If you dare to disagree with a narcissist you automatically become their enemy. If narcissism comes in the form of a cult there will be intense pressure placed on those who choose to think for themselves. There will be a sort of "group think" in which those who do not comply to the group will be treated as an outsider and with contempt.
Even though the target of narcissism does not nag or use demeaning language to disagree with the narcissist they will be accused of it anyway. Often the narcissist accuses their target of the things the narcissist is doing and their targets are not doing.
Galatians 4:16-17 "…15 What then has become of your blessing? For I can testify that, if it were possible, you would have torn out your eyes and given them to me. 16 Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth? 17 Those people are zealous for you, but not in a good way. Instead, they want to isolate you from us, so that you may be zealous for them."
How quickly the narcissist goes from "love bombing" to "discard" merely because you have begun evaluating everything and expressing concerns.
We can usually see whether a friendship was an authentic one or manipulation to gain followers. The authentic friendship listens to us, allows us to have our own opinions, and even supports what we have decided for ourselves.
The inauthentic relationship only treats us respectfully and with love if we are agreeing with them. The minute we have expressed a difference we have become the enemy as God spoke of in Galatians. The narcissist is not capable of love, they only have the pretense of love that goes away at the slightest perceived provocation. A perceived provocation is what they believe is a personal attack on them if we do not fall in line with them.
I know this can hurt, but count it joy when you have discovered the nature of your friendship. We do not want friendships that are based on walking on eggshells or becoming like someone else merely to be treated well by them.
There are people who will treat us respectfully and with kindness no matter our disagreements. No one can maintain a friendship with someone who continually treats us with disrespect, merely because we do not think the same way they think.
As born-again believers we desire friendships that have the mind of Christ. Everything they think and do is based on the Word of God. This does not mean everyone is perfect or thinks the way they should, however, it does mean when they disagree or think differently there is still kindness and respect shown.
John 13:34-35…34 A new commandment I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you also must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are My disciples if you love one another.”
What does love look like: Here it is!!!
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
4 Love is patient, love is kind, it is not jealous; love does not brag, it is not arrogant.
5 It does not act disgracefully, it does not seek its own benefit; it is not provoked, does not keep an account of a wrong suffered,
6 it does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth;
7 it keeps every confidence, it believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
