The devil is the father of lies. He uses lies and distortions more than any other tactic to destroy relationships.
The second most used form of destruction is withholding of information. If everyone in a relationship will be allowed all their thoughts and in honesty, then problems can be resolved, but pride refuses and confuses things for no other reason than to win.
When winning is not the goal, only finding truth to resolves a problem, then relationships can be restored.
The devil is building monstrous pride in people preventing resolutions while continuing and even escalating contempt and hatred.
John 8:44
"44 You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies."
Nephilim!!!! Really?????
One of the lies of the devil, that angels mated with humans, absolute silliness.
Genesis 1:24 "24 Then God said, "Let the earth bring forth living creatures AFTER THEIR KIND: cattle and creeping things and beasts of the earth AFTER THEIR KIND"; and it was so."
Did we get that; "AFTER THEIR OWN KIND"
If you had any questions before about Billy Graham, this ought to dispel them all! No comments here please in defense of Mr. Graham. Follow the Link:
In our culture parents are shocked when their children show them no respect. The school system teaches children, through the way they interact with them, that the children are special and have no need of parental guidance.
In fact the teachers have placed themselves in the role of the parent, undermining the values of the parent rather than upholding them.
Public school has been creating surrogate parents for our children for 50 years now, the very reason we have come this far, placing teachers and education above God and above parental guidance.
Proverbs 22:6 " 6 Train up a child in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it."
Who is God speaking to in Proverbs 22? Yep, you guessed it, parents are to train their own children.
Deuteronomy 11:18-20 "18"You shall therefore impress these words of mine on your heart and on your soul; and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. 19"You shall teach them to your sons, talking of them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road and when you lie down and when you rise up. 20"You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates,…"
Along with morals and values we ought to be teaching our children all the academic skills they need to operate in society. When they have a reading lesson, it ought to be the Bible that they are using to learn to read.
We failed in this matter of home schooling our own children. It was during a time when home schooling was just beginning to be legal. In most places in our country we would have been punished by government for not sending them to public school. It would have been a burden for many families to pay for private institutions that were Bible based.
We know first hand what happens when children are raised in a liberal area of the country with teachers who undermine the authority of the parent. The children become stubborn, rebellious and arrogant looking down their noses at their own parents.
If you are a believer and raising school age children, my advice to you it to get them out of those government schools, it will divide the family and ruin the children.
Are you in a family that uses exclusivity to control those that don't toe their line?
There are many families who are toxic, if you do not do things their way, love the things they love, dress and act the way they think you should, you will be left out of the inner circle.
These groups are called cliques, they cater to the desires of their own cloistered group while ignoring or excluding anyone who is not just like them.
Of course this does not have to do with adherence to Scriptural principles or allegiance to Christ, but to traditions and outer appearance that have nothing to do with spirituality or godliness.
People who are in bondage to these cloistered groups are not free to be in obedience to Christ, often the rules of the groups have more to do with controlling others than they do with the freedom to obey Christ.
One man pastor systems are this way too. The problem with the one man pastor system, that is not at all Biblical, is that it places one man in authority over the group, dictating his own idea of the proceedings rather than Christ as the head.
Christ is the head, the men lead, each man, not only one man. When every man participates and they seek God together for the truth, then there will never be a controller, there will not be an opportunity for the congregants to become lazy in their walk.
Often church gatherings depend on the "pastor" for their spirituality, their answers and everything else. Even neglecting their own studies at home depending on the pastor once a week to impart tidbits rather than depending on Christ throughout the week.
Every man should be participating in the preaching and teaching. No one man has the authority over a gathering, no one man is paid and no one man dictates anything. A plurality of leadership as the Bible teaches prevents "pastor worship" and a dictatorial setting in which people are frightened to speak boldly and truthfully, even afraid to correct a pastor when correction is needed.
We all ought to be seeking Christ not the pastor.
We experience this in extended family sometimes, in which the men of the family consider themselves superior to their "underlings", those whom they assess as inferior in some way.
These self appointed superiors, those they perceive as less than they, are expected to elevate them and obey their dictates. They do not allow discussion or disagreement, it is quickly squashed through intimidation and mocking.
The best way to handle these types is to avoid them. If we have to be in company with them, it is best to state our view quickly concisely and then move on if there is a sense of rage demonstrated.
The Bible clearly states that everyone who is born again has the Holy Spirit and has something to offer in a conversation about God and His principles. Every believer has gifts and insights to share because of Christ Who lives in us.
1 John 5:3-5 "…3 For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments. And His commandments are not burdensome, 4 because everyone born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world: our faith. 5 Who then overcomes the world? Only he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God.…"
1 Peter 2:4-8
"4 And coming to Him as to a living stone which has been rejected by men, but is choice and precious in the sight of God,
5 you also, as living stones, are being built up as a spiritual house for a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.
