In a conversation recently with a young woman we discussed the current state of our culture in reference to young people who are living together without the benefit of marriage. Even those who attend church are participating in this sin and their friends and family who would not do it themselves are approving of it.
Ephesians 5:3 "But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints;"
Colossians 3:5 "Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry."
Revelation 17:2 ""with whom the kings of the earth committed fornication and the inhabitants of the earth were made drunk with the wine of her fornication."
We, as a culture have "become drunk with the wine of fornication." Those who do not do these things, but accept them, participate in the sin of others who live this way.
Now that we have seen the Word of God on this subject, perhaps we should look at the practical, human side of indulging in this sin. There is a reason God said not to do it. He built into our being to be committed to one another, becoming one flesh for life.
When we violate this principle we bring damage and brokenness to the family. Children are insecure and angry in these relationships, they never know when an authority figure will abandon them, or if they are even loved. Children need two parents who belong to them, fully.
Ephesians 6:4 "And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord."
It has been said that if two people live together they will find out if they are compatible for marriage and avoid a divorce if they get married. According to the statistics the divorce rate among those who have lived together first, is higher than those who did not live together before marriage.
There is a very good reason why divorce would be higher for those who have lived together first, it is very simple; the attitude makes or breaks a relationship. If we go into a marriage with the attitude that we can just dissolve the relationship if it doesn't make us happy, we display a lack of love and deep concern for the other person. The objective becomes, "what will I get out of this" rather than "how can I be an asset to the other person. In short....selfishness!
When two people go into marriage expecting to work hard to be what they should be and resolving to make the marriage work no matter what, these are the people who can make it in marriage. They go into the relationship determined to love the other person and meet their needs rather than just grabbing for themselves.
I wish that young people will see what "living together" really is and that is an attitude that "if I get tired of you, you mean so little to me that I want the option to dump you."
We had a saying when I was young, "if a man asks you to sleep with him before marriage, he doesn't love you." Men will say to young girls "if you love me you will let me." The answer ladies to these men should be, "you are not the man for me, if you would ask me to violate my own conscience and give to you something as precious as virginity, then you don't love me, hit the road Jack."
God shows us what love is in His very dying on the cross. He gave of Himself for others before we loved Him, while we were yet sinners. He is our example for marriage.
This constant hopping in and out of relationships in dating and divorce and remarriage destroys children and the culture, we are well on the road to poverty as a nation because we have broken the strongest threads of a culture, the marriage and family.
May we repent as a nation and may the apostate church repent from accepting this base standard for our young people.
