People are desturbed not by the things that happen to them but by the view they have of those things. When we trust Christ we are not shaken by what happens to us.
Romans 8:28
"28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose."
Their disrespect does not have to affect our emotional state, we can remain calm when we know this about them.
If we self-reflect often to make sure we are walking upright then we will not be blind-sided by those who are disrespectful.
2 Corinthians 13:5 "5Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Can’t you see for yourselves that Jesus Christ is in you— unless you actually fail the test? "
1 Corinthians 11:28
"Each one must examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup."
Notice too that the quality of our thoughts determines the quality of our actions. Those who are kind and loving on the inside will not be rude and unkind on the outside. If someone is chronically rude and superior acting then we know they have arrogance and ruthlessness on the inside.
Loving and kind people are always striving to improve our thoughts and actions. The joyfulness of our lives focused on Christ determines the quality of our thoughts. Do those thoughts mesh with the principles of Christ or are they determined by the world?
If we are treated disrespectfully we can examine ourselves to see if we did something or said something worthy of the disrespect. We can do this without being devastated by the need to self-reflect. We can logically and unemotionally face the possibility that we need to correct something. It is pride that prevents people from freely self-reflecting to improve their character.
We cannot change another person, but we can change ourselves through prayer and the desire to be taught and changed by Christ.
We must be objective about ourselves without emotions in order to grow in holiness. Our responses must be based on rational judgment rather than emotional responses.
This process helps us learn from situations while becoming more aware of the teachings of life promoting personal growth and wisdom. Those who refuse to examine themselves cannot grow, they remain spiritual and emotional infants.
When we become angry instead of self-reflecting we have developed and increased a bad habit of angst that will not go away until there is repentance.
Poor decisions come from a lack of self-control and anger comes from a self-willed position of superiority. We unnecessarily suffer from this stubborn stance as well as making others suffer from our own impulsive fierce raging.
Galatians 5:22-23 - "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."
It is vital that when we are disrespected we remember that it isn't personal to us, it is a reaction of the one who disrepects because of the fear that is inside of them. They fear losing control over others, they fear not being loved because they do not love others.
We need to treat others with the respect they did not show us.
Luke 6:27-28 "27But to those of you who will listen, I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, 28bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. "
We must remain dignified even if no one else does. Our dignity is not based on how others treat us and we don't have to respond to them the way they did to us.
Defensiveness shows a weakness of character. When we know our character is not based on what others think of us we can detach from the nasty reactions of weak people and love them anyway, the way they don't love us. This is not to say we become good friends, but life is full of circumstances in which we must be in the company of unkind and unloving people. We cannot allow them to turn us into them.
We are observers in life learning wonderful lessons from God when we watch actions and reactions without responding according to our feelings.
Meditate constantly on what is right from God's Word, it will be our strength through everything we endure in this world. We learn great lessons as if in a boot camp, that make us strong and impervious to attacks of the enemy.
Let us develop courage instead of fear and reaction. We must be reasonable, rational, and calm, this allows us to be unaffected by what comes at us.
Ephesians 6:10-18
The Armor of God
10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might.
11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.
12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
13 Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist on the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm. 14 Stand firm therefore, having belted your waist with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,
15 and having strapped on your feet the preparation of the gospel of peace;
16 in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.
17 And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God."
By focusing on the principles of Christ and what He wants us to be we can avoid being influenced by our own emotions while maintaining our dignity as we grow spiritually and emotionally.
We must accept what we cannot change. We cannot change a disrespectful person but we can refuse to become like them by focusing on God's principles for our lives.
We must learn to refuse to grieve over those who hate us and rejoice for all that God has done for us.
Romans 12:12
"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."
Do not take seriously those things that are foolishly attempting to cause anger in us. Perhaps even laughing at the devil when he uses people to demean us.
Setting clear boundaries with people in this out-of-control world will help us discern who is able to be reached with the truth and who is not, the Holy Spirit will help us with this.
Remain calm as you tell the rude person what they did wrong and how they must treat you. If they refuse to listen and enjoy their disrespect of you then you are free to exclude them from your lives.
Those who are self-absorbed are not able to look more deeply into the other person in front of them. They only see their own point of view and are enraged if it is not accepted, or even if there is a desire to have a deeper conversation about the matter.
Self-absorbed people never ask you to explain your point of view. They do not think deeply about anything because they live by their feelings and defending those feelings comes before everything else. Reason and rational discussion is not in the mind of the self-absorbed person.
These people do not learn or grow emotionally or spiritually, they walk around like bratty six-year-olds refusing to hear instructions or correction.
Correcting a self-absorbed person is like beating your head against a brick wall expecting the wall to crack, it's only the head that cracks.
Disrespect is clearly the ignorance of the one who is insolent, and childlike in their thinking and response to minor things.
Proverbs 18:1-3 "1 He who isolates himself pursues selfish desires; he rebels against all sound judgment. 2 A fool does not delight in understanding, but only in airing his opinions. 3 With a wicked man comes contempt as well, and shame is accompanied by disgrace.…"
Proverbs 29:8-10 "…8 Mockers inflame a city, but the wise turn away anger. 9 If a wise man goes to court with a fool, there will be raving and laughing with no resolution. 10 Men of bloodshed hate a blameless man, but the upright care for his life.…"
Let's become strong while disallowing others to determine our responses by becoming Christ-like no matter what anyone else is doing.
