Believers in Christ, care about everyone and love as Christ loved, but to be deeply invested in whether or not others approve of us will only serve to bring us into bondage to them rather than enjoying freedom in Christ.
John 12:42-43 "42 Nevertheless, many of the leaders believed in Him; but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, for fear that they would be put out of the synagogue. 43 For they loved praise from men more than praise from God. "
Giving up our standards and the personality God gave us to please others is a sort of bondage for us.
When we are sold out to Christ we only have One Who must approve of us, God the Father, and it is on the basis of our decision to trust Jesus Christ. When God has accepted us it is not because we measure up but because we have the ONE inside of us Who does measure up, that is Jesus Christ.
Living a life of continual fear that someone might discover we are not perfect, can be nothing more than a self imposed prison. When we are free in Christ we know we are not perfect, we can openly confess our problems and issues without reservation for the purpose of cleansing. Christ will not cleanse someone who refuses to admit they need it, however when we do confess and are cleansed, all pretense and self exaltation is removed.
If we find ourselves unable to be authentic around someone without punishment for it, then that is the time to consider removing ourselves. Pretense is a cruel task master, it keeps those controlled by it in a continual state of stress, while tearing down those that have been judged by it.
When we are accepted by others with all our warts and flaws, as we accept others with all their warts and flaws, then we can appreciate one another's struggles and blessings! We do not require someone to be our version of perfect to love them, because we love the way Christ loved, "in spite of us."
Black and white thinking, meaning those who can only assess anyone as either all bad or all good, are not judging from the Word of God but from their own humanistic expectations that are not based on truth but their own personal desires. Anyone who thinks like this usually has themselves in the "all good" column. These expectations have to do with whether or not others fawn over them as perfect human beings.
Comparing ourselves one to another is ungodly and arrogant. It is when we compare ourselves to God that leaves every single person who does this, realizing how woefully inadequate they are in terms of their goodness.
Romans 3:9-11 "9 What then? Are we any better? Not at all. For we have already made the charge that Jews and Greeks alike are all under sin. 10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; 11 There is no one who understands; no one who seeks God.…"
When we love someone we will enjoy their accomplishments with them and correct them where necessary. But we will never use covert and mean spirited manipulation to hurt them or beat them into submission.
Romans 12:14-16 "14 Bless those who persecute you. Bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but enjoy the company of the lowly. Do not be conceited.…"
I have encountered people over the years who could not bring themselves to laugh at a joke told by the person for which they have contempt. They withheld laughter and joy in order to diminish the laughter and joy of the one they hate.
I have also witnessed those who could not compliment or engage in joy with another person when they were jealous of that person. When someone withholds in the form of refusing to share in the joy and heartache of another, they are most likely someone who cannot validate another person who does not elevate them. Their aim is to devalue the person by minimizing their experiences in life, perhaps even judging them as silly and meaningless, while at the same time expecting others to engage with them in all their own emotions.
Sneaky mean tactics are of the devil, they do not belong in the lives of the born again believer. Judging others without speaking to them is also of the devil. The devil loves to keep people from working things out or hearing their need for instruction to change, he wants the trials of human relationships to continue, increasing in intensity and frequency.
1 Peter 5:7-9 "…7 Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. 8 Be sober-minded and alert. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in your faith and in the knowledge that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of suffering.…"
It is impossible to maintain a relationship with those who cause others pain and refuse to hear a correction. It is correction, confession and forgiveness that restores broken relationships, all three elements are needed. As long as there is someone who will not listen, be honest and authentic, even continuing their role as trouble maker, there can be no reconciliation.
The same is true in coming to Christ. Our relationship with human beings are a microcosm of the relationship of Christ to His church and each born again believer. If we cannot do what we should with Christ, we will not do as we should with our fellow human beings and vise versa.
How we feel about God is reflected in our attitude about others. If we demonstrate superiority toward man we will think we are above God too.
Proverbs 11:2
"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom."
Proverbs 29:23
"One's pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor."
James 4:6
"But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”"
No comments:
Post a Comment