Living the Christian Life in the Spirit

We can pretend to live Scripture, working real hard to look good on the outside, but if we are doing it in the flesh it will fade over time. If Christ is doing it in us, then we will progress and never regress.

 

The question to ask is, "are we living this Christian life in our flesh to impress others or are we desiring to be cleansed and empowered by Christ Who lives in us?"

Brothers and Sister of Other Mothers

To all my brothers and sisters of other mothers, LOL, one day we will meet at the Marriage Supper of the Lamb, what a reunion that will be in the presence of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!! And, I think it will be soon!

Yearning For My Heavenly Home

I was just commenting to Sherry a dear Christian Sister my thoughts about going home.

"I feel as if I am walking around in the sewer up to my hips looking for a way to escape it all. I am not attempting to escape or I wouldn't be on facebook LOL, but I so want this all to be over!

I do hope along the way someone will either come to Christ or a believer come closer to Him while I am still here, but that is all up to God.

I'll just keep doing what He told me to until He moves me on. I know you will too, all my godly facebook friends seem to be driven to speak for God right before we go."
 I am quite sure I am not alone in these desires!!!!!

If We Are Born Again We Have An Amazing Future

I don't know about all of you, but I am excited about the next year 2016, it is just a little closer to the return of our Lord. Imagine leaving this sin sick world, while leaving behind our struggle with people and our struggle with our own flesh.
 
Then enjoying the wonderful Marriage Supper of the Lamb, after which we return with Christ to see Him destroy, in His wrath, all the evil on the earth. Then comes the Millennium, 1000 years with Christ as our King while we reign... with Him. 
 

Imagine, if you can, a world with the perfect Ruler and swift justice!!!! It is hard for us to wrap our minds around since we have lived a lifetime in this world, but we know it will be wonderful!
Hallelujah, He is coming soon!!!

Get Out of the Way and Let God Work

Narcissists love to make judgements about others based not on things they have seen but on insignificant events interpreted the way they want to see them rather than on substance and reality.
If a narcissists has been injured through criticism, no matter how minor, they will develop in their minds attitudes and events they never saw but assumed based on their desire to negate their target.
It is quite uncanny to watch these self elevated narcissists do their dastardly work. 

 When they have convinced themselves that something is true about another person, without tangible evidence, they will speak these things to others as though they are fact, producing allies through this triangulation.

When the target senses something is wrong and attempts to talk about it, the narcissist will claim there is nothing wrong and continue to treat the target in covertly demeaning ways to show their contempt for them, while still being able to pretend they did or said nothing wrong. They never do their covert acts in front of others, they always wait until there is no one else around to witness the acts and attitudes.

These tactics are used for many reasons, some of which are jealousy, a real or perceived injury, a response of "no" when asked to do something, the targets choice not to engage in something the way a narcissist expect you to engage and other things that really have little to do with anything the target is doing, but rather the need for the narc to control their target, when the target is strong enough to stand against the controlling behavior the narc becomes vengeful.

The good news is that when we know what we are dealing with we can acquire the skills to deal with it in a Christ-like manner. AND NO, we do not "turn the other cheek" when the abuse someone is experiencing is continual, we also do not negate the pain another brother or sister may be experiencing by saying silly things like "just love them." What narcissists need is discipline, removal of their friends and abused extended family and lots of prayer that God will get through that hard rock heart, turning it into a heart of flesh. God does not need us to remain in a wicked person's life to influence them for God, often He wants us to exact consequences on them by removing ourselves while allowing God to do what He knows they need for their repentance.

1 2 Timothy 3 God clearly commands us to get away from wicked people.

Contentious Arrogant People Love to Argue

"Never wrestle with a pig, you'll get dirty, besides the pigs like it. "
George Bernard Shaw

God says it this way: Matthew 7:6 ""Do not give what is holy to dogs, and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under their feet, and turn and tear you to pieces."

Seek The Lord Now Before It Is Too Late

Often in the early years, children see it as an invasion of their person, for a parent to instruct or correct them, Their opinion of themselves is so high, it is anathema to even instruct let alone rebuke.
Adult children can be upset when they don't have enough money at the end of the paycheck, and equally angry because parents will not bail them out they hold their parent in contempt. Those who do not take care of business with wisdom, like to blame others rather than own what they did to themselves. The most irritating of all to these people is any mention of the principles of God.

