Narcissists love to argue to win, they are never invested in discussion to come to an agreement, it's always based on winning over someone else. Because these people are "know it alls" they believe if they think it, it is right and we are stupid.
This is why it is impossible to develop a quality relationship with someone who is hell-bent on coming out on top rather than seeing the viewpoints of their friend. Since there is no empathy or love in the narcissist they cannot see anyone else's viewpoint about anything. They work hard to force others to think like them and if they cannot convince someone to be like them they will label them as all bad and all foolish.
I say hell-bent because the devil is at the core of all these arguments usually over silly things. These people cannot learn and grow, remaining spiritual and emotional infants because of their refusal to admit they don't know everything.
Pride is at the chore root of their character, they cannot stand that anyone would believe they are not perfect without flaws. They also boast a lot about themselves and their own families to convince others of their superiority.
I have encountered narcissists who "invite you to the party so you can see them ignoring you." These people love to show off and exclude others, making their targets believe that they are inferior to them and unworthy of being included.
Gossip is a big part of the narcissist's thinking to cause others to think negatively about those who do not buy into the narrative of the narcissist. Narcissists hate worse than anything a person who thinks for themselves and does not need others to validate them.
Narcissists are empty inside when they are not surrounded by their flying monkeys who elevate them. Without people around them, there is no character at all, just an empty shell full of loneliness and despair.
Sadly though, if the narcissists would become born gain they would find out that believers enjoy the company of other lovely believers but are not desperate to have people around them all the time. We are comfortable and joyful when all we have is Christ.
We are living in a world full of narcissists more than ever now as we are moving toward the end times mentalities described in 2 Timothy 3. It doesn't take much understanding to see what is happening and how rapidly it is moving forward in nasty selfish character that demeans and mocks anyone who is not like them.
2 Timothy 3:1-5
Difficult Times Will Come
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, slanderers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness although they have denied its power; avoid such people as these."
Notice these people "have a form of religion" that they call Christianity but lack all the fruit of the Spirit.
Matthew 7:15-20
You Will Know Them by Their Fruits
15 “Beware of false prophets, who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves.
16 You will know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes from thornbushes or figs from thistles?
17 Even so, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit.
18 A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit.
19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire.
20 Therefore by their fruits you will know them."
What is the fruit?!!!! Here is what God says:
Galatians s5:22-23 "22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law.…"
The fruit of the Spirit of God Who lives in every born-again believer are the character qualities of Christ that can be discerned by every other born-again believer.
Many unsaved and unrighteous people can do good works to be loved by the community, this is not salvation and it is not the fruit of the Spirit of God. Anyone can pretend to be good for a time and fool people, but eventually, their bad fruit will emerge when things don't go their way or when they are not getting the accolades they were expecting.
Ecclesiastes 7:8
"The end of a matter is better than the beginning, and a patient spirit is better than a proud one."
May we not allow the narcissists to turn us into them by responding to their nonsense. God has our back, we need not avenge ourselves. Rmemeber narcissists do not listen to their targets expecting them to change because we informed them is an exercise in futility and as God said;
Matthew 7:6 "
“Do not give what is holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before pigs, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."
Verse 5 in 2 Timothy 3 tells us to "avoid such people", that is the command, not a suggestion. The reason we are to avoid them is because we could become like them, our friends influence us even if we don't see it.
1 Corinthians 15:33 "
Do not be deceived: “Bad company corrupts good morals.”
Proverbs 13:`19-20 "…19 Desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul, but turning from evil is detestable to fools. 20 He who walks with the wise will become wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed. "
Narcissists are led by the devil and want us to become just like them through continual taunting and poking at us.
Proverbs 13:19
"Desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul, but turning from evil is detestable to fools."
Fools hate that we walk with Christ and that He is good! They want us to dishonor Him through our ungodly responses to them. We must learn to walk alone if our only companions would be those who love their arrogance and self-righteousness.
Proverbs 2:20 "20 So you will follow in the ways of the good, and keep to the paths of the righteous."
Hebrews 6:12
"Then you will not be sluggish, but will imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised."
Proverbs 4:18
"The path of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, shining brighter and brighter until midday."
Proverbs 13:20
"He who walks with the wise will become wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed."
If you want to walk with Christ stay away from those who hate Him and hate you.
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