Whatever we basically are is how we consistently act.
One cannot act against their nature, they can pretend temporarily or with certain people but eventually will revert to what is most comfortable according to their character.
As people grow older they lose the need to impress anyone so their character will often be seen in truth. They will no longer attempt to be seen any particular way they will simply be authentic. They either become sweeter as they get older or they become crabbier depending on what was hanging around inside their soul all their lives.
This has been my observations after many years of being around a narcissistic family structure.
When the mask begins to slip on the narcissist they will deny what they have done and double down on their tactics only more covertly when they have been discovered.
Trials and old age are good surfacing agents, drawing out the real person that was hiding itself inside.
Also it is common for narcissists to hide from those they wish to impress and bully those they think are beneath them only covertly that those they wish to impress will not see how mean they are to those they feel superior. This suggests to me that they know what they do to their targets is sinful, but they enjoy it anyway.
In short the covert narcissist acts as though they think if no one can see or prove their actions they have full permission to continue what is hidden.
This is very sad when it is a "Christian" who acts this way. I have to surmise that if they are content to be unkind when no one is looking they can't possibly believe God sees all that they do.
Which leads to the next question: "are they born again", my guess is that they are not, the Holy Spirit would convict a born again believer of bullying, they would not be able to enjoy the tactic, it would torment them until they confess to be cleansed.
1 John 1:9 "1 John 1:9
"9 IF WE CONFESS our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
The implication here is that those who will not confess will not be cleansed.
When we have confronted someone we love with their sin against us, it is for the purpose of discussion to resolve a matter. However when we confront to resolve and the person is resistant or silent we know they are not interested in resolving anything. It is time to remove ourselves and leave them to God.
Lovely born again believers want to discuss problems, but the unregenerate man of today hates resolutions to problems, they prefer to wallow in their own self importance without concern for relationships.
John 13:35
"35 By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
"4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant,
5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered,
6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails; but if there are gifts of prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away."
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