6 For this is contained in Scripture:
“Behold, I lay in Zion a choice stone, a precious corner stone,
And he who believes in Him will not be disappointed.”
7 This precious value, then, is for you who believe; but for those who disbelieve,
“The stone which the builders rejected,
This became the very corner stone,”
8 and, “A stone of stumbling and a rock of offense”;
for they stumble because they are disobedient to the word, and to this doom they were also appointed."
Every believer, man, woman and child have gifts and callings according to the Holy Spirit within them.
1 Thessalonians 5:19
"19 Do not quench the Spirit."
Anyone who desires to place you in bondage to their own power is not acting in a Christlike manner and has no interest in your spiritual health, their only interest is in controlling others.
Those who lead properly and through the Holy Spirit will recognize and encourage your gifts. When you are face with having to choose between obedience to man or obedience to Christ, you must choose Christ.
If the authority over us is cooperating with Christ then that person will be pleased with your gift and never seek to discourage you from it.
Spiritually abusive people will gossip against those how love Christ, they will even concoct a reason to turn others against their target to maintain their own power.
We can recognize these people easily when we have discernment. It is good to encourage leadership that is Biblical and to honor those in authority, however we are not called to accept everything just because a leader declares it. The leaders are just as accountable to those over which they lead as anyone under them.
John 3:30
"He must increase, but I must decrease."
Every leader ought to have this mentality, that they are to diminish themselves while uplifting Christ. They will also want correction and instruction as any believer will need.
Proverbs 4:23
"Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it springs all life."
Proverbs 4:23-24 "23 Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life. 24 Put away from you a deceitful mouth And put devious speech far from you.…"
Colossians 3:2
"2 Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth."
The man who desires to be elevated in his own right, will not be elevating Christ.
Want to make your life better? Your troubles will not disappear, but you will go through with Christ and know what to do.
Seek Christ every day and ignore those who will discourage you from doing that.
Those who do not seek Christ will not support your desire to seek Him.
Psalm 14:2
"The LORD has looked down from heaven upon the sons of men To see if there are any who understand, Who seek after God."
1 Chronicles 16:11
"Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face continually."
YES, Lot was "vexed" daily because of what he saw around him, just as we are today in our world that is becoming worse every day.
“Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”
When we love Christ above all else, our love for others will reflect His desires for them.
There are those who boast of their sin as though since they are "Christians", God no longer cares that they sin, I think this is referred to as hyper-grace.
The problem with this thinking is that Christ had to die, shedding every last drop of blood to pay for the sins of mankind. This makes sin pretty important to God.
Would He not care about sinfulness when He was brutally killed and bled out, if sin were not a big deal?
So defending your sin under the excuse that "God knows your heart", is not only silly, but downright foolish.
What the hyper-grace crowd use as an excuse to ignore and even justify their sin, has been condemned by God. Flippancy about sin, even defending it is a clue that the one who is not ashamed of their sin, is probably not born again.
When we are born again we hate sin. We want righteousness and we know that the only way we can be so is if Christ lives in us.
2 Corinthians 5:20-21 "…20 Therefore we are ambassadors for Christ, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ: Be reconciled to God. 21 God made Him who knew no sin to be sin on our behalf, so that in Him we might become the righteousness of God."
A heart that does not feel guilt or remorse for sin, is one that has not been changed into a new creation by Christ.
2 Corinthians 5:16-18 "…16 So from now on we regard no one according to the flesh. Although we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. 17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away. Behold, the new has come! 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation:"
Jeremiah 6:15 "15 "Were they ashamed because of the abomination they have done? They were not even ashamed at all; They did not even know how to blush. Therefore they shall fall among those who fall; At the time that I punish them, They shall be cast down," says the LORD. "
What is sin? Everything that defies the commands and principles of God in His Word is sin.
Hebrews 1:8-9 "…8 But about the Son He says: “Your throne, O God, will last forever and ever, and righteousness will be the scepter of Your kingdom. 9 You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness; therefore God, Your God, has placed You above Your companions by anointing You with the oil of joy.”"
Do you really think that Christ the Son of God would wink at or ignore sin when God states clearly that He loves righteousness and hates wickedness?
God says that if we are born again, He works in us and we are ambassadors for Him. Would ambassadors promote anything except that which the Master wanted?
Sin is so bad that none of it can come before the Father in heaven, the very reason Christ's blood had to pay for our sin. Only death of a perfect Sacrifice would do for our sin, how then could anyone think that God is not grieved by sin? Just because Christ paid the price for sin, does not mean we are free to flaunt it in His face as though it doesn't matter, its the same as if sin didn't matter to us, even when our Savior had to bleed to pay for it. How callous is that, to make light of sin when it cost Christ everything to pay the penalty for it.
Even in human nature, if someone saves our life we feel a sense of gratitude, not wanting to do anything that displeases our rescuer. How much more should our gratitude be toward Christ Who pays for the sin with His blood and then saves us from an eternal hell.
