Beware of believing the testimony of any angry person. When someone is jealous, angry and contemptuous toward another person it is very likely they will not have a true testimony of the events they relay.
Those who are bitter and angry tell lots of lies. Everything they speak against others is colored by their own need to be elevated above others.
Proverbs 22:24
"Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man,"
Jealous and angry people are always on the verge of an explosion, allowing their rage to take over when they feel they have lost control through the exposure of their own hate and sinful behavior.
Ecclesiastes 7:9
"Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the bosom of fools."
Anger is not something that arises quickly, it is something that lives in the heart of an angry person all the time, looming beneath the surface ready for emerging rage at the slightest provocation. Even if the there was no provocation mere disagreement will cause the anger to gush forth.
Proverbs 15:18
"A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention."
It has been my observation that narcissists rarely smile unless they are getting what they want. It is because there is no depth of joy in them.
Those who are joyful do not rage at disagreements. They do not look sad in their countenance all the time as do those who have no joy.
Narcissists spend most of their time judging others for small minor things, blowing them into mountains in order to elevate themselves above those for whom they have contempt.
They also judge the righteous for standing for their own principles and boundaries. With every excuse they twist the Bible, using it as a battering ram as they lie against the word of God in their attempt to control others who rebuke them.
There was a woman who was told by family members that they were all going to watch a movie she could not watch. In order to watch this movie she would be violating her own principles and sensibilities.
The family wanted her to watch it with them, she didn't want to but was pressured so she sat in the room with them. Every time the Lord's name was taken in vain she would speak up and say; "that is wicked to take the Lord's name in vain." She felt justified in speaking up each time because she could not stand to hear it and the people in the room claimed to be Christians. The Lord's name in vain was only one of the words, there were several other filthy words in that film. In the minds of these narcissists who claimed to be Christian, she had ruined their good time by pointing out blasphemy.
The husband of this woman said nothing, to be accepted by the others in the room. They all watched, they all ignored the anguished comments of the mother and later gave her the silent treatment for not allowing them to watch the movie without judgement.
Later this poor woman was chastised by her foolish daughter on the need to let the husband be the leader even when he chose to pressure her to do something that violated her conscience.
You see, they all wanted to watch that evil movie and they wanted the mother to validate their sinful act. Because the mother would not indulge by remaining silent they punished her with removing love from her. The husband was lavished with kindness and love for his acceptance of them while the mother was treated contemptuously for standing for God's principles.
This was a constant treatment of this woman all her life from these so called "Christians" for daring to keep God's principles and her own boundaries.
This is the state of our modern Christianity. The evil is enjoyed and the righteous is punished. We see this all the time, the parents that are accepting of every kind of evil in their children's lives are loved and appreciated while the parents that stand for Christ are treated shamefully for their convictions and standards according to the word of God.
Proverbs 29:22
"A man of wrath stirs up strife, and one given to anger causes much transgression."
When you are treated shamefully for your convictions do not allow it to control you in any way. Keep obeying God and let Him handle those who persecute you.
James 1:2-4 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
"2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, 3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. 4 And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."
Our life is not dependent on the love of others, it is dependent on the love of Christ Who lives in us.
Christ loves our obedience to Him, it matters not what anyone else thinks of us.
Romans 5:3-5 "…3 Not only that, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out His love into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us.…"
Monday, October 28, 2019
Woman and Her Calling!
Many years ago the Lord showed me what the duties of the wife were, I took them very seriously with great joy at the sense of purpose and accomplishment. I loved my job!
Yes, for 48 years of marriage God showed me from the very beginning that my job was the home front and my husband's was the work place. If my job is done correctly then it will be finished for the day when he arrives home so that he does not have to do anything that I am capable of doing myself.
Proverbs 31:10-31 "An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13 She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
14 She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
15 She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
18 She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
26 She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
29 “Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
31 Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates."
Not every woman will do exactly the things I did but if she takes care of the needs of her husband the food and the household she will be fulfilling this passage.
Yes, for 48 years of marriage God showed me from the very beginning that my job was the home front and my husband's was the work place. If my job is done correctly then it will be finished for the day when he arrives home so that he does not have to do anything that I am capable of doing myself.
I also believed in having a meal on the table ready to eat so that he didn't have to wait. I didn't want my husband to have the burden of home as wells a the work place too.
I believed in this so strongly that I did yard work, and even painting rooms and the outside of our houses. The other reason is that I hated unfinished projects and loved the challenge of making things stay nice.
