Loving people are always that way to everyone, they don't choose to be nice to some and mean to others, because their love is genuine.
Loving people speak the truth because they are deeply connected to Christ, they love Him above all else and others so much they can't withhold sharing God's truth with them.
The self righteous person hates truth, they prefer a false image of self than facing truth. Those who can face truth about themselves, grow in holiness, it is in the admitting truth about ourselves that helps us become cleansed. Christ will not cleanse someone who has a high opinion of themselves.
Selfish people are more about looking good on the outside, deeply invested in appearing righteous in front of people. The righteous man wants to actually be holy, through continual cleansing of faults and does this by facing truth about themselves and others. The righteous man will choose the ways of God over worldly ways, when no one is watching.
Love is a state of being within a person, it is not a manipulation tactic to gain approval or attention.
1 Corinthians 13:4-8
"4 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, 5 does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, 6 does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; 7 [a]bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never fails; but if there are gifts of [b]prophecy, they will be done away; if there are tongues, they will cease; if there is knowledge, it will be done away."
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