God says: Psalm 5:5-6
"For you are not a God who takes pleasure in wickedness, nor shall evil dwell with you. The boastful shall not stand in Your sight: You hate all workers of Iniquity. You shall destroy those who speak falsehood; The Lord abhors the "bloodthirsty and deceitful man."
There is hatred and contempt for God in anyone who is not ashamed of sin, defending it reveals a rebellious heart while using the excuse that "God knows my heart", is lying, God does know a heart who will not confess their sin and turn from it, that being a heart of contempt for Him.
Why do I write so much about narcissism? Here is why:
2 Timothy 3:1-5
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
In our day we will be dealing with a lot of it, these people will attempt to turn you away from telling the truth and following Christ because their hearts are darkened.
They will not be satisfied with ignoring you, they must discredit you through gossip, through covert means of demeaning and mocking while shaming you to your face whenever they have the opportunity.
The best way to combat this is to avoid them whenever you can, but if that is not possible be strong enough to ignore them, remaining silent when they attack. They are looking for every utterance as an excuse to carry out their tactics. According to God's Word we are not to bother sharing wisdom with those who will use it for opportunity to trample on God and His messengers.
Proverbs 29:11
"A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back."
Proverbs 1:7
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction."
Proverbs 29:9
"If a wise man has an argument with a fool, the fool only rages and laughs, and there is no quiet."
Matthew 7:6
"6 “Do not give what is holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."
When we have to be in the presence of the mocker it is best to obey God and show them the kindness God has shown us, remaining innocent, that our conscience be free from retaliation.
Romans 12:13-15 "13 Share with the saints who are in need. Practice hospitality. 14 Bless those who persecute you. Bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep."
Sometimes we cannot avoid the mean spirited person who wishes to diminish our walk, when this is the case we do what we should according to God's Word and leave those who reject Christ and us, to the Lord.
If there is not a very big change after becoming a Christian, in the WAY someone thinks that creates a change in their responses and choices to life, then there has been an emotional response, perhaps to fit into those they wish to engage with, or some other benefit for them. When we become born again our entire thought process is changed to the opposite and our actions follow.
Becoming a Christian is very often not translated into becoming born again. When Christ changes us into a new creation we begin our growing process that never ends until we go home.
Ephesians 2:10
"10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them."
If you are attempting to change yourself, it is fleshly desire to remain in control of your own life. Rather than trying to be a good person on your own, in your own strength, one must confess sinfulness, ask Christ to change you and then begin to trust Him to make all the changes in the WAY you think which will result in the way you act and even the way you process life.
1 John 3:8-10 "…8 The one who practices sin is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the very start. This is why the Son of God was revealed, to destroy the works of the devil. 9 Anyone born of God refuses to practice sin, because God’s seed abides in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God. 10 By this the children of God and the children of the devil can be distinguished: Anyone who does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is anyone who does not love his brother."
Notice that not loving your brother is evidence of one who is not born again. I see so many pretenders who love their arrogance and are devoid of respect for others, these are clues something is deeply wrong.
There are many disrespectful people who accuse others of disrespect to deflect notice from their own sinfulness. When a narcissist accuses you of being disrespectful, they are really describing themselves. This will be true of any other accusations they throw at us.
Romans 12:10
"Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor."
When there is an absence of honor for people, we know there is also an absence of honor for God. If we cannot honor people whom we can see, we are not likely to honor God Whom we cannot see. The evidence of this mentality is seen in the extraction of Scripture from its context to make it say things God never said, in order to justify sin. Another way we see this is when someone adds concepts to the Bible that God never commanded, in order to control others.
Titus 2:7
"Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity,"
Arguing and fighting to win, especially with those who are older, is monstrous disrespect, something we see in the young people often today.
2 Timothy 2:14
"Remind them of these things, and solemnly charge them in the presence of God not to wrangle about words, which is useless and leads to the ruin of the hearers."
Leviticus 19:32
“You shall stand up before the gray head and honor the face of an old man, and you shall fear your God: I am the Lord."
Exodus 20:12 ". 12 "Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you. "
When we see the proliferation of 2 Timothy 3, we are reminded that we live in times in which we cannot expect the principles of God to be valued, in fact, we will probably be delighted and surprised when someone honors God's Word above everyone and everything else, because of the rarity of it.
Romans 12:9-11
"Let love be genuine. Abhor what is evil; hold fast to what is good. Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not be slothful in zeal, be fervent in spirit, serve the Lord."
When love is genuine there will not be competition to appear superior with others, in fact we will see ourselves as no more or no less than anyone else, the matter is entirely irrelevant to us.
There is a saying, I don't know where it came from or who said it but it goes like this;
"one of the elements of holiness is the absence of self awareness.