Interesting how we should remain silent when they are making their mistakes, just letting them do it without counsel, but then they expect us to help them when they wouldn't listen in the first place, we are watching irrational thinking.

A wise man can say, "I did this to myself" when they misstep, while moving on to correct the mistake, doing things differently in the future. The wise adult child listens to elders and prays, the wise parent encourages them through their consequences not through bail-out.

The foolish son, when bailed out, does not learn, they keep repeating the same silly actions expecting life to get better, but they do not recognize that they have not changed the heart that caused the mess in the first place.

Proverbs 19:1-12
"19 Better is a poor man who walks in his integrity
Than he who is perverse in speech and is a fool.
2 Also it is not good for a person to be without knowledge,
And he who hurries his footsteps errs.
3 The foolishness of man ruins his way, And his heart rages against the Lord.
4 Wealth adds many friends, But a poor man is separated from his friend.
5 A false witness will not go unpunished, And he who tells lies will not escape.
6 Many will seek the favor of a generous man, And every man is a friend to him who gives gifts.
7 All the brothers of a poor man hate him; How much more do his friends abandon him! He pursues them with words, but they are gone.
8 He who gets wisdom loves his own soul; He who keeps understanding will find good.
9 A false witness will not go unpunished, And he who tells lies will perish.
10 Luxury is not fitting for a fool; Much less for a slave to rule over princes.
11 A man’s discretion makes him slow to anger, And it is his glory to overlook a transgression.
12 The king’s wrath is like the roaring of a lion, But his favor is like dew on the grass."

Albert Einstein said "the definition of insanity is doing something over and over again and expecting a different result."

Had they listened first, all their mess would have been prevented, there would be no need for a bail-out or consequences. I have seen this in the lives of many people, continually helping irresponsible children to remain irresponsible through bail-outs.

We learn from our mistakes but only if we go through them with consequences and hard work to correct them, even gladly accepting counsel from others who have been successful in their walk, learning from their mistakes and ready to share the solutions, so that others don't have to encounter what they did. Those who have successfully been through trials and mistakes, are the most qualified to counsel. Those who think they need no counsel delude themselves, maintaining an elevated view of their own importance, they are on a downward spiral, that later will be seen, even if it is hidden for a time.

Ungratefulness is becoming so common that even the seculars can no longer ignore it. We are living in times of ungratefulness! This ungratefulness is creating an attitude of entitlement. Many adult children won't listen to anything, they think their parents are stupid, rejecting their wisdom, while elevating only those that validate their foolishness or help them wallow in their mess as though their choices were someone else's fault. We are seeing many parents doubt their own wisdom because of the rejection and disrespect of their narcissistic adult children.
This has become so very common now, it is difficult to see successes, the attitudes are deeply selfish lacking empathy or kindness.

2 Timothy 3:1-5
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."

When I speak of all that is going on now, it is not just to vent, it is to inform others of what God has warned us about, encouraging others, that they are not insane nor are they "negative." We really are seeing the end times played out in our lives up close and personal. We need to know this to seek God for the answer in terms of our responses.

I am learning that we cannot make anyone else understand, we can only warn and then walk away when we see they are not listening. A form of bailing out a rebellious person is to remain in their lives validating their lifestyle while they remain resistant to truth and change. All that we do is an influence to others looking on, none of our actions are unobserved by others.

For years I didn't know how to deal with what I was sure I was seeing, but couldn't prove. So many adults were accepting wrong attitudes, using the excuse that "they will grow out of it." People don't automatically grow out of bad attitudes, they have to be instructed and they must make a choice to embrace God's principles. Things just didn't seem right to me, anger was being returned for good solid and Biblical counsel. Attempts to make the principles of God look subjective, making those who told the truth look mean and insane.

As we encountered more of this in our culture, we began to accept that it was the unbelievers who were volatile and resentful. Unfortunately, we now see this unteachable mentality, rejection and resistance in the churches. The only people that get an ear of the rebellious heart are the "experts", those with special credentials behind their name. Once someone has bought into the idea that only those with credentials have the wisdom, then we have lost the fight, since so many credentialed people are not getting to the heart of the matter....being the heart of the person. They have techniques but they don't preach a changed heart.

