When we realize we are not commanded to change a person's heart, then we will not be fixated on techniques to manipulate them to agree with us.
We cannot change anyone's heart, we can only bring the message and they will respond to the Holy Spirit with whats in their own heart.
1 Corinthians 3:6-8
"6 I planted, Apollos watered, but God was causing the growth. 7 So then neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but God who causes the growth. 8 Now he who plants and he who waters are one; but each will receive his own reward according to his own labor."
We depend on the Holy Spirit to speak through us His way and leave it there.
Self reflection to improve should be a normal course for the believer. The non-believer does it to progress in business or get along in the culture but its not authentic, its to gain some worldly goods or position. For the believer the self reflection has to do with loving God and becoming more holy and useful!
Alan Brayshaw said this:
" Do Not Take Your Last Breath with a Hard Heart,." Examine Yourself ,."
Covert narcissism is like this! They present a false persona to those in church while acting terrible in the home. If the people in the home were to tell on them in the church, those in the church would not believe the victim because all they ever see is the friendly person they see once a week for two hours.
This is why the Catholic church got away with all the abuse for so many years. Those who like someone will minimize the victim to protect the abuser.
"The Sanhedrin did't attack Jesus for what He was saying but they attacked Him for saying it." Jacob Prasch