Philippians 2:2-4 "…2 then make my joy complete by being of one mind, having the same love, being united in spirit and purpose. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.…"
Individualism and individual accomplishment has been the downfall of this country. When the individual is praised and held above the whole, we have lost the "what is best for all", in the thinking process.
"No man is an island" is an idea that has also been lost. Everything we do and say affects others around us. To think that there is such a thing as a victimless crime or an act that only affects us, is denying the impact our influence has on others.
The pain and suffering in the world increases when we think singularly, without empathy for those around us, devoted to ourselves alone.
When we love Christ, know where we came from and where we are going, we will not boast of one thing about ourselves, not within ourselves secretly or openly in front of others. We will not think in terms of our actions being for us alone, ever!
Matthew 5:13-16
"You are the salt of the earth; but if the salt has become tasteless, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled under foot by men."
1 Corinthians 15:33
"Do not be deceived: "Bad company corrupts good morals."
1 Corinthians 8:9-13
"But take care that this liberty of yours does not somehow become a stumbling block to the weak."
"When toxic people cannot control how you see yourself, they will attempt to control how others see you."
Protestants often think they don't have a leader like a pope, I am here to tell you that they do, they have their Protestant popes that they show allegiance to even more than they do Christ.
These Protestant popes are the famous teachers and preachers that are popular and elevated in their eyes.
God tells us not to hold any man in that high regard that they cannot be criticized or scrutinized.
1 Thessalonians 5:21
"21 But examine everything carefully; hold fast to that which is good;"
Ephesians 5:10-11 "…10 Test and prove what pleases the Lord. 11 Have no fellowship with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them."
2 Corinthians 11:3-4 "…3 I am afraid, however, that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may be led astray from your simple and pure devotion to Christ. 4 For if someone comes and proclaims a Jesus other than the One we proclaimed, or if you receive a different spirit than the One you received, or a different gospel than the one you accepted, you put up with it way too easily."
Sadly this is happening today just as it did in Corinth. Men are bringing a false gospel and the people are defending the man, even after seeing the evidence of deeply false teaching, teaching that denies Christ, they will continue to defend the man. This tells me the man is more important to them than Christ is or His gospel.
Even after being told the evil that these men preached, they choose to believe what they want to rather than exposing it and refusing to be part of it.
UGH!!!!!!!
Just because we believe something does not mean it is true. Many people will sincerely believe the lies of the cults, even live moral lives and think they are right, but will end up in hell for not trusting in Christ and being willing to be changed by Him.
Believing sincerely is not evidence of truth. The devil believed he could overthrow God and become like him, we know how that turned out.
Hitler believed he had a right to rule the world, we also know how that turned out.
Believing something sincerely is not evidence that something is true. Truth is not relative or subjective. All truth must be based on something, that is the Word of God.
Our culture tends to evaluate truth on the basis of their feelings rather than the facts of the Bible.
When we evaluate someone's ministry, and we should do that, it needs to be evaluated according to the principles of the Bible not our feelings or how we choose to interpret the Scriptures.
We should not be asking "What do I think of that Scripture?", our question ought to be "what did God mean by what He said?"
We find the meaning of passages by knowing the entire Bible. When one part of the Bible is read in isolation to the rest of the Bible there are misunderstandings, this is how cults begin.
This is also how the acceptance of divorce and remarriage was proliferated in the church.
The one man pastor syndrome began because there were a few passages were taken out of context and twisted to justify that system. There are many other wrong teachings and misunderstandings because those with an agenda decided they wanted to be like the world, so they found ways to incorporate the world into the church.
Many believers are disobeying the Word because they have been told wrong things about it.
When we search the Scriptures as we would if we were mining for silver or gold, by the sweat of our brows, digging and digging while praying for truth, we would find that so many things we have practiced all our lives were not commanded by God, some even condemned by Him.
Bottom line: Seek Christ in prayer and read the Bible to find God's meaning, without reading to see how we can justify what we want to believe. If you are willing to know truth, giving up all the wrong things you were taught, then God will open your eyes and you will never be able to go back to those things.
Proverbs 3:6
"In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."
Psalm 28:7
"The Lord is my strength and my shield; in him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to him."
Romans 15:13
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."
Isaiah 26:3
"You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you."
Toxic people always get around to targeting your character rather than your argument. This is a sign of an immature person who cares only about demeaning you, they see it as a win.
Proverbs 29:10-13 "…10 Men of bloodshed hate the blameless, But the upright are concerned for his life. 11 A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back. 12 If a ruler pays attention to falsehood, All his ministers become wicked.…"
Get ready brothers and sisters we are in for a bumpy ride, never fear though, we know what to do, that is stay close to Christ and reject any feeling of giving up.
"When toxic people cannot control how you see yourself, they will attempt to control how others see you."
Blanket statements and generalizations are the accusations of toxic people because they know they don't really have anything against you except that you won't be like them.