My husband was always grateful that he could come and relax without more home work to do. He also enjoyed sitting down to a meal without having to wait for it. He never demanded anything of me, but was was happy that I did things this way.
Not every woman will do the painting and the yard work but if they do the household chores as well as food preparation they are obeying God.
Not every woman will do the painting and the yard work but if they do the household chores as well as food preparation they are obeying God.
The woman even provides the clothes for her husband as well as the clothes for the entire household. The woman's job in the home is varied and busy, she is creative as well as knowledgeable in the things of the Lord to be able to instruct others. She has no time for silliness and drama.
There were meals to be planned so that there was always a menu for the month. Every month there was the shopping for the items on the menu. Organization was a big part of the homemaking job.
Often I made decisions for the household without consulting my husband, he didn't want to have to make these decisions as well as not having time to spend doing it.
There were times when my husband needed help with his volunteer activities and even when he sat in the city gates (that is the legislature) he enlisted me to help with mailings, deliveries and speeches on his behalf.
It would be wrong to instruct younger woman to do this job if I had not already done it for myself for many years. We should never speak about what others should do if we have not done what we are teaching others, that would be hypocrisy.
Today we live in a world full of younger people who are deeply angry when they are instructed or corrected. They believe they know about things they have never experienced or completed themselves.
There are those who believe they can instruct others about marriage who never completed their marriages. I was actually instructed one time many years ago about submission to a husband by a woman who had been married only a year, while I had been married 30 years. It is disrespectful and foolish to instruct someone who has worked at something longer than you have.
I did these things because I love God, because I love my husband and because I loved my children. God placed in me early on the joy of living out His principles as described in Proverbs 31. Of course I didn't do it perfectly, it was not always easy, but I think that any woman with all her flaws and warts can say "I finished the race", when they have lived out their life obeying God. I did have great joy doing what I believed God wanted for me.
"I finished the race" refers to when Paul was at the end of his life and was ready to pass into eternity. God wants us to be able to look back and know that we did what we were called to do, no matter the false accusations or mockings of others, we persevered and came to the end of our lives full of gratitude for what God did in us through everything.
There will be those who mock, who claim you didn't do what you did, gossiping that you were all wrong or foolish for doing what God has called you to do. Our joy does not come from the praise of man but from the tenderness and love of Christ Who lives in us.
Never look to man for validation for doing what is right. Only look to Christ for everything, the constant criticism of man will have no effect when we are with Christ.
Proverbs 31:10-31 "An excellent wife, who can find?
For her worth is far above jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
And he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
13 She looks for wool and flax
And works with her hands in delight.
14 She is like merchant ships;
She brings her food from afar.
15 She rises also while it is still night
And gives food to her household
And portions to her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
From her earnings she plants a vineyard.
17 She girds herself with strength
And makes her arms strong.
18 She senses that her gain is good;
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She stretches out her hands to the distaff,
And her hands grasp the spindle.
20 She extends her hand to the poor,
And she stretches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household,
For all her household are clothed with scarlet.
22 She makes coverings for herself;
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies belts to the tradesmen.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she smiles at the future.
26 She opens her mouth in wisdom,
And the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and bless her;
Her husband also, and he praises her, saying:
29 “Many daughters have done nobly,
But you excel them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain,
But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.
31 Give her the product of her hands,
And let her works praise her in the gates."
Not every woman will do exactly the things I did but if she takes care of the needs of her husband the food and the household she will be fulfilling this passage.
Here's the thing, the woman who resolves to do this will have to be deeply dedicated to her job as given to her by God to withstand the naysayers who want to negate her calling. She will have to be strong to refuse to listen to those who will claim she didn't or shouldn't do what she really did. There will be no support from the world or family, but she does not need it because her support and strength comes from Christ. Hallelujah
Sunday, October 27, 2019
Know God by Knowing His Principles
Knowing God's word so well that if it were taken from you, you would still know all the principles in it to be able to explain them to someone else even without a Bible.
When we were children we rode our bikes all over the valley, continually on them every day for years. After we grew up we may not have ridden our bikes anymore as busy adults, but when we got back on a bike after many years of being off there was no need to think about how to do it, we just get back on and take off as though it had only been a few days since we rode it last.
When we are so well versed in the principles of God through continual reading and prayer for many years we will never forget them.