All believers either have something to teach or something to learn, however when others will not listen nor will they seek, we are left with a vast void, a dearth of God's wisdom, an empty shell of a culture accomplishing nothing of value while demeaning and rejecting that which is valuable.
Here we are right now, with Bibles in nearly every home, churches on every other street corner and preachers in the media and yet, there is little wisdom being preached compared to the number of churches and preachers.

Amos 8:11
"Behold, days are coming," declares the Lord GOD, "When I will send a famine on the land, Not a famine for bread or a thirst for water, But rather for hearing the words of the LORD."

2 Timothy 4:3 "For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but wanting to have their ears tickled, they will accumulate for themselves teachers in accordance to their own desires,"

When we find ourselves being maligned and rejected for telling the truth of God's principles, knowing if only those hearing would accept them, their hearts and lives would change, in that order, the heart first and then the attitudes and actions will follow, we know we are living in the last days.

Matthew 15:18 ""But the things that proceed out of the mouth come from the heart, and those defile the man."

It is interesting that many people want others to fix their life for them, rather than doing the hard work needed to repair what they fashioned for themselves.

A good example was an experience I had many years ago. A woman coming from a wealthy family, who married a poor man. She had no experience in housekeeping because she had been raised with servants who did everything for her. Her husband came to me asking me to teach her how to keep and run a household, the wife seemed open too, so I agreed. This couple had lots of children, the woman was continually depressed, never got anything done in the house, frustrating her husband, he would come home having to make the dinner and clean house after spending all day at work, while she was at home.

I was happy to help, so I arranged a day to come to her house and begin instruction. Before that day arrived I developed a schedule for her to follow, sort of easing her into the process, knowing that too much all at once could overwhelm her and further discourage her. So, my plan was to give her a certain amount every day to do, beginning lightly and as she progressed over time doing more in a day.

I presented this plan to her, telling her not to look at the other days, she was to look only at the day she was in, to do only that day. I spent two hours with her and expected her to call me at the end of each day with her progress. At the end of the two hours she looked at me with frustration and said, "I thought you were going to help me." I explained that this was my help, that I had six children and a husband of my own and could not do anyone else's housework, unless they were ill, but I was happy to give her the schedule and receive phone calls any time she wanted.

It became clear that this young woman didn't want the kind of help I had to offer, what she wanted was for me to do the work for her. It became more evident as discussion progressed, I never heard from her again. I fear this is most of what we encounter in our culture today, many people don't want the skills taught to help them do their own work, they want others to do it for them.

Astonishingly, there are many who even want us to be their spirituality for them. There are people we encounter who want to be in the presence of the Lord, as Judas did, but they don't want to know Him and will abandon all semblance of spirituality when it doesn't meet with their idea of God or God's people. The churches are full of those who want God "their own way." Many of these people only have an appearance of spirituality when in the presence of other believers, but having little of their own when they are not with believers.

Probably the most frustrating dilemma of this time is the lack of interest in true spirituality. There is a lack of desire to ask God about anything except when they are in trouble. The irony of it is that if we knew the Word of God intimately, and I don't mean just knowledge of the stories, but principles for life, we may not get into the messes we get into. Obeying God's principles keeps us on track for avoiding pitfalls. When we find ourselves in a pitfall not of our own making, then we know what to do because we are intimate with Christ Who lives in us. Our mistakes are fewer and the remedy is quickly evidenced.

Christ is not an emergency stop gap measure to run to when something went wrong. We may find our prayers not being answered when we use God in this way. God is not interested in being a "stop gap measure", He desires an intimate relationships with us in which we seek Him everyday for all things. When we use Him and abuse Him, He will not answer when we really need Him.

Proverbs 1:28 ""Then they will call on me, but I will not answer; They will seek me diligently but they will not find me,"

The True Seekers Demonstrate Humility

Why do we have so many broken relationships, not only broken with God but also with people?  

The answer is simple, coming in two parts.  First and foremost is that we are not honestly desiring truth with all our hearts as a Christian culture, And, secondly we do not voice openly concerns and problems.  There is far too much secrecy going on in the church gatherings, hiding is a sign of guilt often.

I have said in my more snarky times, "we need to learn to open the appendages on the front of our face called lips, and speak our concerns, speak truth and then apply what we speak or apply before we speak, so that we are believable.  

The very least that anyone should be doing is praying, spending much time alone with God.  When we do this, we cannot help but share openly what we learn, sharing concerns, sharing the wisdom God is showing us.  

All those who are doing this, praying and seeking God, are finding one another, excited about all they are learning and experiencing, the evidence of what God is showing us.  

