There is place for a harsh rebuke for a stubborn believer. I have no problem with calling an attitude what it really is. Harsh rebukes are love, love for the offender and love for those who are watching.
The reason the churches are in the mess they are in is because of the unbiblical definition of modern love. It has more to do with good feelings than it does with caring so deeply that we speak urgency to the hearer to snatch them from the pitfalls of their sin.
When someone is marching toward a cliff, we don't stand there calmly hoping we say it just right so they are not offended, rather we shout out to them, grab their arm and pull them back to save their life.
Those who think harshness is always wrong are those who have been a party to the downfall of this culture and the culture within the church. The time for soft language is over, we are now into the warning stage of love, that is to help others see what destroys them and others to save them all.
Titus 1:12-14 "…12 As one of their own prophets has said, “Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, lazy gluttons.” 13 This testimony is true. Therefore rebuke them sternly, so that they will be sound in the faith, 14 and will pay no attention to Jewish myths or to the commands of men who have rejected the truth.…"
It is not love to ignore sin, nor is it love to soften things so completely that the hearer doesn't see a warning, they go away thinking, "wow that person really likes ME." We do not do favors to anyone by withholding truth to get them to like US!
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