There are some people who like to memorize the Bible. This can be a good thing but it is far more valuable to know in the depth of our being the principles than just the words on the surface. When we know the words without the depth of understanding we have little wisdom from that.
However, when we know the deep principles well having been enlightened by God, we might forget the words but we will never forget the principles. Even able to express the principles flawlessly in our own words but every bit the meaning God intended.
God said, "hide my word away in your heart." This did not have to do with memorization, it had to do with knowing so well His principles that forgetting the exact words would not be a threat to us, because the principles of God stand firm in any language. The words we memorize in English will not help us if we pick up a Bible written in another language. We cannot read that language so the words mean nothing. But the principles of God transcend every language, they are not in a "language" they are a heart attitude, a full measure of truth that can be known in any language.
It is far more important to understand the principles that will remain in us even if our Bibles are taken away.
Memorize if you like to, but better yet know the principles so well that there is automatic adherence to truth without having to search our brains for answers. When we know His principles in the Bible so deeply we dream in them, we will never forget them.
Anyone can memorize words, but when the words are forgotten without the understanding the meaning dissolves. If we have the meaning and understanding, even if the words are removed we know truth, it will never leave us.
Psalm 119:10-12 "…10 With all my heart I have sought You; do not let me stray from Your commandments. 11 I have hidden Your word in my heart that I might not sin against You. 12 Blessed are You, O LORD; teach me Your statutes."
Seek God with all your heart and He will bring the understanding.
When we were children we rode our bikes all over the valley, continually on them every day for years. After we grew up we may not have ridden our bikes anymore as busy adults, but when we got back on a bike after many years of being off there was no need to think about how to do it, we just get back on and take off as though it had only been a few days since we rode it last.
When we are so well versed in the principles of God through continual reading and prayer for many years we will never forget them.
There are some people who like to memorize the Bible. This can be a good thing but it is far more valuable to know in the depth of our being the principles than just the words on the surface. When we know the words without the depth of understanding we have little wisdom from that.
However, when we know the deep principles well having been enlightened by God, we might forget the words but we will never forget the principles. Even able to express the principles flawlessly in our own words but every bit the meaning God intended.
God said, "hide my word away in your heart." This did not have to do with memorization, it had to do with knowing so well His principles that forgetting the exact words would not be a threat to us, because the principles of God stand firm in any language. The words we memorize in English will not help us if we pick up a Bible written in another language. We cannot read that language so the words mean nothing. But the principles of God transcend every language, they are not in a "language" they are a heart attitude, a full measure of truth that can be known in any language.
It is far more important to understand the principles that will remain in us even if our Bibles are taken away.
Memorize if you like to, but better yet know the principles so well that there is automatic adherence to truth without having to search our brains for answers. When we know His principles in the Bible so deeply we dream in them, we will never forget them.
Anyone can memorize words, but when the words are forgotten without the understanding the meaning dissolves. If we have the meaning and understanding, even if the words are removed we know truth, it will never leave us.
Psalm 119:10-12 "…10 With all my heart I have sought You; do not let me stray from Your commandments. 11 I have hidden Your word in my heart that I might not sin against You. 12 Blessed are You, O LORD; teach me Your statutes."
Seek God with all your heart and He will bring the understanding.
In Control or Controlling?
Being the person in control does not equate to being "controlling."
When we are in control we are guiding others without micro managing them.
Those who micro manage others are actually out of control. They do not feel they can trust anyone else to be intelligent enough to handle their own area of expertise.
In fact a controller usually has the false belief that they know everything about everything. They have experts on their team but do not recognize that those experts know more than they do about their particular field of expertise.
When I hire a plumber to come to my home to fix a problem I expect him to know how to do his job. I tell him the need and walk away to leave the final decisions for the job up to the plumber.
A man is the head of the household but he is not the one who is expert over all areas of managing that household. The woman, according to Proverbs 31 was given the job of household manager by God, she is to do that job according to the principles of God. The man has no business dictating or controlling her job.
Of course the man makes suggestions and discusses the major things with his wife so that she can do her job according to the mutual desires and needs of the household.
Husbands are not to bark orders at their wife as though she is a paid employee who could be fired for insubordination. Husbands are to live with their wives in understanding and respect.
Respect is not just for the husband on the part of the wife, it is also required in God's word that the man respect the needs and abilities of the wife. Honor and respect toward the wife is a command of God.
Sadly there are those in the homeschool movement who are teaching that only the man is to be honored and respected. This is false and damaging to a marriage.
