I recently saw a post in which someone was lamenting the fact that a cross marking the roadside place of death, had been destroyed by vandals. Personally I am not for the ritual of placing a cross at the road side. I presume it might be a warning to others to be more careful on the highway, however I fear that sometimes it is more of a remembrance of the person who died there.
Upon reflection I feel it is a little macabre, to commemorate where someone died, it seems more appropriate to honor his life not his death, unless they are a believer, then we can celebrate their home going.
1 Corinthians 15:55 ""O DEATH, WHERE IS YOUR VICTORY? O DEATH, WHERE IS YOUR STING?"
1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 "
13 But we do not want you to be uninformed, brethren, about those who are asleep, so that you will not grieve as do the rest who have no hope.
14 For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so God will bring with Him those who have fallen asleep in Jesus.
15 For this we say to you by the word of the Lord, that we who are alive and remain until the coming of the Lord, will not precede those who have fallen asleep.
16 For the Lord Himself will descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel and with the trumpet of God, and the dead in Christ will rise first.
17 Then we who are alive and remain will be caught up together with them in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air, and so we shall always be with the Lord.
18 Therefore comfort one another with these words."
The world is full of meaningless rituals that produce nothing outside of good feelings temporarily. Often the Lord allows us to go through the dark valleys that we might search for Him. He is the only means by which we can derive comfort in times of deep sorrow. Playacting with ritual only scratches the surface with superficial strokes, that do not last and cannot be a catalyst to growth, perhaps even preventing it because the focus is feelings rather than depth of character.
Speaking to the grave as though the person is in it, is another worthless activity concocted by psychology to help a person to feel better. Sometimes we try to take away the sting of life for people, when all we do is pretend to make things better, when time, prayer and faith is needed to carry on.
Our culture tends to look for quick fixes and superficial frosting, only delaying the inevitable wound, that must happen for someone to begin to seek Christ.
We like to gloss over the pain, so we don't have to deal with others, instead of getting down there with them, that their pain would be borne by others.
Who was it that said; "a trial that is shared is half a trial, and a trial alone is twice the trial."?
Believers are meant to share one another's burdens.
Galatians 6:2 "Bear one another's burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ."
When we substitute speaking to a dead person for weeping with a live person, we become more solitary and less open to the body of Christ.
Romans 12:15 "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep."
People in the grave cannot hear us, nor can those who have gone to heaven, they are gone and only their lifeless shell remains in that grave. Pretending that they are there does not make it so, denying truth has no healing power.
Doing things God's way has power, letting go, realizing that dead person is no longer with us, helps us rely more on Christ and less on the memory of someone who will no longer walk with us.
The answer: Walk so closely with Christ that when someone passes there is no longer a need to pretend they are with us. Christ is always with us when we are born again. When all others have left us, He is still with us, we must depend on Him alone.
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