I have never met a person who was deeply in the Word, asking for wisdom and living what they know, who did not gush forth with enthusiasm for Christ in a very public way.

James 1:5 "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all generously and without reproach, and it will be given to him."

Colossians 3:16 "Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God."

Anyone who is angry at rebuke, angry at the suggestion that they are not obeying the Word, we can be sure we are speaking to someone who has a stubborn heart. Those who are seeking can't seem to get enough and take very seriously a correction.

2 Timothy 4:2 "preach the word; be ready in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort, with great patience and instruction."

Confession is Necessary for Cleansing

It is best to own our stuff and just say "I am sorry I was so unkind, please for give me." When someone goes this far, it is very likely they really mean it and probably will avoid repeating the offense.

When someone cannot do this, they most likely will repeat, because it was to easy to make it all go away without having to admit anything. Even AA encourages speaking it out as a means of deterrent for repeat offenses.

Luke 17:3 ""Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him."

James 5:16 "Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much."

Confession of sin is required for cleansing, it is less likely that someone will repeat sins they have openly confessed. Confession is truly a deterrent and help in repeat offenses of the same sins.

Fitting In Brings Bondage

Don't attempt to fit in!

When we are able to think for ourselves, guided by the Holy Spirit it is virtually impossible to be manipulated by controllers, whose only objective is to mold you into their shape while using you as a puppet for their purposes.

Our culture has the tendency to mock and demean anyone who does not do what the crowd thinks is right, this is not only in the world but it is also in the churches.

The crowd is almost always wrong, it is based on personal gratification and acceptance, rather than truth, while thinking with only one mind rather than all the minds working together to find truth.

Don't let people shape you into their mold based on cultural fads. Let the Holy Spirit, the Potter, shape our clay into His image, He is perfect and knows exactly what is needed for each of us.

Isaiah 64:8 "But now, O LORD, You are our Father, We are the clay, and You our potter; And all of us are the work of Your hand."

Do you want to be a cultural puppet dancing to the tune of the crowd? Or would you rather be a free thinker, free to think with the mind of Christ the perfecter of our faith?

In the culture there is bondage to the ways of man, in Christ there is freedom to pursue truth and wisdom.

Hebrews 12:2 "fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God."

Speaking Truth in the Power of the Holy Spirit

Have you ever been in a room full of people when someone spoke something foolish or just plain wrong about what they said, while the entire room remained silent, allowing the misinformed or arrogant one to have their say without challenge?

 

All too often the one who speaks sinful attitudes or even evil beliefs, gets away with it entirely because everyone else in the room are too nice to cause further discomfort by countering the foolishness. 

 

There are several problems with this, since the majority, whether they agree with the arrogant person or not will align themselves with the stronger personality just to fit in, avoiding shunning, leaves the weaker vessels with the impression that one should never cause trouble by challenging sinfulness. Never mind that the sinful person was allowed to have his say, but the righteous one is intimidated into silence for lack of support.

 

We have lost the ability as a culture to stand alone for what is right, giving up the opportunities to bring good sense to matters, we have abdicated our responsibility to speak truth, while the evil one has been allowed to carry on, influencing many who are weak.

We are called sheep in God's Word, when one sheep runs, all the others will do it too, without ever stopping to consider if there is a good reason to run.

 

People act like this often, they will automatically support and align themselves with the one everyone in the room seems to like without evaluating the situation objectively. 

 

If we are all in with Christ, then we will challenge anyone even a dear one we love, to bring truth to the table. No one is so special or elevated that we should risk holiness or truth to make them like us.

There is also an interesting twist to all this, if one person in the room full of people, gets violently angry, many if not most of the onlookers think the victim must have done something wrong. Narcissists count on this tactic to intimidate those who become their targets. Often it is the one who corrects who is seen as the trouble maker, rather than the one who has sinned.

 

When we have heroes and icons that we look up to, it is very hard to see the side of them that is not quite right. No one is right all the time, so why do sheep choose not to evaluate an icon or hero? The reason is that the person who has heroes, have placed their trust in them rather than in Christ. If a hero has a chink in their armor, they might not have a hero anymore, in fact the hero becomes the target when they no longer measure up. 

 

When we have trusted Christ we are able to love people God's way, with all their warts and personality flaws. When we have heroes we are more likely to fall hard when they don't measure up to our idea of perfection. Those who are prone to elevate people to this degree, cannot love anyone who they think does not measure up to their own ideas of wonderful. 

