Not forgiving an unrepentant offender is not bitterness it is commanded by God. We bless those who curse us and remove ourselves from those who do not repent. We make sure we do no harm to anyone even if they harm us, but this is not forgiveness.
Confession and forgiveness are two sides of the same coin and for the purpose of reconciling a relationship. If one person is not sorry for offending then we are not required to reconcile the relationship.
Notice the offender is the one coming each time to confess their sin to be reconciled.
Confession of sin and forgiveness are two sides of the same coin. Lack of accountability does not help someone to repent, it solidifies a hardened heart further, the hard heart of the one who will not repent.
Notice we hear a lot about forgiving unrepentant sinners but we hear nothing about chastising unrepentant sinners to confess to be cleansed. It is backward from what God taught.
We are not bitter because someone else will not repent, we remain concerned and pray for them. If we love someone we will be more concerned about their spiritual well being than we are for their feelings.
God's character is not only love, because it is love it is also justice and reconciliation.
Reconciliation cannot happen without repentance, not toward God or anyone else. God will not reconcile Himself to anyone who is not repentant, He is our life model.
Our modern world has been taught to "just let it all go", and if we don't we are bitter, this mentality produces more sin and less conviction of it. It is also lazy, just "letting it go" lets us off the hook of doing the hard work to help one another grow emotionally and spiritually.
If you went to the doctor with a severe illness for which there was a cure would you like to hear; "just let it go no need to do anything maybe being nice to you will fix it."
If the fence in your yard were broken and the neighbor's cattle were coming in and trampling your garden would you like to hear from the neighbor; "no problem just ignore it and I will be nice to you."
Personal relationships are far more important than these other things and yet they are the things most neglected. Temporary personal feelings are more of a priority these days than development of good and loving connections with people.
Nothing is mended by ignoring it, no relationships can be trusted when there is continual disrespect. We live in a "pretend" culture that thinks all we have to do is pretend something wasn't a problem and it will all go away. This is the devil's lie, his hope is that nothing will be mended and everyone walks around on pins and needles hoping that one day someone will stop hating just because they get tired of it.
Relationships are not like this, people are not like animals. If you treat an animal with kindness they will love you, but people are not like this. Often people see kindness as weakness and exploit it, seeing it as an opportunity to demean and degrade the one who walks in love.
Love embarrasses narcissists, they see it as feebleness and they despise anyone they think is feeble. With a narcissistic person "just letting it go" affords them the sense of pleasure to repeat their offenses.
Christ did nothing but good to the entire world and yet the world hated Him. He shone His light of goodness on the world exposed their darkness, this made them angry so they killed Him and His apostles.
Doing good to a rebellious person is like lighting a match to gasoline. We should never stop doing good all the time but when we see the fire was lit and there is no reconciliation then God tells us to walk away leaving them to God.
The more we remain with ungodly people who reject truth the more likely we are to emulate their sinful reactions. We must guard our hearts from those who wish to corrupt us through their continual antics of ill will.
"From such turn away" God says in 2 Timothy 3:5
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