Don't feel a need to explain yourself when you are serving Christ. He is the only One Who directs us in what to do and when to do it. We are not in bondage to the expectations of others.
When we are obeying Christ we are free to ignore the pressure of others to do what they think we should be doing.
Glory to God that He is the One we are answerable to and what a blessing that is!!!
Colossians 3:23-24 "23 Whatever you do, work at it with your whole being, for the Lord and not for men, 24 because you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as your reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.…"
Wednesday, May 10, 2017
Exponential Growth of Narcissism
Has anyone else noticed that this is growing exponentially in this generation, the idea that everyone is special? God teaches that NO ONE is special, only Christ.
I am aghast at how prevalent this is among so many, as though it is the entire culture and they all think it is good and normal.
Personally I believe the increase of this mentality of superiority is associated with the mentality of self esteem that has been taught the past 40 years, actually excessively praising children making them demand special treatment, as apposed to choosing to blend in as we were taught to do as children.
I am 64 years old and blending in "the melting pot" was the overall mentality of our culture which led to respecting one another, accepting our selves even in our flaws, even being able to say we were flawed.
Now days if you tell someone they need work on something in their character they become enraged that you don't think they are perfect and wonderful.
I have actually been told by a couple of family members that they do not respect me. I didn't take it seriously, other than being sad that I could not have a relationship with those who do not respect me.
What I realized was that those who have demeaned me by using the manipulation of lack of respect, in this way, had no respect for anyone but themselves. I was just the one they targeted for verbal abuse because I dared to correct them about something. Instead of dialoguing with me about my concerns they simply raged to shut the discussion down to maintain their status of control.
When we encounter a person who is full of themselves in this narcissistic way, we learn quickly that nothing can be worked out with them, the relationship is based on nothing more than their need to be superior and their enjoyment in demeaning another human being for personal elevation, then we have reached the end of the relationship.
Sadly God warned us about these people and that in the last days it would be mostly our experience. He said it would be as in the days of Lot and Noah, when everyone did what they wanted to do without regard for others, no matter how much they harmed their targets.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 gives us the description of these people while instructing us to turn away from them. They are not to be in our lives if we have a choice because we are called to live in peace and the narcissist will bring nothing but turmoil and hatred to the relationship.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 "3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, 4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
Notice in this Timothy passage that God said they would be "haters of good." The more we walk with Christ and the more we teach His principles the more we will be hated by the narcissist. Not only will they hate us but they will attempt to make us and others think we did something bad, mean or wrong by speaking truth. These types hate the truth, it convicts them of their own sin even when all we do is live our lives to please the Lord.
John 15:17-19 "17 This is My command to you: Love one another. 18 f the world hates you, understand that it hated Me first. 19 If you were of the world, it would love you as its own. Instead, the world hates you, because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world.…"
Knowing these principles and having the wisdom that comes from Christ frees us from the bondage of false guilt. We no longer agonize over how we have been treated because we know where it comes from, the father of lies the devil and we know Who has our back, that being the Lord Jesus Christ, King of kings and Lord of lords.
Hallelujah!!!!
I am aghast at how prevalent this is among so many, as though it is the entire culture and they all think it is good and normal.
Personally I believe the increase of this mentality of superiority is associated with the mentality of self esteem that has been taught the past 40 years, actually excessively praising children making them demand special treatment, as apposed to choosing to blend in as we were taught to do as children.
I am 64 years old and blending in "the melting pot" was the overall mentality of our culture which led to respecting one another, accepting our selves even in our flaws, even being able to say we were flawed.
Now days if you tell someone they need work on something in their character they become enraged that you don't think they are perfect and wonderful.
I have actually been told by a couple of family members that they do not respect me. I didn't take it seriously, other than being sad that I could not have a relationship with those who do not respect me.
What I realized was that those who have demeaned me by using the manipulation of lack of respect, in this way, had no respect for anyone but themselves. I was just the one they targeted for verbal abuse because I dared to correct them about something. Instead of dialoguing with me about my concerns they simply raged to shut the discussion down to maintain their status of control.
When we encounter a person who is full of themselves in this narcissistic way, we learn quickly that nothing can be worked out with them, the relationship is based on nothing more than their need to be superior and their enjoyment in demeaning another human being for personal elevation, then we have reached the end of the relationship.