 

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away."

 

I have had relationships in Christ that were wonderful, some of them here on facebook. We may not agree on everything, but there is honor and respect expressed in the disagreement. Those who fight to win quickly drop off because the meanness is not tolerated, it is met with rebuke and removal if the one involved will not learn respect. 

 

I have written this in a post recently but thought it was worth posting again, the quote from Albert Einstein;

 

"The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it."

Training for the Millennium?

When we are focused on Christ, Who lives in us, we will be obeying Him, in whatever He is commanding us.

 

The more we focus on Him and our heavenly home the more useful we will be on earth.

 

Sadly many people are depending on an earthly government to bring them peace and wealth, they are worried and upset about all they see happening, mostly their comfort on this earth. They are repelled by the idea of loss of freedom and money, these things are nice and we have enjoyed this... for nearly as long as we have been a country, however it is not guaranteed by God, nor should it be our most important goal here. 

 

I have no worries because this earth is not my home. I am here on assignment, nothing here dominates my thinking except the lost souls who need Christ and to encourage the saints, while learning from them.

 

Brothers and sisters our focus out to be the body of Christ first and then the lost souls. In order to be useful in evangelism, we must also be building one another up in the faith, not for the purpose of encouragement alone, but to equip one another to stand strong in the face of opposition and to be a light in this sin sick world.

 

Matthew 5:16 ""Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven."

 

Do we realize our position in Christ, is seated with Him right now?

Ephesians 2:6-7 "6 and raised us up with Him, and seated us with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the ages to come He might show the surpassing riches of His grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus."

Our riches are not of this world, they are spiritual. When we desire wealth and freedom more than anything else we have forgotten that Christ was poor by our standards, the apostles were not wealthy, many gave up any thought of wealth to follow Christ, for the greater riches of spiritual blessings, such as greater faith, gratefulness for the sacrifice for payment of our sin, wisdom about life, direction for all things.

 

Is it possible that our life here on earth is our training for ruling in the Millennium? We are told that we will reign with Christ on this earth.

2 Timothy 2:12 "If we endure, we will also reign with Him; If we deny Him, He also will deny us;"

 

Revelation 20:4 "4 I saw thrones on which were seated those who had been given authority to judge. And I saw the souls of those who had been beheaded because of their testimony for Jesus and because of the word of God. They had not worshiped the beast or his image and had not received his mark on their foreheads or their hands. They came to life and reigned with Christ a thousand years."

 

Daniel 7:27 "27 Then the sovereignty, power and greatness of the kingdoms under the whole heaven will be handed over to the saints, the people of the Most High. His kingdom will be an everlasting kingdom, and all rulers will worship and obey him.'"

Don't Play At Dating

When a young person is dating it is good to recognize a narcissist before getting trapped in their web of deception. The first thing to remember is that it is wise to know the Word of God well, using it as the bench mark for evaluating the relationship with another person.

Whenever we see arrogance or resistance to the Word of God, even rage when challenged to evaluate everything in terms of the word, we can be sure we are dealing with a pretender and mocker. 

 

There cannot be enough warning about this matter of selfishness and phony spirituality in terms of anyone you might be considering for marriage. 

 

Remember that the deception can be so cleaver that it can only be seen when we spend lots of time evaluating responses to many experiences and how it relates to the Biblical description of a believer who walks in the Holy Spirit. 

 

It should be natural and without thinking to help another person in need. Someone who is selfless will not have to think about whether or not to help another person, nor will they have to be convinced to do it. A selfless person will jump right in without thinking, filling the need immediately. However a wise person will see signs of manipulation quickly and discern whether this person is really in need or having ulterior motives. 

 

The depth of a person's Scriptural understanding will be evidence in their discernment. A discerning person may not know all the details but the Holy Spirit will warn them, that something is not right and they will go to prayer about it, for God to reveal the problem. 

 

When we notice that someone we are dating is focused on pleasure and promotion of self through their responses to small things, we must then watch carefully for a time to discern their every day attitudes.

 

How does this person treat their own parents, how does this person respond to calamities in life, what is their response to criticism no matter how small? Defensiveness is a clue, rage is an even bigger clue. The selfish person will retaliate, often in covert ways others may not be able to see. The selfish person will not want to discuss important matters, they merely want hard things to go away without a hitch, leaving things unresolved. They are unwise because they believe difficult things will work themselves out. 

