Self Esteem is at it Again

Many families are experiencing estrangement from adult children because the children are narcissistically hyper sensitive to any kind of advice, instruction or correction after they become adults.

It was normal and natural when we were first married for parents or in law parents to correct or instruct. Because of the self esteem teaching, adult children are of the mind that no one should ever counter anything they do, they should just always agree with them or validate them.

It is sad to watch because without elder input into our lives we can't grow. When we got married we felt it was better to learn from the advice and stories of our elders than to have to go through the same problems they did.

I remember taking my father to a house we were thinking of buying to get his opinion about the soundness of the structure. He had build his own house and was wise in many things pertaining to buildings. I really liked the house we were considering a lot, but when he saw it he warned us about dry rot, a bad foundation in one place we would not have noticed. He told us that it would be a bad investment. We didn't buy the house because of his advice.

Both sets of parents on both sides spoke their mind about things, we never got angry, stomped off or cut them out of our lives. But this is what is happening now to many aging parents. The grandchildren are being deliberately withheld from many parents because of the narcissistic need to punish aging parents who do not elevate their children. Adult children now expect to be treated special all the time. They loathe being just plain people like everyone else.

We appreciated the input of our parents and took it as advice we could evaluate and make our own decision. Not so today, any advice is seen as an attack, all sense of reasonable discussion is forbidden without dire consequences.

The hyper sensitivity of the 40 somethings generation is irrational and volatile. The slightest disagreement is enough to cause a war and estrangement.

I have read many articles of broken-hearted aging parents who could not figure out why they were being banished from their children and the lives of their grandchildren. All they could figure out was that the adult children were angry at a comment they made or something they wouldn't give to the adult child.

We can guess that the problem was pride and anger in the child that was irrational because when the adult child was asked to explain why they were so angry they would refuse to tell the parents.

There is only one solution to this problem as I see it, that is to allow the angry adult child to walk away, get on with our own lives and pray that some day they will deal with their anger and realize that it was over blown. Even if there was an offense, usually it is a minor thing that most rational people would shrug off or see as a personality quirk.

So how is all that self esteem teaching working out for us? I don't remember this much estrangement from adult children when we were young, it truly is a new phenomena and in my opinion directly related to the continual indoctrination that made children feel entitled to special treatment.

We should resolved to enjoy the life we have with our spouse while praying for the children. We should never allow angry adult children to overshadow our relationship with our spouse. Why ruin a good thing because of a person who is not present in our lives and will not care about resolving a matter.

Harsh Rebukes Are Necessary

Christ was not always soft spoken, we can't hear His tone when He was driving out the money changers in the temple, but I am quite sure He was not speaking softly.

Christ also called people vipers and white washed tombs. We have to allow people to be led by the Holy Spirit in their tone.

Also, most of the time we don't need to be "snarky", but there are those times when God tells us to give a harsh rebuke. The problem is that our culture has eliminated the harsh rebuke altogether when at times it may have been needed.

Titus 1:13 "13 This testimony is true. Therefore rebuke them sternly, so that they will be sound in the faith, "

Remember too that we will be accused of a harsh tone when there was none, because rebellious people don't want to hear truth.

Proverbs 27:6 "…5 Better is open rebuke Than love that is concealed. 6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend, But deceitful are the kisses of an enemy. "

Proverbs 27:5 "Better is open rebuke than hidden love."

Titus 2:15 "Declare these things; exhort and rebuke with all authority. Let no one disregard you."

Seek God Rather Than Man

Read Your Bible and Pray!

Every born again believer has Christ in them, therefore they have everything they need in Christ to know truth. He is the Law Giver, He is Wisdom.

1 John 2:26-28 "…26 I have written these things to you about those who are trying to deceive you. 27 And as for you, the anointing you received from Him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But just as His true and genuine anointing teaches you about all things, so remain in Him as you have been taught. 28 And now, little children, remain in Him, so that when He appears, we may be confident and unashamed before Him at His coming.…"

America's Days Are Numbered

America

Isaiah 59:3-4
"Because you have said, “We have made a covenant with death,
And with Sheol we have made a pact.
The overwhelming scourge will not reach us when it passes by,
For we have made falsehood our refuge and we have concealed ourselves with deception.”

The Right Leader Can't Help Us!

Romans 13:1 "1 Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which is from God. The authorities that exist have been appointed by God."

We cannot blame anyone who does not vote, it is possible God told them not to. The nation is wicked, no attempt to get a "righteous" leader will change the hearts of the people. I vote, but I have no hope that God is going to bless the hearts of a nation that kills it's babies at the rate of 4,000 a day.

Even if we managed to get a godly man in the white house, it would not change the hearts of the people of this nation. We are teetering on the brink of total chaos, because the hearts of the people as a whole, are selfish, entitled, arrogant, self righteous and down right rebellious. All of that cannot be changed by a new leader.

God must avenge the murder of 4,000 babies, whose blood cries out from the land. He must spank those adult children who are disrespectful toward parents and authorities. He must discipline those who refuse to listen to truth in terms of Biblical marriage.

We are not going to escape discipline and even wrath of God by getting a better president. Even those who are running or those who have run in the past two decades, have not been godly, they were no different from the stubborn will of the people.

Now that the people have defied God on every level, God will defy their will and will punish us as a nation.

Never mind who votes and who doesn't, never mind who wins or who doesn't. We are under discipline through the consequences of broken families, arrogant adult children and even more so the dishonor of grandchildren.

We are so blind as a people that we don't think anything is wrong. The dishonor and disrespect is seen as normal and acceptable. Babies out of wedlock have been accepted as a ordinary course of events these days. And yet it is an abomination to God.

The description of the evil that is acceptable in this nation is legion! It would take many pages to describe the attitudes and actions of most of the people in this country today.

Stop trusting in a political system to save us, there is no safety any more. The political system has been hijacked by evil men because we are an evil people. It is only Christ Who saves our souls and keeps them until He comes for us.

America, a Nation in Deep Distress

Isaiah 59:1-2
"Behold, the Lord's hand is not so short that it cannot save; nor is His ear so dull that it cannot hear.
But your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, and your sins have hidden His face from you so that He does not hear."

This passage should frighten the United States of America. It is referring to Israel but the principles of how God reacts to a wicked nation who mocks and demeans Him by deliberately rejecting His principles can be applied to any nation.

Turning Aside To Myths

It is difficult now to find a decent true Bible believing church. Even those that claim they are Bible believing are not obeying most of the Word.

2 Timothy 4:2-4 "…2 Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; reprove, rebuke, and encourage with every form of patient instruction. 3 For the time will come when men will not tolerate sound doctrine, but with itching ears they will gather around themselves teachers to suit their own desires. 4 So they will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths.…"