If people would be honest they might realize they are more worried about losing friends and family than they are about hurt feelings. When we tell the truth in the mildest terms, many will become angry, raging, excluding us from family and gossiping behind our backs to cause division and chase away any friends we have left.
If this has been your experience then you are in good company. Christ and all the apostles were ill treated in this way. I notice something profound about the lives of the apostles, they don't speak of extended family, or rarely mention them.
It is interesting that extended family will make sure they make it to the birthday parties and ball games of those they love, but have no interest in those that are following hard after Christ.
In fact, most "Christians" I encounter today are embarrassed at the mention of the name of Christ outside the church building and by anyone but the pastor in the pulpit.
When our Christianity is based on how many times we go to a building called a "church" and whether or not we attend the potluck, perhaps it's not Christianity at all but traditions of men.
Mark 7:13 "13 Thus you nullify the word of God by the tradition you have handed down. And you do so” in many such matters."
When the "pastor" is the one perceived to have the wisdom and everyone under him must follow him, then those under him cannot be following Christ. We cannot follow a man and Christ too, we must choose.
The Holy Spirit lives in every believer, every believer has wisdom and calling from Him, no one is to be above another. There are leaders in the gathering but not one, several and they lead by the way that they serve in continually pointing us to Christ while encouraging us to use our Spiritual gifts.
Gifts are not assigned by man, they are given by the Holy Spirit and we are commanded to obey Christ while using our gifts. We may not always know what our gift is, but if it is from Christ we will be using it, whether we know it or not.
1 Corinthians 14:1 "1 Earnestly pursue love and eagerly desire spiritual gifts, especially the gift of prophecy. "
Don't worry about discovering your gift, just desire to be used of God and He will develop in you the gift He wants you to have. He will use us where He wants us and we will be compelled to do His Will, we will love what He has given us. I've never met anyone with a gift who forced themselves because they didn't enjoy it. We do enjoy doing what God has given us to do, it becomes a very part of our being, we cannot not do it.
John 16:13-14 "13 However, when the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth. For He will not speak on His own, but He will speak what He hears, and He will declare to you what is to come. 14 He will glorify Me by taking from what is Mine and disclosing it to you.…"
We cannot be used of God if we fear losing friends and family. We must be so dedicated to Christ that displeasing Him becomes more disturbing to us than anything we might lose.
Galatians 1:9-11 "…9 As we have said before, so now I say again: If anyone is preaching to you a gospel contrary to the one you embraced, let him be under a divine curse! 10 Am I now seeking the approval of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ. 11 For I certify to you, brothers, that the gospel I preached is not devised by man."