I have never met a toxic person who starts a fight that ever brings details to prove their point. First they generalize, then they accuse and then attack. There are no specifics, they are merely in a war with you because of their jealousy or hope to be superior to you.
When we walk according to our own convictions, refusing to bow to the standards of others we will be a target for the toxic person.
The standards of the believer are based on the Holy Word of God and His principles. The toxic person hates this, they want to be our god. When they see that we have another God, that contradicts their ideas of goodness, they are enraged, seeking to do whatever it takes to devalue us, not only in our own eyes but in the eyes of others too, as they gossip, tell half truths and even out and out lies to cause division and isolate us from others who might otherwise love us.
The toxic person can't stand that others love us, they must do something to ruin that love by their whispers and distortions.
These self exalted toxic persons put labels on you, again without specifics. Because you will not bow to their perspective they will call you "rebellious" or "stubborn." Even telling others who might love you that you are these things, to cause those who might love you to question your character.
Sadly anyone who believes them is not acting in love and may have to be avoided too. A wise man believes what he sees for himself.
These relationship destroyers will operated often from the standpoint of assumptions and feelings rather than facts. They choose to believe things about us because of their intense dislike for us, and then pass those assumptions on as facts, to others, again without specifics and evidence to back up their assertions.
Since we know that the Lord is all about love and justice, it is difficult to see these toxic people as born again, they lack justice and love. Many of their desired beliefs about us are irrational and contrived. The question ought to be "why do they want to dislike us."
We know who the father of all this monstrous chaos is, yes...it's the devil himself. The devil is using people full of rebellion, contempt and jealousy to come against those who love Christ.
When we attempt to have a conversation about anything that is bothering us that was done to us, we are told we are "too sensitive", or that they didn't say or do what you know they did. Denial is a big part of the narcissists life, they will always pull this one out of the rabbits hat whenever it is needed. It is called "gaslighting", an attempt is made to make us look silly or crazy to deflect them from any responsibility.
The toxic person will never address the real issue, it will always degenerate into accusations unrelated to the problem or an attack of character.
Toxic people presume to know what others are thinking so they feel no need to listen. Unfortunately they are basing their assessment of what you are thinking on the way they think, not on how you think, they won't listen long enough to know how you think.
A toxic person lies frequently so they will believe others are lying to them. They twist facts so they accuse others of twisting facts. The trademark of the toxic person is to "get you before you get them", because they are always out to win in any discourse, they will attack quickly to have the upper hand. Since their mentality is always in attack mode, they will assume you want to attack them even for the slightest and mildest questioning or statements to discuss anything.
Toxic people do not want to discuss anything, they think they know everything, even what you are thinking or planning so they refuse to allow their target to have their say or explain their own thinking. Assumptions are a big factor in the heart of the toxic person.
It is a blessing to learn what evil looks like and how it operates. Keeping in mind that the one who is toxic is a pawn in the hands of the devil, we can avoid the trap of the devil. He is continually whispering in the ears and hearts of those who have no defense against him. Every day he is building up lies and assumptions within those who are full of deceit.
When we know what we are dealing with we can use the weapons of spiritual warfare, prayer, silence and removing ourselves so as not to be guilty of the same things the toxic person is guilty of, that is fighting to win in an argument that turns irrational.
Ephesians 5:11-13 "…11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can make your stand against the devil’s schemes. 12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this world's darkness, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. 13 Therefore take up the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you will be able to stand your ground, and having done everything, to stand.…"
If you find yourself unable to look at the truth in someone because you are emotionally invested in the gooy feelings about them, then you need to evaluate your own motives.
We should be able to tell the truth about anyone all the time. Narcissist think of criticism as a stab of death, they don't understand that because we love God so much we refuse to put anyone on the level of "perfect", only God gets that title.
When we cannot see things in truth, even making up our own truth to "feel" good, we have denied the truth.
Narcissists only like truth when it elevates them or makes them feel good. Unfortunately much of life is correction, confession and a change of heart, but only if we want truth.
Those who do not want truth, only good feelings and an elevated position will never grow spiritually or emotionally. Narcissists are on a six year old level, lacking maturity even fighting against truth to maintain their fantasies. The "positive affirmation" lies have caused an entire culture to think "if you can't say anything good, don't say anything at all", to intimidate people into lying to keep their place in the family or community. It is not Biblical to want to only see everything based on happiness or our favored fantasies.
2 John 4
"4 I rejoiced greatly to find some of your children walking in the TRUTH, just as we were commanded by the Father."
I place no trust in man. God can use anyone, even deceivers, but that doesn't make the deceivers alright.
We need to expose the wrong things people do and say while leaving their eternal destination to God. I don't know if Billy Graham was saved or not, it doesn't matter to me, I don't have to decide.