 

When we see we have become a target for cruelty because of a challenge, we should have the good sense to run like a rabbit from the relationship.

 

If physical attraction or attention to us is driving our involvement with a person, then we are headed for disaster in our choice of a spouse. Selfish people can display intense interest in us while dating, even using flattery often to keep us interested, this is not an indication of whether or not they would make a loving wise spouse.

 

Proverbs 26:24-28 "Whoever hates disguises himself with his lips and harbors deceit in his heart; when he speaks graciously, believe him not, for there are seven abominations in his heart; though his hatred be covered with deception, his wickedness will be exposed in the assembly. Whoever digs a pit will fall into it, and a stone will come back on him who starts it rolling. A lying tongue hates its victims, and a flattering mouth works ruin. "

 

There is really no excuse for being caught in a marriage that is a disaster, except that we have followed our feelings while refusing to see the signs. Many people get caught in bad marriages because everything they think, is based on the attention and flattery they experience before the marriage.

 

Even associations in terms of friends and relatives ought to be based on a kinship in Christ, not blood, not flattery, not success or any other worldly trapping.

 

Proverbs 29:5 "A man that flattereth his neighbour spreadeth a net for his feet."

 

When we have a kinship in Christ, we ought to be able to express our viewpoints, even in disagreements without the other person demeaning, manipulating, mocking or raising their voice to intimidate. When we see these things happening, we know a truly godly relationships will be impossible. 

 

Mutual respect for one another is demonstrated in a loving discussion based on coming to an agreement through Scripture. Those who have a desire to be elevated above us continually, will not stop in one discussion, they will make us a target for rejection and reputation destruction. Those who mock and demean others will not stop, they will diminish you about everything you do. Their goal is to make you feel as small as they can as often as they can, because they must conquer you to feel superior to you. They will not stop at just you, they will attempt to pull others into the mix, making you appear evil or crazy, no narcissist wants to be the only one who hates their target.

 

I sense that I cannot warn young people enough about this phenomena of narcissism that is growing in these end times. It is hard enough to keep a marriage together in these days when most people accept divorce and remarriage as natural and normal. When we know God teaches that marriage is until death, we must be wise in our choice. We cannot be wise when we don't know the Word of God and when we are overtaken by appearance and fleshly flattery.

 

Narcissists are often obsessed with physical appearance, evaluating success in terms of prestige in the community or wealth. 

Marriage is far more than what we think we see in dating circumstances. Most people getting married today don't want the adult version of self sacrifice, mutual respect and honor. Most people getting married today want the child's version, the fun stuff not based on anything substantive or deeply worthwhile.

 

The bottom lines is this; unless the new marriages are based on the principles of Christ, knowing the Word intimately, character qualities outlined there, then the possibility of a marriage lasting is very slim in our present culture.

 

Deuteronomy 4:29 ""But from there you will seek the LORD your God, and you will find Him if you search for Him with all your heart and all your soul."

 

Jeremiah 29:13 "13 You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart. "

 

Do not go into dating or marriage thinking your good looks, money and flattery are going to make a good marriage, this thinking will ruin anyone who lives by it. 

 

1 Chronicles 16:11

"Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face continually."

 

Evaluate, question and test, while watching the response to these tests on the part of the potential spouse. And most of all, seek God every day before marriage, never let emotions guide your thinking or decisions. God will warn those who want to hear from Him. Listen to the warnings, pray when not sure and obey when God says to evacuate! Lastly, be willing to wait on the Lord, when you wait on the Lord you will not be disappointed. It is better to be alone waiting on God with the potential of a lovely godly spouse, than it is to be stuck in a terrible marriage for the rest of your life, which is the expectation when we are believers. When we make those vows, it is done, God makes the two one and no man can undo that. 

 

Matthew 19:4-6 "He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” 

 

A marriage guided by God will not be perfect, because we forget to consult Him, but it will be solid, things will become resolved and love will grow.

 

Ecclesiastes 4:12 "And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart."

Ephesians 6:11 "Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil."

 

Amos 3:7 "“For the Lord God does nothing without revealing his secret to his servants the prophets."

