Our culture has been taught for many years now, since the 1960s that the head-covering mentioned in the Bible in 1 Corinthians 11 had to do with the woman's submission to her husband. Sadly this has been incorrect and led many men to think it means they can oppress and demean their wives.
In the Bible instructions of the woman are to be covered it does not have to do with submission to the husband but to Christ.
The Bible teaches that the head covering is not the relationship between men and women but their relationship together to Christ.
The woman's symbol of authority on her head relates to her authority as the church. The husband's head uncovered relates to the authority of Christ under God.
Women have done away with the head covering in the western parts of the world because they view the head covering as something to do with being under the headship of the husband. They often use the excuse that the head-covering no longer applies but in the same passage God speaks of the men being uncovered and that is practice in every church.
A woman is under the headship of her husband but the symbol of the headcovering has to do with her authority under Christ in her role as the counselor in the household.
The husband and wife together lead the family as the husband leads and the woman counsels him. Just as the DCPI counsels the police chief, the relationship is very similar. No one is above someone else but the roles are different and the DCPI defers to the police commissioner when they disagree. The position of the DCPI is crucial in its function to help counsel the police chief.
The husband is the head of the family leading by example and teaching not by force, intimidation, or bossiness. He is to lead in a loving way deeply concerned about the welfare of his family. Bossiness without love is not leading Biblically. Christ never forced anyone, He spoke truth and allowed others to make their own decision. Their decision revealed if they loved Him or not, but there was never force.
The woman has been given the authority over the household as she is the homemaker mentioned in Proverbs 31. She dictates the going on in the household as she determines the function even monitoring the moral character of the household.
Proverbs 1:8-9 )
"My son, hear the instruction of your father, And do not forsake the law of your mother; For they will be a graceful ornament on your head And chains about your neck."
The woman's influence in the family can be intense if the father supports her as she carries out her job as counselor and CEO.
The woman submits at times to her husband just as we all should submit to others when appropriate. She does not submit out of fear of his wrath but out of love for him and in obedience to God. If he intimidates and demeans he is walking in hate and against the word of God. The wife is not to obey her husband if he tells her to sin, she must obey God rather than man in such cases.
Ephesians 5:24-26 …24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her 26 to sanctify her, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word,…
Ephesians 5:20-21 "…20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. 21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."
Christ died for His church, therefore the husband should be like Christ in completely sacrificial to his wife for her good, not for his own desires and musings. Husband's lead and submit in protection of his wife. She is not an object to be used for the husband's glory, but a vessel who belongs to God to be protected and nurtured.
Only a man of God Who obeys Scripture can be loving and kind. A worldly man will dominate just to be in charge without regard to the well being of the family.
1 Peter 5:3
"Not domineering over those in your charge, but being examples to the flock."
Titus 1:7
"For an overseer, as God's steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain,"
1 Peter 5:2
"Shepherd the flock of God that is among you, exercising oversight, not under compulsion, but willingly, as God would have you; not for shameful gain, but eagerly;"
These passages refer to leaders in the church but are applicable to marriage as well.
Titus 2:7
"Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity and dignity."
The man who thinks he is to lead by bossing, manipulating, and mean-spirited force is not walking with God but is defying the Law of love God commanded everyone to walk in.
Those men and women who are walking in the Spirit will have the fruit of the Spirit of God.
Galatians 5:22-23 - "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law."
Every believer is to submit to every other believer when appropriate. Obviously, we do not submit to someone who wants us to sin or violate our own convictions. When others obey God and ask us to do things that do not violate our convictions or sin, then we must obey God and submit wherever possible.
Ephesians 5:20-21 "…20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. 21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."
Notice this theme throughout God's Word, everyone submitting to everyone else out of reverence for Christ. We don't do it to gain something for ourselves but always for Christ. Sometimes He will tell us not to submit because what we have been asked to do violates the principles of God or may come against God's will for us.
1 Corinthians 16:14
"Do everything in love. Let all that you do be done with love. Keep your eyes open, hold tight to your convictions, give it all you've got, be resolute,"
When there is love there will not be rudeness, lies, mocking, gossiping, wrongly judging or demeaning.
Those who experience Christ's love extended for them will be able to see that it is love.
Those who experience the devilish manipulation and unkindness of the ungodly will see that it is not from God. Feel free to ignore it and refuse to be sucked into their trap.
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