Sadly God warned us about these people and that in the last days it would be mostly our experience. He said it would be as in the days of Lot and Noah, when everyone did what they wanted to do without regard for others, no matter how much they harmed their targets.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 gives us the description of these people while instructing us to turn away from them. They are not to be in our lives if we have a choice because we are called to live in peace and the narcissist will bring nothing but turmoil and hatred to the relationship.
2 Timothy 3:1-5 "3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come. 2 For men will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, revilers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good, 4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 holding to a form of godliness, although they have denied its power; Avoid such men as these."
Notice in this Timothy passage that God said they would be "haters of good." The more we walk with Christ and the more we teach His principles the more we will be hated by the narcissist. Not only will they hate us but they will attempt to make us and others think we did something bad, mean or wrong by speaking truth. These types hate the truth, it convicts them of their own sin even when all we do is live our lives to please the Lord.
John 15:17-19 "17 This is My command to you: Love one another. 18 f the world hates you, understand that it hated Me first. 19 If you were of the world, it would love you as its own. Instead, the world hates you, because you are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world.…"
Knowing these principles and having the wisdom that comes from Christ frees us from the bondage of false guilt. We no longer agonize over how we have been treated because we know where it comes from, the father of lies the devil and we know Who has our back, that being the Lord Jesus Christ, King of kings and Lord of lords.
Hallelujah!!!!
Tuesday, May 9, 2017
Shame is a Necessary Cleanser
Without shame there is no changing or growing. Those who refuse to admit what they are, will never be anything different from their nasty mean spirited self.
Jeremiah 5:14-15
"…14"They have healed the brokenness of My people superficially, Saying, 'Peace, peace,' But there is no peace. 15"Were they ashamed because of the abomination they have done? They were not even ashamed at all; They did not even know how to blush.Therefore they shall fall among those who fall; At the time that I punish them, They shall be cast down," says the LORD. "
Jeremiah 5:14-15
"…14"They have healed the brokenness of My people superficially, Saying, 'Peace, peace,' But there is no peace. 15"Were they ashamed because of the abomination they have done? They were not even ashamed at all; They did not even know how to blush.Therefore they shall fall among those who fall; At the time that I punish them, They shall be cast down," says the LORD. "
Seek God with all Your Heart
What????
I have actually heard it said, that "we can be too heavenly minded to be any earthly good."
One of the silliest phrases I have heard was this one that has been passed around in the churches for the past 40 years. All it means is that we don't want to be so spiritual that we don't fit in with the world any more. And, why would we want to fit in with the world?
The more heavenly minded we become the more useful to Christ on this earth we can be, that's the truth of it. I see no phrase in the Word of God that we can become "too heavenly minded."
Jeremiah 29:12-13 "…12 'Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart."
1 Chronicles 16:11
"Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!"
When we are seeking Christ in all things, we will be doing the will of God and what could be wrong with that!!!!!!!
I have actually heard it said, that "we can be too heavenly minded to be any earthly good."
One of the silliest phrases I have heard was this one that has been passed around in the churches for the past 40 years. All it means is that we don't want to be so spiritual that we don't fit in with the world any more. And, why would we want to fit in with the world?
The more heavenly minded we become the more useful to Christ on this earth we can be, that's the truth of it. I see no phrase in the Word of God that we can become "too heavenly minded."
Jeremiah 29:12-13 "…12 'Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you. 13 You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart."
1 Chronicles 16:11
"Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!"
When we are seeking Christ in all things, we will be doing the will of God and what could be wrong with that!!!!!!!
The Biggest Flaw and Wart Ever
Those who think they have no flaws and warts, have the biggest flaw and wart of all, that is of intense and growing arrogance.
Written to believers, God said this;
1 John 1:7-9 "…7 But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin. 8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.…"
Written to believers, God said this;
1 John 1:7-9 "…7 But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin. 8 If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.…"
Addiction to Acceptance
"Why do we care about the opinions of others who don't care about us. " Trent Shelton
Believers in Christ, care about everyone and love as Christ loved, but to be deeply invested in whether or not others approve of us will only serve to bring us into bondage to them rather than enjoying freedom in Christ.
John 12:42-43 "42 Nevertheless, many of the leaders believed in Him; but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, for fear that they would be put out of the synagogue. 43 For they loved praise from men more than praise from God. "
Giving up our standards and the personality God gave us to please others is a sort of bondage for us.