 

Final note, never let anyone into your life after marriage that will attempt to divide the marriage. There will be people who think they know us, they think they know the depth of our relationships when they do not. They will sow seeds of distrust and dissention into the marriage to divide, often for the purpose of gaining the trust of one of the parties in the marriage to manipulate them. Get those people out of the relationship, they have the potential of causing great damage.

 

Romans 16:17-18 "17 Now I urge you, brethren, note those who cause divisions and offenses, contrary to the doctrine which you learned, and avoid them. 18 For those who are such do not serve our Lord Jesus Christ, but their own belly, and by smooth words and flattering speech deceive the hearts of the simple."

 

Each marriage must decide for themselves how they will live and what they believe about the Word of God. No one should be allowed to enter that relationship that will divide. There are those who believe everyone should think just like they do, if they do not think like they do, they begin their covert acts of manipulation to divide. God states that we should not allow divisive people in the church gathering, neither should we allow them in our marriages.

 

Proverbs 6:16-19 These six things the Lord hates,

Yes, seven are an abomination to Him:

17 A proud look,

A lying tongue,

Hands that shed innocent blood,

18 A heart that devises wicked plans,

Feet that are swift in running to evil,

19 A false witness who speaks lies,

And ONE WHO SOWS DISCORD AMONG BRETHREN.

Only If Our Budget Will Handle It

The little house I grew up in, out in the country. This house had only studs for wall in the early years for four years before my parents could afford sheet rock. There was never a mortgage and the house only grew larger as my parents could afford and the work was done by my father.
My parents didn't buy what they could not afford, nor did they want what they couldn't have. One of the most valuable lessons they taught me was to only buy what you can afford to pay for yourself and never anything unnecessary unless there was extra money after the bills were all paid, one of the bills was a little savings in the bank.
Is anyone teaching these principles anymore? We weren't rich, but we had everything we needed and a little extra for a rainy day.

 

So many young people don't want to grow slowly, they feel they must have everything right now, rather than saving and waiting for what they have worked hard to earn. We take better care of things when we work hard to get them.

The Signs Are Here, Listen for the Trumpet

As a famous preacher once said, "I am no longer looking for the signs of the Lord's return, they are so many we can't miss them, I am now listening for the trumpet."

We Must Correct Bad Doctrine

Has any of you experienced someone calling you out for exposing a false teacher or correcting a teacher who is not false but in error about something?
 
The Bible clearly teaches that we are to question all things, even correcting someone in public if the statements that were in error, were in public.

I Corinthians 14:29-33...
"29 Let two or three prophets speak, and let the others pass judgment. 30 But if a revelation is made to another who is seated, the first one must keep silent. 31 For you can all prophesy one by one, so that all may learn and all may be exhorted; 32 and the spirits of prophets are subject to prophets; 33 for God is not a God of confusion but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints."

In our present culture it has become considered rude to correct someone and detestable to do it in a public setting, and yet this is what our Lord said to do. Any preacher who cannot be challenged without feeling irritated by it, is one who is not only acting unBiblicly but also suffering from arrogance.
 
Below is a link to a very good article on the subject of correcting and challenging wrong teaching!

http://www.christiandoctrine.net/doctrine/articles/article_00085_what_is_a_railing_accusation_web.htm

The Godly Stive with the Wicked

Proverbs 28:4-5
"4 Those who forsake the law praise the wicked,
But those who keep the law strive with them.
5 Evil men do not understand justice,
But those who seek the Lord understand all things."

They Hated the Prophets!

Micah was the prophet who never had anything nice to say......gee wonder why! LOL

Are you accused of being negative all the time, do people avoid you because you are always correcting or spouting irritating Bible verses?
 
You are in good company, all the prophets were hated continually.

The Pack Mentality

A clue about a family structure of narcissism, is that all those who hear the gossip or hold grudges on behalf of others, never care about finding out the truth, they prefer to believe the gossip.
When asked to say why they are angry at their target they refuse to divulge the reason for their anger and contempt, probably because they are not sure they have a reason, but they want to be friends with the narcissist.

Please don't agonize over the loss of a friend who will listen to gossip without bothering to come and talk about it. How they come makes a difference too. If they love us they will come in humility desiring to hear our side of the story. If they are evil, they will come in an accusatory tone, hoping to catch us in something. Those who come in an accusatory tone, are not interested in finding truth, but only interested in injuring you further.
 

