Monday, April 22, 2019

When the Victim is not a Victim at all!

One of the tactics of a narcissist is their ability to play the victim when we have decided not to engage in argument with them. They hate it beyond measure that they were not able to dominate a conversation or communication.

When we have boundaries and standards we have a responsibility to maintain those things for personal integrity.

When a narcissist comes along expecting to overturn standards and cross our boundaries, then is the time to walk away. There are those who feel victimized when they cannot control you. They blame you for the relationship break up because you would not allow them to hammer you with their version of events or doctrine.

When we do not allow others to have their say and believe their chosen doctrine then we have crossed the line. It is one thing to discuss a matter with a fellow believer in a calm and respectful manner and quite another to hammer someone who will not be convinced by our assertions.

We all have disagreements at times, but those who cannot stand to allow us to have our beliefs without battering and punishing us, are not respectful and are not friends we want to retain.

Thankfully we are not responsible to keep everyone as a friend. We are to evaluate the value of a friendship to see if it leads us closer to God or further away from His principles.

When we see someone playing manipulative games, using intimidation, blaming and mocking then is when it is time to exit the relationship.

We always hate it when we have to assert ourselves in relationships like this, we prefer that we did not have to do it. However reason and truth dictates that we walk on down the road when we encounter those who have nothing in mind except winning. When truth is not very important, when we are not important enough to show respect to us, then too is the time to walk down the road.

The Holy Spirit can show us who and when. We have no need to analyze anything, when the Spirit speaks then we obey. No one else can assess our relationship with others, they can only give their input based on limited understanding, ultimately it is the Holy Spirit Who must give us the answer.

Hallelujah, when we trust Christ, He does really have all the answers to everything.

John 16:13-14 "13 However, when the Spirit of truth comes, He will guide you into all truth. For He will not speak on His own, but He will speak what He hears, and He will declare to you what is to come. 14 He will glorify Me by taking from what is Mine and disclosing it to you.…"




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