When we are sold out to Christ we only have One Who must approve of us, God the Father, and it is on the basis of our decision to trust Jesus Christ. When God has accepted us it is not because we measure up but because we have the ONE inside of us Who does measure up, that is Jesus Christ.
Living a life of continual fear that someone might discover we are not perfect, can be nothing more than a self imposed prison. When we are free in Christ we know we are not perfect, we can openly confess our problems and issues without reservation for the purpose of cleansing. Christ will not cleanse someone who refuses to admit they need it, however when we do confess and are cleansed, all pretense and self exaltation is removed.
If we find ourselves unable to be authentic around someone without punishment for it, then that is the time to consider removing ourselves. Pretense is a cruel task master, it keeps those controlled by it in a continual state of stress, while tearing down those that have been judged by it.
When we are accepted by others with all our warts and flaws, as we accept others with all their warts and flaws, then we can appreciate one another's struggles and blessings! We do not require someone to be our version of perfect to love them, because we love the way Christ loved, "in spite of us."
Black and white thinking, meaning those who can only assess anyone as either all bad or all good, are not judging from the Word of God but from their own humanistic expectations that are not based on truth but their own personal desires. Anyone who thinks like this usually has themselves in the "all good" column. These expectations have to do with whether or not others fawn over them as perfect human beings.
Comparing ourselves one to another is ungodly and arrogant. It is when we compare ourselves to God that leaves every single person who does this, realizing how woefully inadequate they are in terms of their goodness.
Romans 3:9-11 "9 What then? Are we any better? Not at all. For we have already made the charge that Jews and Greeks alike are all under sin. 10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; 11 There is no one who understands; no one who seeks God.…"
When we love someone we will enjoy their accomplishments with them and correct them where necessary. But we will never use covert and mean spirited manipulation to hurt them or beat them into submission.
Romans 12:14-16 "14 Bless those who persecute you. Bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but enjoy the company of the lowly. Do not be conceited.…"
I have encountered people over the years who could not bring themselves to laugh at a joke told by the person for which they have contempt. They withheld laughter and joy in order to diminish the laughter and joy of the one they hate.
I have also witnessed those who could not compliment or engage in joy with another person when they were jealous of that person. When someone withholds in the form of refusing to share in the joy and heartache of another, they are most likely someone who cannot validate another person who does not elevate them. Their aim is to devalue the person by minimizing their experiences in life, perhaps even judging them as silly and meaningless, while at the same time expecting others to engage with them in all their own emotions.
Sneaky mean tactics are of the devil, they do not belong in the lives of the born again believer. Judging others without speaking to them is also of the devil. The devil loves to keep people from working things out or hearing their need for instruction to change, he wants the trials of human relationships to continue, increasing in intensity and frequency.
1 Peter 5:7-9 "…7 Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. 8 Be sober-minded and alert. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in your faith and in the knowledge that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of suffering.…"
It is impossible to maintain a relationship with those who cause others pain and refuse to hear a correction. It is correction, confession and forgiveness that restores broken relationships, all three elements are needed. As long as there is someone who will not listen, be honest and authentic, even continuing their role as trouble maker, there can be no reconciliation.
The same is true in coming to Christ. Our relationship with human beings are a microcosm of the relationship of Christ to His church and each born again believer. If we cannot do what we should with Christ, we will not do as we should with our fellow human beings and vise versa.
How we feel about God is reflected in our attitude about others. If we demonstrate superiority toward man we will think we are above God too.
Proverbs 11:2
"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom."
Proverbs 29:23
"One's pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor."
James 4:6
"But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”"
Believers in Christ, care about everyone and love as Christ loved, but to be deeply invested in whether or not others approve of us will only serve to bring us into bondage to them rather than enjoying freedom in Christ.
John 12:42-43 "42 Nevertheless, many of the leaders believed in Him; but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, for fear that they would be put out of the synagogue. 43 For they loved praise from men more than praise from God. "
Giving up our standards and the personality God gave us to please others is a sort of bondage for us.
When we are sold out to Christ we only have One Who must approve of us, God the Father, and it is on the basis of our decision to trust Jesus Christ. When God has accepted us it is not because we measure up but because we have the ONE inside of us Who does measure up, that is Jesus Christ.
Living a life of continual fear that someone might discover we are not perfect, can be nothing more than a self imposed prison. When we are free in Christ we know we are not perfect, we can openly confess our problems and issues without reservation for the purpose of cleansing. Christ will not cleanse someone who refuses to admit they need it, however when we do confess and are cleansed, all pretense and self exaltation is removed.
