Just as many in our culture today, narcissists interpret our responses in terms of how they would feel if they were responding instead of us.
For example; when we ask a friend to correct the date on a paper they are giving us, rather than smile and do it with gladness, they become irritated as though we did something wrong in asking for the correction.
Why would this happen, why the angst instead of the loving compliance? The reason is that if the narcissist were asking for a date change they would be angry that we were stupid enough to make a mistake and they would demand that we fix it while they are shaming us for the mistake.
They think that we are doing what they would do if the situation was reversed. Narcissists cannot see what is really happening, they will interpret everything in terms of shame and guilt as a means of control over the emotions of others.
If we were asking a narcissist to do something for us, they would assume we were attempting to control them. They believe we are attempting to control them because if they were asking us for something they would be attempting to control us.
This is why they have so much anger expressed continually. They are angry and assume we are angry. They have hatred when they do things with others and assume the others are angry at them.
If we were to give a gift to a narcissist they assume we are trying to manipulate them because if they gave a gift to us they would be manipulating us.
If a narcissist says we are lying, its because they lie all the time. If a narcissist says we were angry at them, they are revealing they were angry at us.
These are all ploys of the devil. Those who are full-on narcissists are being played by the devil. He is controlling their emotions and their words. When we encounter them and the encounter seems irrational and untrue, then we can assume it is the devil in control.
This is why we have no need to feel defensive or respond to it, we know where it comes from and it is not about us or toward us, it is toward the Holy Spirit Who lives in us.
We can expect to experience more of this irrational thinking and response in these last days. As 2 Timothy 3 states very clearly what we are watching in these end times, we are watching "raging insanity" take place, growing more blatant every day.
2 Timothy 3
1 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, slanderers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 holding to a form of godliness although they have denied its power; avoid such people as these.
6 For among them are those who slip into households and captivate weak women weighed down with sins, led on by various impulses,
7 always learning and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
8 Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so these men also oppose the truth, men of depraved mind, worthless in regard to the faith.
9 But they will not make further progress; for their foolishness will be obvious to all, just as was that also of Jannes and Jambres.
10 Now you followed my teaching, conduct, purpose, faith, patience, love, perseverance,
11 persecutions, and sufferings, such as happened to me at Antioch, at Iconium, and at Lystra; what persecutions I endured, and out of them all the Lord rescued me!
12 Indeed, all who want to live in a godly way in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.
13 But evil people and impostors will proceed from bad to worse, deceiving and being deceived.
14 You, however, continue in the things you have learned and become convinced of, knowing from whom you have learned them,
15 and that from childhood you have known the sacred writings which are able to give you the wisdom that leads to salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.
16 All Scripture is inspired by God and beneficial for teaching, for rebuke, for correction, for training in righteousness;
17 so that the man or woman of God may be fully capable, equipped for every good work."
As born-again believers, we have overcome the devil by the power of the Holy Spirit. We need not fear him or those whom he uses.
Hallelujah!!!
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