When the Narcissist Accuses You!

When the narcissist accuses you of something you know you did not do, they are really telling on themselves.

I heard a daughter-in-law tell her husband, "your mother hates me." Based on the evidence of the way the daughter-in-law was treating her mother-in-law it was clear that the daughter-in-law was, in reality, saying; "I hate your mother. "

When I was searching the internet for articles about daughters-in-law and mothers-in-law I found hundreds of articles by daughters-in-laws who were railing on their mothers-in-law, proclaiming how much they hated them. I could not possibly read all the articles but their titles alone were appalling.

I saw silly statements like; "my mother-in-law just dropped in without calling" as though something was wrong with this. They even decided to cut off the mother-in-law from the grandchildren because they didn't like something they said.

One daughter-in-law complained that her mother-in-law tried to teach her something, she saw this as offensive and rude.

Then I read one article out of many written by a sweet Christian daughter-in-law who proclaimed loudly how much she loved her mother-in-law. I wanted to cry, what a wonderful loving daughter-in-law who valued the mother of her husband.

We live in an age where in-law spouses are working to destroy the relationships between their spouses and their spouse's parents. When I first began to see this 30 years ago I was astounded at the way many young people were acting, cutting the children and grandchildren off from the spouses. I began to pray for understanding. Then the Lord opened my eyes to what was going on, here was what God told me:

Luke 12:52-53 "…52 From now on, five in one household will be divided, three against two and two against three. 53 They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.” '

Another passage God gave me was even more clear jumping off the page showing me what is going on.

2 Timothy 3:1-5

Difficult (ragingly insane) Times Will Come

3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, slanderers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,

3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,

4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,

5 holding to a form of godliness although they have denied its power; avoid such people as these."

Notice words like; "arrogant, unloving, gossips, brutal and much more. What is the answer for the born-again believer? God does not want us to become like those who have wicked hearts by responding in kind.

We are to remain Christlike no matter what is going on around us or what people are doing to us.

When we stay grounded in the Word of God and prayer we can maintain our pure hearts without being tainted by the world around us.

Proverbs 26:4 "4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly, or you yourself will be like him."

We need not defend ourselves or make sure the foolish person understands, they will not want to understand. The keyword here is "want", even if we were able to explain things clearly the fool will choose not to understand.

Those with wicked hearts never want to hear the truth, they love lies and gossip, this is why God says in verse 5 of second Timothy 3, "get away from such as these."

Be thankful that Christ in us can help us be what we should be no matter what is happening. Keep focused on Him continually.