If we find ourselves unable to be authentic around someone without punishment for it, then that is the time to consider removing ourselves. Pretense is a cruel task master, it keeps those controlled by it in a continual state of stress, while tearing down those that have been judged by it.
When we are accepted by others with all our warts and flaws, as we accept others with all their warts and flaws, then we can appreciate one another's struggles and blessings! We do not require someone to be our version of perfect to love them, because we love the way Christ loved, "in spite of us."
Black and white thinking, meaning those who can only assess anyone as either all bad or all good, are not judging from the Word of God but from their own humanistic expectations that are not based on truth but their own personal desires. Anyone who thinks like this usually has themselves in the "all good" column. These expectations have to do with whether or not others fawn over them as perfect human beings.
Comparing ourselves one to another is ungodly and arrogant. It is when we compare ourselves to God that leaves every single person who does this, realizing how woefully inadequate they are in terms of their goodness.
Romans 3:9-11 "9 What then? Are we any better? Not at all. For we have already made the charge that Jews and Greeks alike are all under sin. 10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; 11 There is no one who understands; no one who seeks God.…"
When we love someone we will enjoy their accomplishments with them and correct them where necessary. But we will never use covert and mean spirited manipulation to hurt them or beat them into submission.
Romans 12:14-16 "14 Bless those who persecute you. Bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but enjoy the company of the lowly. Do not be conceited.…"
I have encountered people over the years who could not bring themselves to laugh at a joke told by the person for which they have contempt. They withheld laughter and joy in order to diminish the laughter and joy of the one they hate.
I have also witnessed those who could not compliment or engage in joy with another person when they were jealous of that person. When someone withholds in the form of refusing to share in the joy and heartache of another, they are most likely someone who cannot validate another person who does not elevate them. Their aim is to devalue the person by minimizing their experiences in life, perhaps even judging them as silly and meaningless, while at the same time expecting others to engage with them in all their own emotions.
Sneaky mean tactics are of the devil, they do not belong in the lives of the born again believer. Judging others without speaking to them is also of the devil. The devil loves to keep people from working things out or hearing their need for instruction to change, he wants the trials of human relationships to continue, increasing in intensity and frequency.
1 Peter 5:7-9 "…7 Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. 8 Be sober-minded and alert. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in your faith and in the knowledge that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kinds of suffering.…"
It is impossible to maintain a relationship with those who cause others pain and refuse to hear a correction. It is correction, confession and forgiveness that restores broken relationships, all three elements are needed. As long as there is someone who will not listen, be honest and authentic, even continuing their role as trouble maker, there can be no reconciliation.
The same is true in coming to Christ. Our relationship with human beings are a microcosm of the relationship of Christ to His church and each born again believer. If we cannot do what we should with Christ, we will not do as we should with our fellow human beings and vise versa.
How we feel about God is reflected in our attitude about others. If we demonstrate superiority toward man we will think we are above God too.
Proverbs 11:2
"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom."
Proverbs 29:23
"One's pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor."
James 4:6
"But he gives more grace. Therefore it says, “God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”"
All About Christ
We are not good in and of ourselves, it is only Christ Who is good in us. When we remember this, there is no room for arrogance or an attitude of superiority.
Romans 3:9-11 "9 What then? Are we any better? Not at all. For we have already made the charge that Jews and Greeks alike are all under sin. 10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; 11 There is no one who understands; no one who seeks God.…"
In a God honoring gathering, no one is treated as special or above another. All people in the gathering are loved, all have need for correction and all need to hear truth.
When we run into arrogance or self promotion we are dealing with one who has forgotten from where they came and what they would still be if not for Christ in them. It is not about them at all, it's about Christ, ALL about Christ.
Romans 3:9-11 "9 What then? Are we any better? Not at all. For we have already made the charge that Jews and Greeks alike are all under sin. 10 As it is written: “There is no one righteous, not even one; 11 There is no one who understands; no one who seeks God.…"
In a God honoring gathering, no one is treated as special or above another. All people in the gathering are loved, all have need for correction and all need to hear truth.
When we run into arrogance or self promotion we are dealing with one who has forgotten from where they came and what they would still be if not for Christ in them. It is not about them at all, it's about Christ, ALL about Christ.
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