Sunday, September 2, 2018

Classy or Authentic?

The narcissist feels guilt when they do something wrong or unkind, but not for the same reason as a normal person feels guilt.

A normal person feels guilt that they harmed someone in some way.

The narcissist feels guilt that others may view them in a bad light when they do something wrong or mean.

In other words the normal person doesn't like to harm others even if no one is looking, they have empathy for those around them.

The narcissist does not have empathy so they only feel bad if others will view them as a bad person. If no one acts like they are offended by the narcissist, the narcissist will not feel bad for doing mean things to those for whom they have contempt.

This is why narcissists hide their mean actions from those they want to impress. They only reveal their mean side to those they think are beneath them and in secret so others don't see or notice.

This mentality of guiltlessness is growing in these last days of 2 Timothy 3. So many people are more interested in impressing people than they are in their own character qualities.

Character is not very important to the narcissist only appearances matter to them.

If someone looks good on the outside, does all the popular things, wears all the popular quality clothing as well as engaging in the activities that wow others, they are counted as "classy"." These classy people don't have to have much character or any other skills that define them as long as the outside appears pleasing to the clique.

This is where cliques reside, in the realm of superficiality based on outward appearances, substance is not very important to the narcissistic clique.

Proverbs 31:30 "Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised."

John 7:24 "Stop judging by outward appearances, and start judging justly.”

So many people are throwing around the mantra; "don't judge" while they continue to judge people as good because of outward appearances. We are to judge sin that's clear in the Bible, but we are not to hold someone in high regard because of their clothing, their popular activities or their personal accomplishments. We are to see the character of the man based on Biblical standards and judge that.

When we discover we are surrounded by superficial people who praise and flatter one another, it is time to find a new set of friends. Flatter and praise brings a snare, even keeping us connected to those who have no interest in our spiritual growth or walk with Christ.

Psalm 5:9
"For not a word they speak can be trusted; destruction is within them. Their throats are open graves; their tongues practice flattery."

Flatter and praise will bring you lots of friends, but the truth will chase them away.

Proverbs 26:28
"A lying tongue hates those it crushes, and a flattering mouth causes ruin."

Flattery and praise is deeply connected to lying. Most flattery and praise are done to manipulate and control others.

When the flattery and praise stops the superficial clique minded people suddenly disappear. Let them go, they bring nothing of value to the relationship. It is one thing to encourage in a godly way, that is different from manipulative superficial praise and flattery.

Proverbs 28:23
"He who rebukes a man will later find more favor than one who flatters with his tongue."

There are many more verses that describe a quality relationship. One that is real, honest and kind. We love to encourage one another on things that matter, on accomplishments to share in the joy of our friend. This is godly to share our friends joys and difficulties.

Love in someone causes them to share everything and receive everything from our friend. All sides of life are experienced together will make the bond stronger and relieve the pressure of the one sharing. We are to be there for one another in a very real and honest way, without pretense and superficiality.

That's what friends are like!!!!!!

Romans 12:15
"15 Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep."

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