they commit to marriage. If they can see the signs ahead of time they can avoid a life time of misery for themselves and their future children.
Proverbs 18:2
"A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion."
Proverbs 1:7
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction."
Proverbs 18:6
"A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating."
Proverbs 28:26
"Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered."
Proverbs 23:9
"Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the good sense of your words."
Proverbs 13:20
"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."
Fools are unwise, trouble is their name!
Narcissists go to church to find spouses because they are more likely to find empaths there to dominate.
False guilt is in the minds of lots of church goers. Young people believe they have to do what others want them to do and to be friendly to everyone. Guilting someone to spend time with them merely because they are interested works on a lot of young people. If others in the gathering are pushing a young person toward someone that God did not send, then the answer ought to be , "NO", I am not interested. Peer pressure is huge in the modern church and few people have discernment to be able to see character flaws that will be a huge problem in marriage.
I believe strongly that we should test people. If they show an interest in a young person the one who is being pursued needs to challenge the pursuer to see what comes out. A narcissist will become hurt and angry at a challenge, their response to Scripture and hard questions will often reveal what is inside.
If the pursuer is attempting to do a "personality make over" then is when it is time to walk away. There are those who would tell us how to speak, what to wear and what we should like in nearly everything. As soon as you see the narcissist working to dominate everything we do that is the time to call it quits.
These people are not interested in anyone as a person, but they are interested in making you into the person they want you to be. When we love someone for themselves we share concerns and we have honest conversations but mostly we enjoy the qualities of one another without a desire to create another person in our own image.
We are never called to be unkind to anyone, however encouraging the advances of just anyone through flirting will real in the narcissist who may be very bad for young believers.
It is very important that young people learn the signs of narcissist before they commit to marriage. If they can see the signs ahead of time they can avoid a life time of misery for themselves and their future children.
Proverbs 18:2
"A fool takes no pleasure in understanding, but only in expressing his opinion."
Proverbs 1:7
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction."
Proverbs 18:6
"A fool's lips walk into a fight, and his mouth invites a beating."
Proverbs 28:26
"Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered."
Proverbs 23:9
"Do not speak in the hearing of a fool, for he will despise the good sense of your words."
Proverbs 13:20
"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm."
Fools are unwise, trouble is their name!
A Fool Follows His Feelings
As I have been repeating a lot lately, we are living in a world that is irrational. "Feelings are facts" to foolish people. Facts are denied when the feelings are preferred to the facts.
When feelings are preferred over rational and reasonable facts in the culture we know we are nearing the end of our country and the end of time.
The devil is causing people to believe many things that are not true. He works on the feelings of those who are not seeking Christ.
When our feelings, the bent of the culture and family take priority over facts and rational reasoning to determine truth, we are lost forever never to return.
We have many people calling good bad and bad good. We cannot expect people to embrace or love those who have the audacity to speak truth when they are busy leaning hard into their feelings.
When the devil manipulates feelings in people they tend to choose to believe the feelings are telling them something they need to pay attention to, rather than driving them to dismiss the feelings and evaluate what just happened.
I remember a friend telling me that she chastised a little neighbor boy for doing something naughty at her home. The little boy listened to the correction and then retorted with something profound. He said; "you made my feelings cry."
Notice that the little boy didn't feel ashamed or even mention what he did, it was that the adult had made him feel bad, so whatever was wrong was the adult's fault for his feelings. Never mind that the little boy had been naughty.
There are many adults walking around today who are saying; "you made me feel bad", while refusing to admit they have done something wrong. This is why so many criminals in jail FEEL and CLAIM they are not guilty. Those in jail do not believe they deserve to be punished because the authorities and the police that arrested them "made them feel bad."
Narcissists always have a good reason for what they do and its always someone else's fault.
Welcome to our world of "feelings over substance" and "feelings over facts."
Proverbs 29:10-12 "…10 Men of bloodshed hate a blameless man, but the upright care for his life. 11 A fool vents all his anger, but a wise man holds it back. 12 If a ruler listens to lies, all his officials will be wicked."
Proverbs 29:11-13
11 A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back.
12 If a ruler pays attention to falsehood, All his ministers become wicked."
When feelings are preferred over rational and reasonable facts in the culture we know we are nearing the end of our country and the end of time.
The devil is causing people to believe many things that are not true. He works on the feelings of those who are not seeking Christ.
When our feelings, the bent of the culture and family take priority over facts and rational reasoning to determine truth, we are lost forever never to return.
We have many people calling good bad and bad good. We cannot expect people to embrace or love those who have the audacity to speak truth when they are busy leaning hard into their feelings.
When the devil manipulates feelings in people they tend to choose to believe the feelings are telling them something they need to pay attention to, rather than driving them to dismiss the feelings and evaluate what just happened.
I remember a friend telling me that she chastised a little neighbor boy for doing something naughty at her home. The little boy listened to the correction and then retorted with something profound. He said; "you made my feelings cry."
Notice that the little boy didn't feel ashamed or even mention what he did, it was that the adult had made him feel bad, so whatever was wrong was the adult's fault for his feelings. Never mind that the little boy had been naughty.
There are many adults walking around today who are saying; "you made me feel bad", while refusing to admit they have done something wrong. This is why so many criminals in jail FEEL and CLAIM they are not guilty. Those in jail do not believe they deserve to be punished because the authorities and the police that arrested them "made them feel bad."
Narcissists always have a good reason for what they do and its always someone else's fault.
Welcome to our world of "feelings over substance" and "feelings over facts."
Proverbs 29:10-12 "…10 Men of bloodshed hate a blameless man, but the upright care for his life. 11 A fool vents all his anger, but a wise man holds it back. 12 If a ruler listens to lies, all his officials will be wicked."
Proverbs 29:11-13
11 A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back.
12 If a ruler pays attention to falsehood, All his ministers become wicked."
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