But that means that I will not decide that he was good or that he was bad, I will only expose what he actually said and then come against bad doctrine.
Why do so many people feel a need to decide whether someone went to heaven or hell? God will do His own will, we must trust Him. I have no desire to place any man so high on a pedestal that no one can criticize him.
We must be able to evaluate every man based on their teachings and their deeds. If we cannot face the truth about someone, then that someone is our idol.
Romans 3:4
"4 May it never be! Rather, let God be found true, though every man be found a liar, as it is written, “That You may be justified in Your words,
And prevail when You are judged.”
Anyone who thinks we are obligated to defer to them or that we are obligated to give them more respect than they are willing to give to us, is a controlling and selfish individual.
Kind and loving people care about the needs and desires of others. They have no interest in being in control, or having more respect than anyone else. They do not elevate their importance above others. When we meet someone who is demanding respect, then we have met a person who does not respect others. Their demand of it gives them away.
Kind and loving people are introspective, they want to know their own inner motives to become a better person, their concern is about their own growth in righteousness, not in whether someone else is noticing it or praising them because of it. If someone wants praise all the time, then chances are they are not growing and they do not honor or respect others.
The controller does not introspect, they have elevated views of their own importance as well as grandiose ideas about their own achievements, none of which are warranted. Appearing special and above others is far more important to the selfish person than actually being Christ like. The reason they clamor to be elevated is because they know what they are, deficient in the things that matter, so the create a phony appearance to fool others.
They encourage a view of themselves, whether true or not, that takes presedence over anyone else. This mentality was taught in the public school system for years and aped in the churches, that "we should love ourselves first."
The lie was propagated that we cannot love others unless we love ourselves first. This was a lie from the devil coming out of the psychological community with it's basis and origins from evolutionary thinking. The lie that we are merely animals responding to stimuli is the school of thought that has been taught in every institution.
The truth is that we are not likely to love others when self is the focus.
Philippians 2:2-4 "…2 then make my joy complete by being of one mind, having the same love, being united in spirit and purpose. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."
Even in the seminaries where creationism has been taught, the concept that bad people are merely hurting souls, was spawned out of evolution. It is good sense to know that we do not poke at others when we have been poked by someone else. In fact if we are loving and kind, we seek never to do the evil to others that was done to us.
There are those who poke at good people hoping to get a negative reaction so they can feel justified in their contempt for them. Self lovers rarely care about others.
God never speaks about evil people as merely hurting souls being the reason they hurt others. Adam and Eve were made perfect and given a choice. No one hurt Adam and Eve, causing them to disobey and listen to the devil, that was a choice they made because of a heart that disobeyed God.
Evil people do evil things because their hearts are evil.
Matthew 15:17-19 "…17 “Do you not yet realize that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then is eliminated? 18 But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these things defile a man. 19 For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, and slander.…"
I have known children who came out of wonderful home environments who went bad and I have known children who came from terrible environments that chose to follow Christ. Each person has a choice to be good or bad, no one forces them and no one is at fault except themselves.
Ezekiel 18:20 "20 The person who sins will die. The son will not bear the punishment for the father’s iniquity, nor will the father bear the punishment for the son’s iniquity; the righteousness of the righteous will be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked will be upon himself."
If there is anyone who is seeking revenge for either real or perceived slights, then that person has an evil heart. God does not give us excuses to be unkind to others because someone else was unkind to us.
When we find ourselves continually being poked by someone hell bent on ruining us, then we are not to do revenge, we are to avoid them, knowing that there is no way we can fix them, knowing that these kind of people never listen, they merely step up their hatred for being exposed.
2 Timothy 3:1-5
"1 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
Bottom Line: Expect hatred and contempt, this sort of treatment in these days of apostasy and rebellion is growing, while learning to walk away without response. Do not attempt to reason with those who love their sin. Any response at all is food for the wicked person, it is best to ignore them completely.
Isaiah 26:10 "10 Though the wicked is shown favor, He does not learn righteousness; He deals unjustly in the land of uprightness, And does not perceive the majesty of the LORD."
In these days of apostasy, many others will be offended when we just do our own thing, they want us to be just like them, validating them by imitating them.
Merely going down your own road without them is enough to set off the anger of the narcissist. They cannot stand anyone who chooses their own road.
Romans 16:17-18
"I appeal to you, brothers, to watch out for those who cause divisions and create obstacles contrary to the doctrine that you have been taught; avoid them. For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites, and by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naive."
It is important to remember that we can love people, even appreciate the work they do for the Lord, but it is not an option to treat them like gods. We ought to be able to correct anyone at any time when they are violating the Scripture. We ought to be able to share advice when we see our brother or sister about to make a mistake or commit a sin.
When we cannot face the flaws of someone we love, then we have created an idol in our own minds.
Idol worshipers have the tendency to see only good in those they like while seeing only bad in those that do not elevate them as special.
