Our Interpretation Depends on our Attitudes

We all have a tendency to interpret what others say to us based on our history with them as well as our own mindset, and how we tend to think all the time.

If someone is a kind loving person and someone else instructs them or corrects them to help the kind person tends to listen with interest and even take their advice if they agree with what was said. The kind loving person will even be grateful for the input.

If someone is an angry arrogant person on the inside, they will rage at anyone who corrects them, they will see any correction or advice as a personal attack. It's not about what the person said or even how they said it, it's that they said it at all. The reason they see advice as an attack is because if they ever give advice they would be attacking to demean. They think everyone is like them.

When we see someone raging because they have been corrected or disagreed with, this is an angry person on the inside. Those who are not angry don't ever rage, they may strongly disagree but they never attempt to intimidate another human being to make sure they win over them. There remains love in the heart of Christ-followers.

This is what raging is all about, it is an attempt to control another person through intimidation. Narcissists hate when others make their own decisions apart from them.

Because the narcissist is so deeply insecure they cannot abide someone who is strong enough to stand without them or anyone else. They must find a way to break them down and when they cannot break them down they continue their attacks by undermining how others view the target of their hatred. They gossip, lie, and accuse their target of things that never happened and will rage at anyone who will not believe them.

Many of you will recognize these dynamics because you too have been victims of these demonically inspired people. And, the number of these kinds of people is growing every day as we march toward the tribulation.

2 Timothy 3:1-5 "3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult (ragingly insane) times will come.

2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, slanderers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,

3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,

4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,

5 holding to a form of godliness although they have denied its power; avoid such people as these."

One of the things to watch out for is the continual attempt to force you into their mold, through intimidation, mocking, subtle ignoring, excluding, and gossiping with others.

When we see these things happening we can calmly and confidently walk away leaving these people behind in favor of spending time with godly people who will love us His way.

We must be diligent to spend time with those who will be supportive of our desire to walk with Christ. We will grow in holiness if we have godly companions. If we walk with narcissists regularly they will infect our walk, distract us from God and cause continual conflict. This is why God said, "Avoid such people." There is plenty of scripture to support our rejection of those who refuse to love Christ.

2 Corinthians 6:16-18 "…16 What agreement can exist between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will dwell with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be My people.” 17 “Therefore come out from among them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.” 18 And: “I will be a Father to you, and you will be My sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty.”…"

We become just like those whom we admire and spend time with. If we spend our time with those who love Christ and desire to walk with Him, then they will enhance our own walk with Him.

If we spend time with those who are rude, arrogant and self-willed, our walk will be diluted because we will fear the arguments that these god-haters demonstrate all the time. We will continually be dodging the devils arrows distracting us from Christ.

Isaiah 52:11

"Depart, depart, go out from there! Touch no unclean thing; come out from it, purify yourselves, you who carry the vessels of the LORD."

Jeremiah 15:17

"I never sat with the band of revelers, nor did I celebrate with them. Because Your hand was on me, I sat alone, for You have filled me with indignation."

We ought to hate the attitudes and actions of narcsisists to the point of avoiding them. God hates what they do and so should we.

Ezra 6:21

"And the children of Israel, which were come again out of captivity, and all such as had separated themselves unto them from the filthiness of the heathen of the land, to seek the LORD God of Israel, did eat,"

One might say "but aren't we suppose to evangelize people", the answer is yes. However, when we see that someone has rejected Christ and will not listen to us we are to move on, we are not to remain friends with them.

Revelation 18:4

"4 Then I heard another voice from heaven saying,

“Come out of her, my people,

lest you take part in her sins,

lest you share in her plagues;"

If we do not stay away from Christ rejectors we are endorsing their decision to reject Him. God never said to hang out with those who hate Him. We are to give them the gospel and walk away if they will not hear us.

Matthew 10:14 "

"And whoever does not receive you nor listen to your words, as you leave that house or city, shake the dust off your feet."

How To Spot A Collective Narcissistic System

The Simmering Hostility Inside A Narcissist

I have a lot of experience with narcissists since I grew up in a family like this and our entire culture here on the west coast is predisposed to selfishness and rudeness when they don't get what they want.

