It is very hard for emotionally and verbally abused children to listen to outsiders praise the very people that are abusing them.
Anyone can get the outside world to love them, judge them as great people, all that is needed is big smiles, lots of joking and pats on the back. Most people are vulnerable to this sort of manipulation.
There are many who get angry when we judge something a politician or famous person does or the way they live, however these same people feel free to judge someone as good and wonderful when they really know nothing about them except the one or two public appearances they have observed.
Any family can dress up, get in a picture and smile, that is not an indication of the condition of the family. There is a lot of pretense that has invaded our world. As long as someone can display a persona for the public that is aesthetically pleasing, everyone loves to pretend that image is the reality.
In my humble opinion it is better not to judge anyone as bad or good without strong evidence of what we are saying. Notice I didn't say we shouldn't judge, judging is a part of every day life if we are to protect ourselves from predators. We are to judge when we have enough information and be cautious when we don't know a person.
We can never judge anyone based on a photo or one or two things we see them doing. We must know the lifestyle of someone along with many other encounters to be able to determine the truth. It's called discernment, and it is always based on God's truth, not our emotions.
Most people are happy to judge good things about anyone, but they refuse to admit the ugly sin they see. Assuming someone is a good person based on their appearances leaves us vulnerable to lies.
The serpent who spoke to Eve, was the devil himself but he came as a beautiful entity with great swelling and pleasing words, but he was deadly, literally deadly.
Any time someone smiles all the time and cracks jokes frequently, we are looking at a showman, someone who is attempting to disarm those they wish to manipulate.
Car salesmen and prosperity preachers are like this. These people use two kinds of manipulation, one is to tell you how wonderful you look, flattering about nothing, the other tactic is to make you feel you would miss out on something if you didn't do what they want.
"The sale ends tomorrow, you need to buy today." or "you don't trust me" when we require more information to clarify things. The really difficult people will rage at us to take the focus off the fact that they don't know what they are talking about.
Guilting people into submission is a favored tactic of the one who loves to control others. They rage, they cut off conversations, they withhold information hoping you will make a wrong judgment so they can accuse us of judging wrongly. The tactics are endless, what is clear is that they always accuse rather than discuss.
Setting us up to believe lies and then accusing us of believing lies is a common tactic of today's manipulators.
When we run into people who are not open and honest, constantly working on their appearance rather than substance, we have met deceitful person a counterfeit. These people are likely hiding themselves, there is something in themselves they know is a problem or sin. The more we interact with artificial people, the more we can spot them.
The next question we might ask is, "am I an artificial person?" We want to be authentic, compassionate and empathetic human beings led by the Holy Spirit. This is what we should all be praying for. There is bondage associated with fakery. The truly free person is the one who is authentic and led by the Holy Spirit.
Do we want to be free from the bondage of a counterfeit personality that is always hiding, the way to do that is confess the sin of pretense and begin to seek the Holy Spirit to be our guide and our voice.
When we do this we will be free and blessed, while growing in holiness continually.
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