When I became born again I lost all my friends. The narcissistic friends who were angry about the new me would inform me they no longer liked me and no one else liked me either.
Narcissists will often attempt to gaslight the believer to cause them to believe they are strange and unlovable to others, with phrases like "so and so doesn't like you either. Or, "you make everyone angry at you."
The narcissist will attempt to influence others to see us as unlovable, they never operate alone in a vacuum, they must have allies.
When I no longer wanted the sin I used to enjoy my friends were angry because they wanted me to do the things they do with them that we used to do together but I no longer wanted for myself.
I didn't tell my friends to stop sinning I just no longer wanted it for my life. With narcissists, it is a personal insult when we leave the lifestyle we had with them to begin to live righteously.
My friends began to accuse me of past forgiven sins as though I was not forgiven and never could be forgiven. Sadly they didn't know what they were saying because if they held my sins against me what does that mean for them who were still remained in their sins that we encouraged in one another?
When we leave behind the old life of sin to follow Christ it is convicting to those who remain in those same sins. They hate that we are enjoying a cleaner life with great hope and new life experiences. Narcissists despise it when they watch us full of joy and resolute in our determination to be a different person.
The narcissist does not know that we did not change ourselves. They do not understand that Christ was the One Who made us into a completely different person who loses the desire to sin.
Over the years those who remain bitter over our changed life will attempt to bring up our past sins again and again to shame us.
A Christian enemy once said to me; "remember how you used to be", in an attempt to shame me to feel superior to me. This person didn't realize they were exposing their own sin of self-righteousness, pretending they never had any sin or that their sin was not as big as mine. This all by itself was sin, their sin of self-righteousness remained while my past sin had been forgiven and forgotten by God many years ago.
The one thing the devil who uses the narcissist wants more than anything else is for the believer to become discouraged, give up and begin in their sin all over again. But we know that when Christ changes us, we have repented and cleansed of sin we will not return to it. We continue in cleansing, God calls it sanctification all the rest of our lives.
1 Thessalonians 5:23
"Now may the God of peace himself sanctify you completely, and may your whole spirit and soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ."
John 17:17
"Sanctify them in the truth; your word is truth."
1 Corinthians 6: 9-9 Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals,
10 nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor those habitually drunk, nor verbal abusers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.
11 Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God."
When we seek Christ, confess our flaws and sins then He will cleanse us.
2 Corinthians 5:17
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come."
1 Peter 1:2
"According to the foreknowledge of God the Father, in the sanctification of the Spirit, for obedience to Jesus Christ and for sprinkling with his blood: May grace and peace be multiplied to you."
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