Acts 16:30-31 "…30 Then he brought them out and asked, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” 31 They replied, “Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, you and your household.” 32 Then Paul and Silas spoke the word of the Lord to him and to everyone in his house.…"
1 John 2:19-20 " 19 They went out from us, but they did not belong to us. For if they had belonged to us, they would have remained with us. But their departure made it clear that none of them belonged to us. 20 You, however, have an anointing from the Holy One, and all of you know the truth.…"
When we became born again, me first and then ten years later my husband we began to see the jealousy and anger in others in the family, as though we had done a strange evil thing. Often our households hate us when they no longer have control over our thinking. They love to hold past forgiven sins against us because they hate that we are a new person, they would rather have the old person back so they can continue to feel superior.
2 Corinthians 5:16-18 "…16 So from now on we regard no one according to the flesh. Although we once regarded Christ in this way, we do so no longer. 17 Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away. Behold, the new has come! 18 All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation:…"
Many years ago we were very sinful, during the beginning of our marriage neither of us were born again. We bought into many of the lies of the liberal culture in which we lived. Both of us were living in rebellion against the Lord and didn't even think what we were doing was bad.
When the Lord changed me into a new creation after confessing my sinfulness, the conflict in our marriage and among extended family began to grow worse. They liked me when I was sinful, but hated when I found Christ, even attempting to hold past sins against me as though nothing had changed. I was alone a lot in family gatherings as my husband sided with unsaved members of the family as they pummeled me with insults and the silent treatment. Even to this day family members judge me as being or doing things that are not true, based on their own imaginations about me, focusing on the memories of us from 40 years ago rather than seeing clearly the change in us.
To this very day extended family hate what we have become, born again, sold out followers of Jesus Christ. It offended them more when we became born again than when we were lost and in sin.
Sadly, some of these extended family are believers, or so they say. They have been judging me based on 40 years ago rather than rejoicing in the changed me, the one who no longer walks in those sins but has been faithful to Christ for the past 40 years. They choose me as the target because my husband has always been sort of silent, he was an accomplished engineer, politician and business owner, so they elevated him above me, the lowly homemaker.
However, I must add that I was a target as the scapegoat in my family all my life because of intense jealousy in the family. I never knew what the jealousy was about, but I know what it looks like when I see it.
Jealousy often manifests itself in exclusionary tactics, not commenting on things that are not sins or are not bad ideas, but even good accomplishments, just that I said them, therefore they are not worthy of attention. Narcissists get jealous whenever their target is happy and staunch about their own direction and beliefs. There may have been other reasons too, but it was clear from the treatment of me, that they could not bring themselves to validate me on any level even when what I was doing was a good thing. This is common among those who love to be superior to others.
There are those who are self righteous, they really believe they have never sinned and that they deserve prizes and praises for their perfect life. Of course it is not true, but their continual elevation of self has caused their walk with the Lord to deteriorate into trite mantra's and legalistic actions that make them appear spiritual, but have no power in the Lord for spiritual growth.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 "2
"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.
2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,
3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,
4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
These legalistic and self righteous ones do not grow in holiness. They love to look at others with condescending eyes searching for reasons to diminish the character of others while towering over others spiritually, in their own minds.
These self righteous types have no love in their hearts, there is no room for loving others when they are too busy loving themselves. The loftiness of the soul can never bring one to humility, kindness, empathy and love.
Why do I write about this? The reason is simple, many believers live in circumstances where they were once in sin but have been born again, but continually endure the hate of those who love to maintain the idea they had of us when we were in sin. They love to interpret everything we do as sinful when it is merely obedience to Christ. These people walk in pride, know they have a problem with it, so they have to make the authentic believer appear worthless and helpless.
The good news is that the authentic believer is free from the need to be elevated in the eyes of others. They have been forgiven by God, they no longer walk according to their own ways, their joy is full and grows every day.
The solution; learn to ignore those who are elevated in their own eyes, continue on with Christ in confidence that He sees all and is all you need. Do not allow unspiritual, unscriptural nay sayers, who use many covert tactics, to influence your walk, they are to be removed and ignored. As God says in 2 Timothy 3:5, "from such turn away."
We are to either surround ourselves with those who love Christ and love us or we may have to remain alone with Christ to continue our walk without the hindrance of those who love to destroy what we have in Christ. Hallelujah!!!
"The joy of the Lord is my strength." Neh.8:10
"Greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world." 1 John 4:4
"No weapon that is formed against you will prosper..." Is.54:17
“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.” Rom.15:13
“Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness.” James 1:2
“This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Ps.118:24
“For you shall go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall break forth into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.” Is. 55:12
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