1 Peter 3:7-8 "7 Husbands, in the same way, treat your wives with consideration as a delicate vessel, and with honor as fellow heirs of the gracious gift of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. 8 Finally, all of you, be like-minded and sympathetic, love as brothers, be tender-hearted and humble.…"
God calls all believers to be mutually submissive one to another.
Ephesians 5:21-6:4
"21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God."
When we are in control we are guiding others without micro managing them.
Those who micro manage others are actually out of control. They do not feel they can trust anyone else to be intelligent enough to handle their own area of expertise.
In fact a controller usually has the false belief that they know everything about everything. They have experts on their team but do not recognize that those experts know more than they do about their particular field of expertise.
When I hire a plumber to come to my home to fix a problem I expect him to know how to do his job. I tell him the need and walk away to leave the final decisions for the job up to the plumber.
A man is the head of the household but he is not the one who is expert over all areas of managing that household. The woman, according to Proverbs 31 was given the job of household manager by God, she is to do that job according to the principles of God. The man has no business dictating or controlling her job.
Of course the man makes suggestions and discusses the major things with his wife so that she can do her job according to the mutual desires and needs of the household.
Husbands are not to bark orders at their wife as though she is a paid employee who could be fired for insubordination. Husbands are to live with their wives in understanding and respect.
Respect is not just for the husband on the part of the wife, it is also required in God's word that the man respect the needs and abilities of the wife. Honor and respect toward the wife is a command of God.
Sadly there are those in the homeschool movement who are teaching that only the man is to be honored and respected. This is false and damaging to a marriage.
1 Peter 3:7-8 "7 Husbands, in the same way, treat your wives with consideration as a delicate vessel, and with honor as fellow heirs of the gracious gift of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered. 8 Finally, all of you, be like-minded and sympathetic, love as brothers, be tender-hearted and humble.…"
God calls all believers to be mutually submissive one to another.
Ephesians 5:21-6:4
"21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God."
Saturday, October 26, 2019
Legal Separation Vs Divorce?
There is no reason to divorce however there can be reasons for separation for abuse. There is a law on the book in the United States that says a couple can get a legal separation without divorce that works the same way divorce does in terms of financial support. It is a permanent separation without the possibility of remarriage. It allows for a couple to have financial support without having to live together.
Apparently this law was a result of an answer to abuse without promoting divorce and the couple can never remarry if they take this legal action. This fits with the Bible in matters of abuse or adultery when a spouse will not stop the adultery.
I have noticed that when a couple divorces their intent is to be able to remarry against God's will. Once a remarriage happens there is very little chance there will be a reconciliation. But in a situation like the "legal separation" the couple will not be able to marry anyone else, there is a better chance of reconciliation.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11 "…10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. "
Apparently this law was a result of an answer to abuse without promoting divorce and the couple can never remarry if they take this legal action. This fits with the Bible in matters of abuse or adultery when a spouse will not stop the adultery.
I have noticed that when a couple divorces their intent is to be able to remarry against God's will. Once a remarriage happens there is very little chance there will be a reconciliation. But in a situation like the "legal separation" the couple will not be able to marry anyone else, there is a better chance of reconciliation.
1 Corinthians 7:10-11 "…10 To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband. 11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife. "
Pray and Do What You Must
Wife or husband abuse is sin, it is against the law of man and of God, therefore it is best to alert the authorities when it happens. Defending one's self from an abuser is self defense, never feel bad if you have to do this.
Luke 22:36 “He said to them, “But now let the one who has a moneybag take it, and likewise a knapsack. And let the one who has no sword sell his cloak and buy one.”
Matthew 10:34 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.”
Titus 3:10
"As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him,"
Romans 13:1-14
"Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Would you have no fear of the one who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval, for he is God's servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God's wrath on the wrongdoer. Therefore one must be in subjection, not only to avoid God's wrath but also for the sake of conscience. ..."
Luke 22:36 “He said to them, “But now let the one who has a moneybag take it, and likewise a knapsack. And let the one who has no sword sell his cloak and buy one.”
Matthew 10:34 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword.”
Titus 3:10
"As for a person who stirs up division, after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him,"
Romans 13:1-14
"Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God. Therefore whoever resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment. For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Would you have no fear of the one who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval, for he is God's servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain. For he is the servant of God, an avenger who carries out God's wrath on the wrongdoer. Therefore one must be in subjection, not only to avoid God's wrath but also for the sake of conscience. ..."
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