Narcissists are angry beneath the surface all the time even when they are enjoying themselves, they seem sad all the time loaded for bear at the slightest perceived offense.

They are especially uncomfortable with those who possess the Holy Spirit. They rarely disagree without angst in their voice or questioning to learn more. Since they think they know everything it is offensive for anyone to disagree to think differently from them.

Pentecostal-Charismatic Reject God's Word

"Rejecting Christ's command, the evangelical church now follows Christian psychologists, who have become the new infallible priesthood."

"They have brought into the evangelical church the foolish wisdom of the world with the excuse that "all truth is God's truth.""

The Berean Call

Pentecostal-Charismatic colleges and churches pervert the word of God in favor of feelings and experiences over truth.

I cannot count the number of times I hear these groups quote scriptures out of context or speak their truth that is the opposite of what God said.

"Rather than denying self, "Christian psychology, " thinking it can improve God's infallible and all-sufficient word with the theories of atheistic anti-Christians, coddles rebellious Self with the offer of "self-esteem, self-love, self-acceptance, self-image, self-improvement, self-assertion," and all the other selfisms, ad nauseam. " Quote from the Berean Call

We can see how Pentecostal-Charismatic false doctrine has crept into nearly every gathering even those who think they would not be supportive of these groups.

The way the churches respond to the Word of God and react in relationships shows us their philosophy of life is based on psychology and unbiblical ideas rather than God's Word.

2 Timothy 4:3

"3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears;"

The Certainty of the Second Coming

Walking with Christ will Cost us Friendships

I learned over the years the only way to be able to be bold is to not care if people like us.

 
Galatians 1:10
"For am I now seeking the favor of men, or of God? Or am I striving to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a bond-servant of Christ."

Acts 5:29
"But Peter and the apostles answered, “We must obey God rather than men."
We can be loving and kind and bold, but many people we speak to will hate the boldness and not even see the loving-kindness. They will say we were mean and hateful because we were bold.

 
Ephesians 6:6
"not by way of eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart."

1 Thessalonians 2:4
"but just as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, so we speak, not as pleasing men, but God who examines our hearts.

Luke 16:15
"And He said to them, “You are those who justify yourselves in the sight of men, but God knows your hearts; for that which is highly esteemed among men is detestable in the sight of God."

When we live in a society now that considers it rude to correct or disagree we will be at odds often with those around us. It isn't that we are argumentative it's that the hearers interpret us as fighting because they are fighting. They see every disagreement or correction as a personal attack rather than a way of learning and growing spiritually and emotionally.

 
We encounter far more emotionally immature people now than in past generations.

 
Romans 12:2
"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect."

We grow emotionally and Spiritually mature when we seek God on everything. He promised He would give wisdom liberally to those who ask. He will not bother giving wisdom to those He has already spoken to when they will not obey what He has already given.

 
James 1:5-6
"5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. 6 But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea driven and tossed by the wind."

Born-again believers have no excuse for not knowing what to do or how to think when they have the Holy Spirit, the very nature of Christ living in them. If we do not know how to be or what to do then we are not asking, that's on us.

If we continually worry about what people think or how they will react then we will not only not grow but we will regress to become like them. If you want wisdom and Spiritual maturity then you must give up desiring lots of friends. We will have a small handful and at times none at all, but wisdom from God is far more valuable than the friendship of the world. Hallalujah!

Narcissism vs Godliness

The difference between a narcissistic person and a godly person is that the narcissist does good things to gain credit from others. The approval of others is more important than anything else. Whereas the godly person who does good deeds enjoys doing what is right to please God, this person doesn't care if anyone else sees it or validates the good deeds.

Narcissists need the admiration of others in life, godly people do not need to be admired by others but love to please God. Their internal bent is toward Him rather than self.

Narcissists see correction or disagreement as personal attacks rather than someone attempting to help them understand something or instructing them with principles or actions to gain wisdom or improve a project. These narcissists will give lots of advice to others but will not receive it from others.