As believers we should hate the idea of being worshiped by someone else. Worship should only be toward God, not any human being no matter how much we like them or agree with them.
We can love people more fully and in spite of their warts, when we love God most.
Elisabeth Elliot ~" If you don't see the hand of God in even the smallest setbacks and inconveniences, you will be blind to the meaning that God wants you to find in your deeper sufferings."
Mrs. Elliots quote encourages us when things don't seem to make any sense, and in these times of 2 Timothy 3, a lot doesn't make good sense.
Empathy is the desire to be sure to understand before we judge another person. There are many things people judge that are not their business and have nothing to do with sin.
Jealousy is a big factor in how some people judge others. If there is a desire to view someone as less than, others may jealously judge them as inferior or worthy of disrespect.
We see this all the time in relationships. Those who are jealous of someone often disregard the talents or accomplishments of their target, even concocting things that are not true in an effort to look down their noses at others.
We must guard ourselves against judging things that are not our business, remembering that perhaps there is an ulterior motive behind our judging.
God never forbade judging, but He did instruct us to "judge righteously", that is according to His Word and with plenty of evidence.
I remember when Nathan rebuked David in a round about way, eliciting a response from him to get him to think about his own sin. Nathan used an story about someone, describing how a man stole a lamb from someone else. David was irate until he realized the story was about himself.
How many times have you tried to explain the sin of a friend or relative only being met by rage and anger that we exposed it?
In using the story about the lamb another man stole, he was able to get David to listen to him, then when it was revealed that he was that man, David became broken and repentant.
In our world today that same tactic would be used only to be met with "you shouldn't judge that man", or the hearer would know it was about them and rage to deflect guilt.
David was a man after God's own heart, he sinned against God. The evidence that he belonged to God was his brokenness over the sin itself.
Now days we can expose sin all day long to correct or resolve a relationship problem and it will be met with rage, intimidation and mocking to devalue the one who is begging to be relieved of the pain of the constant harm done against them.
I am convinced that those who rage when confronted with their sin against us could not possibly know Christ. When Christ lives in us He convicts us of our sin, often before anyone reveals it.
We are living in a world that denies and even defends the sin they do against others. They mock those who are attempting to clean up a relationship problem. Relationships cannot be restored when the offender refuse to see that they have sinned against someone.
In a world where all they have to do is "delete" us, or "block" us, there is no felt need to fix what is broken, they simply throw it away. In my own case, I have attempted many times to speak to those who continue to demean, mock and lie against me, always being met with rage and refusal to hear anything at all if it is going to show their sin against me.
Now I have had to block and delete people who have refused to change their actions toward me, their attitude remains contemptuous, displaying covert rudeness every time we are together, therefore I have reconciled myself to the fact that these relationships cannot continue, they have no purpose, there is no growing or changing, so they must be removed from my life.
When we have encountered 50 years of spiritual and emotional abuse from those who say they are Christians but have no conscience over the way they treat us, then we have no choice except to delete and block them.
Godly men and women hate their sin, they are convicted when the Holy Spirit shows them within themselves before they are even exposed. However, if they sin without realizing it, they accept a correction or rebuke from those they have harmed and quickly openly show remorse to be reconciled. Godly men and women are not concerned about the delivery, they care only about the truth of it. Those who are rebellious, refusing to admit their sin will almost always respond by attacking our delivery, even if the delivery was mild but truthful.
2 Samuel 12:1-15
Nathan Rebukes David
12 Then the Lord sent Nathan to David. And he came to him and said,
“There were two men in one city, the one rich and the other poor.
2 “The rich man had a great many flocks and herds.
3 “But the poor man had nothing except one little ewe lamb
Which he bought and nourished;
And it grew up together with him and his children.
It would eat of his bread and drink of his cup and lie in his bosom,
And was like a daughter to him.
4 “Now a traveler came to the rich man,
And he was unwilling to take from his own flock or his own herd,
To prepare for the wayfarer who had come to him;
Rather he took the poor man’s ewe lamb and prepared it for the man who had come to him.”
5 Then David’s anger burned greatly against the man, and he said to Nathan, “As the Lord lives, surely the man who has done this deserves to die.
6 He must make restitution for the lamb fourfold, because he did this thing and had no compassion.”
7 Nathan then said to David, “You are the man! Thus says the Lord God of Israel, ‘It is I who anointed you king over Israel and it is I who delivered you from the hand of Saul.
8 I also gave you your master’s house and your master’s wives into your care, and I gave you the house of Israel and Judah; and if that had been too little, I would have added to you many more things like these!
9 Why have you despised the word of the Lord by doing evil in His sight? You have struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword, have taken his wife to be your wife, and have killed him with the sword of the sons of Ammon.
10 Now therefore, the sword shall never depart from your house, because you have despised Me and have taken the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your wife.’
