The narcissist wants you to be angry at and jealous of them. Do not do what they want. Treat them with the respect they didn't give you and avoid them if you can.
Narcissists are never happy, they want us to be in continual conflict through senseless arguments about nothing important.
They will take an innocent good act you do and make it feel and sound foolish. They will take a simple act that is not unkind and make you look as though you did something wrong.
There are little things they do that are designed to cause frustration and anger. Don't allow their antics to cause any emotion or response at all.
One of the devil's most used tactic is to use narcissists to treat people disrespectfully, wait for a frustrated response and then blame the one who responded as the mean or bad person.
Narcissists will never talk something out to fix a relationship problem because they know they caused it and refuse to be accountable for their attitude or actions.
Proverbs 6:12-16 "A worthless person, a wicked man, goes about with crooked speech, winks with his eyes, signals with his feet, points with his finger, with perverted heart devises evil, continually sowing discord; therefore calamity will come upon him suddenly; in a moment he will be broken beyond healing."
Proverbs 13:20 "20 He who walks with the wise will become wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed."
1 Corinthians 15:33
"Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
Proverbs 22:24-25
"Make no friendship with a man given to anger, nor go with a wrathful man, lest you learn his ways and entangle yourself in a snare."
If we do not run from those who have an evil character their ways will rub off on us. There was a time before I was born again when I thought if I did to someone what they did to me it would show them how badly they treated me. This was the opposite of what God says to do.
The devil wants us to use the same tactics on wicked people that they use on us so our witness for Christ will be ruined.
The wicked man only uses the reactions they caused in us to blame us. When we are walking in a Christlike manner we will never do evil or act like the wicked man to teach them something. First they cannot learn from us but we will be able to keep our own character from becoming like them, leaving us innocent and clean.
What the evil man does to us is noticed by God, that's all we need. We do not need to do revenge to get a point across, we can speak the truth, walk uprightly no matter what the evil man is doing and leave all the consequences to God. Our conscience before God is far more important than what anyone else thinks of us or what anyone else has done to us.
Remember God is looking at our character in the face of all that comes against us.
2 Corinthians 6:14
"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"
Proverbs 25:26
"Like a muddied spring or a polluted fountain is a righteous man who gives way before the wicked."
Psalm 1:1
"Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the wicked, nor stands in the way of sinners, nor sits in the seat of scoffers;"
Proverbs 4:14-15 "…13 Hold on to instruction; do not let go. Guard it, for it is your life. 14 Do not set foot on the path of the wicked or walk in the way of evildoers. 15 Avoid it; do not travel on it. Turn from it and pass on by.…"
One time I set a pretty table for my guests who were narcissists. The guests approached the table and in mean voices said; "we are not fancy people you didn't need to do this", I ignored their rudeness and continued to serve the meal. Why would anyone act rudely toward someone for doing a good act? The answer is probably they were jealous, they didn't like me and wanted to make my kind act look foolish or some other selfish thing.
Diminishing someone's good deed to appear superior is a common tactic of the narcissist. They love to demean those they don't like or those of whom they are deeply jealous.
What should be our response to those who act in these mean-spirited ways? It's really very simple, continue following Christ in our love for others no matter how unloving they are to us, and spend far less time with them, they will not stop and eventually, it will wear us down, perhaps even to the point of anger. 2 Timothy 3:5 tells us to avoid them, God said this and we should obey Him.
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