A wise godly person invites correction and instruction because they know every discussion can be a learning time for them. They also love sharing what God has already shown them that was effective and works well because it is from God.

Boasting is a big problem with narcissists, they can never let a good deed or accomplishment go without making sure others validate them for it.

I have noticed too that narcissists love to boast of their play activities even thinking they have great value. They must pretend their play is important to keep from sensing they are doing a useless thing.

1 Corinthians 13:11

"11 When I was a child, I used to speak like a child, think like a child, reason like a child; when I became a man, I did away with childish things."

We have all done childish things because we live in a culture that elevates childish behavior as a good thing. Many even say silly things like; "let them be a child."

God's wisdom tells us we are not raising children we are raising adults. In other words, our training as a parent for the child ought to be maturing them into young adults. Everything we do with children ought to be good lessons that inculcate maturity in them.

Children naturally play we don't have to teach them that and we let them do it freely at times, however, telling a parent to train their children to play more is keeping the child a child all his life. I have known many people in our children's generation who spend as much time playing as they do working.

Children can actually be taught to enjoy working as if it were play, then at the end of the day there is something to look back at that was an accomplishment. Learning to enjoy accomplishing something lasting is much more valuable.

Playing is like an addiction, the more someone indulges in it the more they want it. It also creates a dullness in the soul, a sort of intense boredom when one cannot play. Those who are predisposed to boredom are those who have been trained to play. They feel a sense of loss when they are not showing off in some sort of play experience.

Those who are godly may rarely play at a game or an activity but it is rare because they are busy doing what they love that has value.

There is little value in playing, the very reason when we become adults we set it aside to carry on with the real business of life.

We see the work ethic in our culture declining with each new generation as the play mentality increases. The more a culture plays the less they enjoy their work. It is difficult now to find good workers, just ask any employer what he deals with and it isn't pretty.

Promoting play is to promote laziness and disregard for others. We have many complaints about the way this country is going but rarely do we see the play mentality as a big part of it's downfall.

Proverbs 21:17

"He who loves pleasure will become a poor man;

He who loves wine and oil will not become rich."

2 Timothy 3:4

"treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,"

Notice in this last passage pleasure is associated with recklessness.

Titus 3:3

"For we also once were foolish ourselves, disobedient, deceived, enslaved to various lusts and pleasures, spending our life in malice and envy, hateful, hating one another."

Notice in this passage that pleasures are enslavement, like an addiction, and associated with lust, hating, and malice. When we seek our own pleasure regularly we cannot be concerned or have empathy for others.

I have also noticed that those who play a lot almost never help anyone else. They are not seen by the bedside of an ill person to be a companion or to encourage them. These people do not serve others, they only use others as sounding boards for their boasting. When others have a need for love and empathy the narcissist will not be anywhere to be seen. They are bored when someone else has an infirmity or need for companionship.

As I once heard from someone else, I forget who, "narcissists love things and use people", rather than loving people and using things. This is true of their play too, they only show kindness toward those who engage with them in their pleasures. They cannot sit still long enough to hear another person's needs or just sit and be a companion to them.

James 5:5

"You have lived luxuriously on the earth and led a life of wanton pleasure; you have fattened your hearts in a day of slaughter."

Living for self and one's pleasure will one day have its comeuppance. Eventually, all that play will be impossible and the person who loved it will be a shell of a person without wisdom or true companions who could bless them with God's wisdom in their failing years. Because you see, people who play often will not be good companions when the difficulties of old age come upon their friends.

John 15:12-15

Disciples’ Relation to Each Other

12 “This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you.

13 Greater love has no one than this, that a person will lay down his life for his friends.

14 You are My friends if you do what I command you.

15 No longer do I call you slaves, for the slave does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, because all things that I have heard from My Father I have made known to you."

Rarely does someone lose their physical life for another person. This passage shows us that laying down our life has to do with giving up our own happiness or time to be a help to our friends. We can all give up our lives for others while we are still alive. It is true that those who live selfless lives are the most joyful. Those who play have little joy in their hearts and are only happy when they are playing and boasting about it.