11 Thus says the Lord, ‘Behold, I will raise up evil against you from your own household; I will even take your wives before your eyes and give them to your companion, and he will lie with your wives in broad daylight.
12 Indeed you did it secretly, but I will do this thing before all Israel, and under the sun.’” 13 Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” And Nathan said to David, “The Lord also has taken away your sin; you shall not die.
14 However, because by this deed you have given occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme, the child also that is born to you shall surely die.”
15 So Nathan went to his house."
David repented, but lived for the rest of his life with the consequences of his deeds.
If we are trusting in our own or other human devices then we are not hearing from the Holy Spirit. God wants us to trust Him for salvation and everything else after that too.
John 14:1-31
1 “Do not let your heart be troubled; believe in God, believe also in Me.
2 In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you.
3 If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also.
4 And you know the way where I am going.”
5 Thomas *said to Him, “Lord, we do not know where You are going, how do we know the way?”
6 Jesus *said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.
7 If you had known Me, you would have known My Father also; from now on you know Him, and have seen Him.”
8 Philip *said to Him, “Lord, show us the Father, and it is enough for us.” 9 Jesus *said to him, “Have I been so long with you, and yet you have not come to know Me, Philip? He who has seen Me has seen the Father; how can you say, ‘Show us the Father’?
10 Do you not believe that I am in the Father, and the Father is in Me? The words that I say to you I do not speak on My own initiative, but the Father abiding in Me does His works.
11 Believe Me that I am in the Father and the Father is in Me; otherwise believe because of the works themselves.
12 Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do, he will do also; and greater works than these he will do; because I go to the Father.
13 Whatever you ask in My name, that will I do, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.
14 If you ask Me anything in My name, I will do it.
15 “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.
Role of the Spirit
16 I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever;
17 that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you.
18 “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.
19 After a little while the world will no longer see Me, but you will see Me; because I live, you will live also.
20 In that day you will know that I am in My Father, and you in Me, and I in you.
21 He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me; and he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will disclose Myself to him.”
22 Judas (not Iscariot) *said to Him, “Lord, what then has happened that You are going to disclose Yourself to us and not to the world?”
23 Jesus answered and said to him, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him.
24 He who does not love Me does not keep My words; and the word which you hear is not Mine, but the Father’s who sent Me.
25 “These things I have spoken to you while abiding with you.
26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you.
27 Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.
28 You heard that I said to you, ‘I go away, and I will come to you.’ If you loved Me, you would have rejoiced because I go to the Father, for the Father is greater than I.
29 Now I have told you before it happens, so that when it happens, you may believe.
30 I will not speak much more with you, for the ruler of the world is coming, and he has nothing in Me;
31 but so that the world may know that I love the Father, I do exactly as the Father commanded Me. Get up, let us go from here."
Many of our church traditions have nothing to do with Christianity, they originated from paganism, and yet it is nearly impossible to convince those who love these holidays and have been practicing them all their lives.
Follow the Link:
When we have Christian love we tell the truth, but we do not intimidate, mock, demean or manipulate, those are tactics of the devil not of the born again believer.
One of the tricks of the narcissist is to judge their target as morally deficient in some way. They will make something up based on silly and petty things if they cannot find anything real.
Satan has been using this tactic before the throne of grace every day accusing believers. It will never work, Christ is our advocate, but the devil will try anyway.
The narcissist see everything in black and white, they cannot tolerate evaluation of events, because those involved are either all perfect or all wrong, depending on who elevates them.
When we love Christ and people we will see everything in honesty. We will see the good and bad in everyone, but never treat them with contempt because they are not perfect.
The narcissist feels justified in treating shamefully anyone who disagrees with them, dares to have their own thoughts and values and worse yet, those who are brazen enough to actually correct wrong thinking based on the Bible.
As we see these things growing, we need to be learning how to avoid these people, how to refrain from responding to their attempts at angering us and allow them to be them.
Our anger toward the narcissist does nothing, it does not change them, it doesn't validate us, it is merely the trick of the devil to discredit our Christianity.
Never allow the narcissist's tactics to manipulate our feelings and our responses. The more we realize their rages or sulks are not about us at all, they are tactics to intimidate and cause false guilt.
The Devil is using the mouths of people who have no defenses against him, they are pawns in his scheme to denigrate the believer. We can pray for these people, but we do not keep them as companions, they can do much damage to us and others in our circle of friends.
Thankfully the Devil has no control over us when we are submitted to Christ.
Bitterness toward the narcissist does nothing except shoot ourselves in the head. It does not change them, it doesn't make us more in control, actually just the opposite. The more bitter and angry we become the less in control we are of our own being.
This is the secret to dealing with those who are ruled and controlled by the devil, that is that we do no revenge, we remove ourselves when possible and we pray for the Lord to work in their lives, as well as praying that the Lord will protect us from wrong thinking and bad attitudes.
