They were taught by extended family and the schools they attended that their mother and father were wrong and to be dismissed as stupid and foolish. Those they married were pampered all their lives, continually praised by family while having few, if any, rules. We see the same rebellion in the hearts of their parents.
I have noticed that these same people refuse instruction from anyone. They really believe they know it all and everything they do should be admired and accepted by anyone they allow in their lives. Of course this leaves out believers in Christ, who will never be a member of the "in crowd."
I praise God for this because it has allowed believers to focus entirely on Christ, those who love Him and new people who do not yet know Him. When being accepted by family is more important than living for Christ, we have idols in our lives, while being prevented from moving forward to new growing experiences, able too then to share the gospel with others who may be open to hearing.
When we see that we cannot live and speak freely our convictions, then it is time to move on. There are so many other wonderful experiences outside of family that we miss if we remain in these contentious and demeaning circumstances.
I write about this because there are many of you out there who are perplexed and confused by demeaning and dismissive treatment you have received. You cannot figure out what is wrong and they won't tell you, even when asked.
My guess is that there really isn't anything they can put their finger on, except the petty things contrived in their own minds. Really they are attempting to make us look bad when we did nothing to warrant this treatment. It is God they are in rebellion against, not us. When we can remember this, we can remain forthright, honest and bold as we continue on for the Lord.
If someone would like to challenge me on being so open on facebook about this, keep in mind that the story of Absalom, David's son is recorded in the Bible for all to see down through the ages, it has not been hidden for the sake of false family unity. There is the account of Job's children who were all killed while partying. Lot's sins with his daughters after the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah is described in the Word. Solomon's life of opulence and idolatry is recorded forever in the Bible, along with almost all the lives of the patriarchs.
God is not interested in continual praise for good works, but in showing that every man is sinful, in need of repentance and forgiveness. No man is innocent and no man can go a lifetime without chastisement or a need for brokenness over their sin.
It is not important to tell all the details all the time, but sometimes it is important to tell the truth for the sake of learning and encouragement for others. If we find someone becoming angry at our openness, perhaps these are people who are more concerned about appearances than they are about righteousness.
When someone becomes angry over being exposed then there is still rebellion in their heart. If someone is ashamed and repentant then they are on the road to cleansing and healing, there is no better place to be.
Ephesians 5:11 "11 Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but instead even expose them; "
It is wicked to share the details of sin in the lives of people who have repented. However it is not wrong or sinful to expose the sin of those who remain in their sin. Not only should we expose it, to warn others, but when there has been a change, repentance, then we need to tell about that too.
The key to all of this is that it is important for people to see openness, heartache and healing, to pray, and then to see the transformation in the one who was healed because they confessed and turned. Anyone who wants to hide is not ready for confession and cleansing.
Perhaps often we hide the sins of family members because we are concerned about how others will think of us or that the one exposed will hate us. Neither of those things is a valid reason to protect the sinful person. It is better to tell the truth, pray for salvation and then glory in what God does in hearts. That way we see both circumstances, we see the evil so as not to be influenced by it and then we see a miracle of God in the changing of a heart.
Hiding is the devil's way not God's. If we can hide, we can pretend, there is no need to seek change or healing, we can keep on being wicked without any consequences or accountability.
Psalm 64:2 "Hide me from the secret counsel of evildoers, From the tumult of those who do iniquity,"
Luke 12:2 "Nothing is covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known."
Ephesians 4:25 "Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another."
James 5:16 "Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working."
We cannot confess our sins without revealing them. We cannot pray when we have no knowledge of the need for prayer. We cannot be cleansed and grow without a sense of sadness that we offended God and the accompanying confession.
A broken heart over sin will always bring openness and confession. Those who hide remain in their sin, without spiritual growth only to continue a hardening of the heart.
Ephesians 4:18
"They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart."
Matthew 13:14-15 "Indeed, in their case the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled that says: “‘You will indeed hear but never understand, and you will indeed see but never perceive. For this people's heart has grown dull, and with their ears they can barely hear, and their eyes they have closed, lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears and understand with their heart and turn, and I would heal them.’"
Proverbs 28:13-14 "Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy. Blessed is the one who fears the Lord always, but whoever hardens his heart will fall into calamity."
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