There is a pack mentality in human beings too. We seldom see a person who is willing to stand against the pack, never mind whether what they are doing is right or wrong. We see this in politics, families, churches, nearly every institution we deal with there is a pack mentality.

Pack Mentality: "1.The tendency for groups of individuals to act together without planned direction."
Mankind has a tendency to feel the need to fit into the pack. When the pack is doing something wrong, those who have somewhat of a conscience, will not want to do the evil, so they will sheepishly stand back to allow the pack to proceed, but never say a word to discourage the pack.
These spineless people are more concerned about being accepted than they are about truth and righteousness.

In the Psychological industry these followers of the pack who do not discourage the evil, are called "flying monkeys." They do whatever others want them to do, except when it may get them into trouble, then they employ a tactic called "plausible deniability." They do nothing to stop the pack, they do not leave the pack, but they stand in a corner as though they are not involved, able to say at the end of it, "I wasn't involved."

My take on the flying monkey, is this; if they are there and they said and did nothing to stop evil, then they are culpable for all that happened.

How Serious is Dishonor of Parents?

Often adult children base their contempt for parents on what they perceived to be wrong when they were small. I was accused at times for being mean because I didn't want my children to go to bad movies. I expected them to pick up after themselves, help with yard work and other normal activities, often met with anger and contempt for having to do these things.

Because of the rebellion, they concocted in their heart that I was mean without remembering why they felt that way at the time they were young. When parents have boundaries and standards, in a culture that mocks them, then the children will think the parent is mean, when it is the society that is wrong.

Interestingly, many adult children have forgotten all the sacrifices and efforts to protect and help them learn, that the parent spent, what seemed like a lifetime, their lifetime, doing.

When a culture reaches the point that adult children are commonly rejecting the parents, their wisdom and their instruction, we have reached the point of no return as a nation.

It is impossible to train, teach and influence a rebellious people who have turned their back on their parents. It is a direct and explicit command of God to honor them without conditions associated to it. These same rebellious generations will have no more respect for God than they do their parents. The mentality of rebellion against authority does not end with only parents, it spills over onto anyone who will expect accountability.

Many adult children today have an idea of how they want their parents to act, that may not even be Biblical, it is their idea rather than the principles of Christ that motivate them to disregard and demean their parents. They are living in a world of self aggrandizement, elevating their own ideas above God and above the many years of life experience of their parents.

Little do they understand that God takes this horrific rebellion against parents so seriously that death was the punishment before the age of grace. After the age of grace, the intensity of the evil didn't diminish, it remained the same, however the way we deal with it is different. In the OT dispensation we are told to have these rebels stoned, but in the age of grace we are to remove ourselves and let God deal with them. In 2 Timothy 3:1-5 we see that God no longer tells us to destroy the adult children who act rebelliously, we are to leave them to God, but the command in verse 5 is to remove ourselves from them.

2 Timothy 3:1-5
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."

Proverbs 30:17 "The eye that mocketh at his father, and despiseth to obey his mother, the ravens of the valley shall pick it out, and the young eagles shall eat it."

Ungratefulness is rampant in our culture in this generation of entitlement. When we think we deserve something, there is contempt toward the one that will not give us our desires or the one who requires accountability and respect.

Proverbs 28:24 "He who robs his father or his mother And says, "It is not a transgression," Is the companion of a man who destroys."

Proverbs 30:11 "There is a kind of man who curses his father And does not bless his mother."

Deuteronomy 21:18-21 ""If any man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father or his mother, and when they chastise him, he will not even listen to them, then his father and mother shall seize him, and bring him out to the elders of his city at the gateway of his hometown. "They shall say to the elders of his city, 'This son of ours is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey us, he is a glutton and a drunkard.' read more. Then all the men of his city shall stone him to death; so you shall remove the evil from your midst, and all Israel will hear of it and fear."

Exodus 21:15 ""He who strikes his father or his mother shall surely be put to death."

Leviticus 20:9 "'If there is anyone who curses his father or his mother, he shall surely be put to death; he has cursed his father or his mother, his bloodguiltiness is upon him."

Deuteronomy 21:18 ""If any man has a stubborn and rebellious son who will not obey his father or his mother, and when they chastise him, he will not even listen to them,"

Micah 7:6 "For son treats father contemptuously, Daughter rises up against her mother, Daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law; A man's enemies are the men of his own household."

I fear that our culture does not take sin seriously enough and because of this, the culture is becoming more wicked with each new generation.