Those who come against God's people are looking at us and hating the One Who dwells in us. They are not seeing us at all, we are an object to them, it is Christ in us that they fight against. Perhaps we see an angry person before us, but that person has been deeply influenced by the whispers of the devil. The person has no rational of his own to hate us, he is simply operating on the emotions and distorted thinking of the devil who has his grip on the helpless person, but not entirely helpless, the devil uses those who love their hatred.
2 Corinthians 4:4 "4 In their case the god of this world (the devil) has blinded the minds of the unbelievers, to keep them from seeing the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God."
Do not take it personally when others mock, demean and attempt to manipulate you, they are doing this to God.
Remember this always, they may mock you, lie against you and leave you without help, but God loves you, knows the truth and will be our help when we need it.
Psalm 46:1 "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."
Philippians 4:13
"I can do all things through him who strengthens me."
God does not say we can do all things with the help of others, He says we can do all things because of His strength in us.
Proverbs 3:5-6
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths."
It is wonderful when we have love and the companionship of others who are walking the same path that we are walking, but when it is not possible, Christ can be everything for us.
It is interesting that the words in 2 Timothy 3, "lack of natural affection", is a condition of the end times mentality, really means a "hard heartedness toward kindred", meaning lack of the natural love between family members. The word is "astorgos", love of family. These people will pretend to be spiritual, but in fact are not at all what they portray. God tells us in verse 5 to avoid them, they can only harm us.
2 Timothy 3:1-5
1 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.
2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
3 WITHOUT NATURAL AFFECTION, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,
4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;
5 Having a FORM OF GODLINESS, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away."
We see this lack of love in families taking many different forms. One of those forms is the women leaving the care of the children in favor of a career, the proliferation of abortion in our day, the lack of kindness and love shown to mothers-in-law or fathers-in-laws, the snarky rebelliousness adult children show aging parents, the waiting for parents to die so the children can have the inheritance and much more.
Many adult children today are angry when their aging parents won't give them the things the parents worked all their lives to earn. The children want those things for free, as though the parents owe it to them.
Demanding that parents do the bidding of their adult children seems to be nearly normal these days. Those parents that do the bidding of their adult children are in bondage to their own children. Perhaps the children were in charge when they were toddlers, the reason they think they should be in charge as they become adults.
The parents who do not do the bidding of their adult children are punished for creating reasonable boundaries that any normal person would erect. If the parents acted toward their children the way the children act toward their parents, the children would become enraged that anything was expected of them, and yet they feel entitled to the parents things.
Notice I said "the parents things", many adult children today do not want their parents, do not love their parents nor have any modicum of concern for them, they just want their money, their help and their protection, without reciprocating. It's not about a relationship with the parents at all. This is how many pretenders treat God, they want all His stuff but want nothing of Him.
Many parents give into their monstrously entitled children out of fear of being alone, especially in their aging years. When we are born again, Christ is our help and our joy, we trust Him more than we depend on our children.
May every aging believer place their trust in Christ in these difficult and loveless times rather than in entitled family members who ought to be given their walking papers.
We should not allow our disrespectful and entitled children to dictate our lives. We did our job as a parent, when they leave the home to be on their own as they should, they are no longer under our care, they need to make their own way the same way we had to. They want their independence, give it to them. Independence means they do not come to you for needs, they work out their own problems and earn their own money. The requirement to make their own way in the world is helpful to them bringing them accomplishment in their own lives. If they are wise they will seek the counsel of the aging parents who have had a proven record of working out problems sensibly.
Helping occasionally when a child is acting responsibly and not demanding it is acceptable. However constantly bailing them out of difficulties they made for themselves by not operating in maturity, is not acceptable. We have no obligation to help them. Any gifts we give to them ought to be our own idea, not capitulating to the demands of a brat who would rather not have to work for what they need.
Note too that most requests by entitled people are not needs but wants. Often they waste their money on foolish unnecessary things while expecting other people to pay their rent, their groceries and other bills.
We are seeing a lot of thirty somethings coming back home to live with Mommy and Daddy because they didn't take care of business. They played, wasted their funds and then come crawling back when the money runs out. If you love your children you will push them out of the nest when they are of age and not bail them out of their troubles. Troubles grow character but only if we work through them wisely.
When a child must make their own way without help they often become more hard working and creative with the money they have. If you love your child you will teach them to make their own way in the world. To operate as though they can't make their own way in the world is a "show of no confidence" in their ability. These aging parents are demonstrating to the child that they are not capable or smart enough to figure things out and be successful.
When the mother bird pushes the fledgling out of the nest, it must fly or fall to the ground, it nearly always flies. The bird that has been extricated from the nest will not return to the mother bird ever again.
In the human experience though, according to God's standard, the children do not come back to live with parents, but the parents go to their children when they are in need of help or cannot operate entirely on their own. The roles are somewhat reversed, the parents are then taken care of by their responsible and loving children as they live out their lives in frailty. This does not remove the command to honor parents, just the opposite. When our parents are aging we ought to show even greater respect, they have enough pain in their lives, they don't need a disrespectful and careless adult child treating them like a child.
Sadly those children who have been indulged by their parents will be living off of their aging parents without being helpful to them. I have heard of many cases like this, in which the aging parent still does all the work and care of their adult children while the children do not help with anything. The aging parent is burdened to the very end of their lives with the care of selfish, mean spirited and entitled adult children who make their lives miserable. Believe me, it is better to be alone in your old age than to be saddled with the whims and tantrums of adult children who care nothing about you.
This sounds very frightening to those who have not seen it, they think its not possible for adult children to act this way, but I have seen it and the misery only ends when the aging parent dies.
What is the moral of this story? Its simple, as aging parents set boundaries for your own home, do not allow adult children to come back and take over the household unless it is to care for you. When elderly parents must live with their children in their children's houses, it would be good to be grateful and unassuming about how things will operate. Making our stay with your adult children an asset to them as much as possible. Even aging parents can do some things that help out around the house, even if the only thing you are capable of is snapping green beans on the porch so that others can be free for the other duties.
When families operate God's way, the presence of adult children with aging parents can be pleasant and endearing, memories that last the rest of the adult children's lives.
Advice I give to children who have troublesome aging parents, is that we never want to be left with guilt over the ill treatment of our parents when they were alive, after they have died. If we have to put up with things from them before they die, it is far better to "suck it up" and remain respectful, than to have to deal with the guilt after they are dead.
Just a thought!
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