No Pain No Growth

I have heard it said today that "we must hurt in order to heal", this is exactly right. In the life of a believer we cannot expect to gain wisdom through all happy fun times. In fact very little is learned during these pleasurable times.

Most important lessons are learned through very difficult times that require a stretching of our emotions and spirit. We cannot learn to ignore feelings to do what is right if we never have those feelings.

Those who seek a life of pleasure cannot grow into mature human beings.

Facing life's challenges is the "no pain no gain" that strengthens us.

James 1:2-4
Testing of Your Faith
"2 Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. 4 And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

A narcissist does not wish to become mature or grow internally, they only desire to be "seen" as though they have done this.

The mindset behind the behaviors of the narcissist is so ingrained and dominant that they cannot allow themselves to think any differently from self promotion and self protection.

Often the narcissist will change up the way they operate to hide their real selves, they do this by changing one manipulative behavior for another. There is no change in their heart at all, it only appears that way because the manipulation is new.

The narcissist will hear what you say in your encounters with your friends and immediately go and tell those you spoke about. Only the information from the narcissist is nothing like what was really said. These selfish and problematic narcissists love to stir up trouble between people when there was nothing offensive occurring.

Since the narcissist is hypersensitive to criticism they will take the smallest comment and turn it into evil by changing up a few words, making it appear something that it was not at all.

One lady once mentioned to a friend while in conversation about her job, that she loved an organized home as well as an organized office.

The conversation was nothing about the hearers home or anything to do with anything the hearer was doing, but because her home was not organized she took offense. Then later the organized lady heard back from others that the hearer had claimed she had been rude in mentioning her disorganized home.

The truth was that the conversation was not anything about the home of the hearer, it was a casual benign comment about her own preferences in managing a home and office.

Sometimes when conviction hits someone they will be offended by those who are doing what is right even if those doing right say nothing or do nothing to the one who is convicted.

This is the reason I am convinced that unsaved people are convicted by the presence of born again believers even if the believers say and do nothing at all except live their life the way they believe they should.

Sometimes too, those who are unsaved will be offended that we do not go the places they go or do the things they do. Just the mere living of our lives the way we believe is enough to anger those who want us to be like them. I call it the "pack mentality" in which the entire family, school or office system requires everyone to say and do all the same things in order to be treated decently by the others.

Saying "no" to a narcissist is like dangling meat in front of a hungry lion, they will go after you as though you must be stopped from living your own life differently from them. We are seeing this in politics right now in the vitriol coming from the left who are not content to do as they please they must stop everyone else who thinks differently from even expressing themselves.

This devilish control over others exists everywhere now, in families, in churches, in schools, in government and every where else. The mentality of control over others while disallowing anyone to think for themselves under the threat of punishment and banishment is common and even dominant in our culture.

Count yourself greatly blessed if you have the leading of the Holy Spirit so intensely that no one can intimidate you to act and think the way they do.

We listen to the opinions of others, express ours and go off to think about everything and in prayer to determine truth. No one controls us, this is what makes the devil and those controlled by him so angry.

1 Peter 5:7-9 "…7 Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. 8 Be sober-minded and alert. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in your faith and in the knowledge that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of suffering.…"