Forgiving those who are not sorry and continue the bad behavior does nothing to resolve the relationship. This is the purpose of forgiveness to resolve the relationship problems when someone asks forgiveness. Without the asking the relationship is not restored and the forgiveness falls to the ground without purpose.
The psychological lie that we forgive so we are relieved is a wrong understanding of the purpose of confession and forgiveness.
God commanded us to confess to be forgiven and this is the model for human relationships too. We are not helping anyone learn righteousness and God's ways by giving them an out when they continue in their sin.
God's way is best, using man's way only leads us to what we have today, that is rampant lawlessness so boldly expressed that the righteous are punished for requiring accountability while the law breaker is coddled, pampered and enable to continue and grow worse in their sin. This is not love and it is not God's way.
If we love someone we tell the truth require confession and even recompense for wrong if possible.
"Just letting it go" has been the most dangerous phrase in our culture, leading us to the place we are in our history, more lawlessness, less conscience and greater evil flourishing more every day.
1 John 1:9
"9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
Ecclessiastes 8:-10-12 "10 Then too, I saw the burial of the wicked who used to go in and out of the holy place, and they were praised in the city where they had done so. This too is futile. 11 When the sentence for a crime is not speedily executed, the hearts of men become fully set on doing evil. 12 Although a sinner does evil a hundred times and still lives long, yet I also know that it will go well with those who fear God, who are reverent in His presence.…"
Psychology says that if we are kind and let crimes go the criminals heart will soften toward God. The truth is that the more we ignore sin and allow abuses the worse that sin and those abuses become.
Proverbs 6:12-16
12 A worthless person, a wicked man,
Is the one who walks with a perverse mouth,
13 Who winks with his eyes, who signals with his feet,
Who points with his fingers;
14 Who with perversity in his heart continually devises evil,
Who spreads strife.
15 Therefore his calamity will come suddenly;
Instantly he will be broken and there will be no healing.
16 There are six things which the Lord hates,
Yes, seven which are an abomination to Him:"
Isaiah 26:10-11 "10 Though grace is shown to the wicked man, he does not learn righteousness. In the land of righteousness he acts unjustly and fails to see the majesty of the LORD. 11 O LORD, Your hand is upraised, but they do not see it. They will see Your zeal for Your people, and be put to shame. The fire set for Your enemies will consume them!…"
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