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Monday, March 5, 2018
A Challenge to the Narcissist Is Like Death
Narcissists believe that any correction or a rebuke, is a rejection of their entire being, character assassination as they see it. This is why they act so violently toward anyone who will dare to challenge them, no matter how mild a challenge it might be.
Narcissists Have Little Substance
Interesting that narcissists always attack the character of the one that tells the truth, rather than logically and rationally addressing the subject matter.
Proverbs 29:10-12 "…10 Men of bloodshed hate the blameless, But the upright are concerned for his life. 11 A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back. 12 If a ruler pays attention to falsehood, All his ministers become wicked.…"
Proverbs 29:10-12 "…10 Men of bloodshed hate the blameless, But the upright are concerned for his life. 11 A fool always loses his temper, But a wise man holds it back. 12 If a ruler pays attention to falsehood, All his ministers become wicked.…"
The Tactics of the Narcissist
Narcissists are about forcing others to listen to them but they refuse to listen to others.
They demand that we comply with their thinking but will not consider our opinions.
These people call others "judgmental" but in fact they are the ones who continually judge even the smallest and even unimportant things.
These people are not looking to understand others, but are angry if others don't go along with their ideas.
In short, narcissists are hypocrites. They will call you materialistic when you have less than they do.
We are seeing an increase in these narcissistic mentalities, so much so that everyone who loves the Lord will be targets for these people. The purpose of the narcissist is to devalue us in the eyes of others so that others will not like us.
There is nothing more frustrating to the narcissist than those who are confident in what they believe and are steadfast.
Narcissists do not care about truth, they only care about appearing to care about truth.
Narcissists work at engineering trouble where there need not be any problems. If all eyes and ears are on them while they are able to bring down the confidence of those they target, they count this as a win.
Family gatherings with these people are agonizing, since the gathering for them is not about connecting with people they love, the gatherings are opportunities to keep everyone riveted to their greatness.
The narcissist does not regret what they do, the derive a sense of superiority from upsetting their target and keeping everyone in the room focused on themselves.
If you do a good thing that might bring compliments from others, the narcissist must demean it in some way to take any attention or validation away from their target.
The narcissist gains pleasure out of producing chaos, their goal is to dominate through intimidation. Reasonable people back down when they see a fight about to ensue. This makes the narcissist feel they are winning and they have managed to make a fool out of anyone who responds to them, in defensiveness or attempting to explain their side.
NO matter how good the targets argument, the narcissist will push and push until the target gets angry and then say, "see how you are, you are out of control."
This is why it is best to walk away when we spot these people before they have a chance to start something ugly.
Proverbs 26:4-14
"4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
Lest you also be like him.
5 Answer a fool according to his folly,
Lest he be wise in his own eyes.
6 He who sends a message by the hand of a fool
Cuts off his own feet and drinks violence.
7 Like the legs of the lame that hang limp
Is a proverb in the mouth of fools.
8 Like one who binds a stone in a sling
Is he who gives honor to a fool.
9 Like a thorn that goes into the hand of a drunkard
Is a proverb in the mouth of fools.
10 The great God who formed everything
Gives the fool his hire and the transgressor his wages.[a]
11 As a dog returns to his own vomit,
So a fool repeats his folly.
12 Do you see a man wise in his own eyes?
There is more hope for a fool than for him."
Another manipulation tactic of the narcissist is to ignore you completely, they will resist any thought of validating you through compliments or enjoyment of your accomplishments. Withholding love is paramount to keeping you in a one down position.
Encouragement is not on the lips of the narcissists unless you are someone they wish to impress and use later. You will never hear words of support from these people, even when what you are doing is good.
The narcissist will focus on the person they think is a weak person to target. If you have been seen as the weak person because you are kind and empathetic, the narcissist will go after you for defeat. They are enemies of goodness, kindness and validation. They cannot feel superior unless they are elevated and you are diminished.
We begin to see the truth when we have been obeying God and we cannot figure out why someone is raging at us for things godly people would be pleased with, then the light bulb goes on and we realize this isn't really about us, it's the problem that is in the minds of the narcissist.
We see this same mentality in people like Adolph Hitler, he was not satisfied with being leader of a country, he wanted to be leader of the world. His prejudice against the Jews was based on their own prosperity. They were not bothering him, they were an asset to the country they lived in, prospering and growing, family oriented and serving their God. God used this evil of Hitler to eventually bring back the nation of Israel. They still need to find Christ, however, God is still blessing them to bring them to the knowledge of Christ.
Narcissists hate God they hate those who are resolute in following Him. They hate the goodness of their targets. You will not see them targeting those who are not born again or who are not as "good as they see themselves", the love to surround themselves with "lessers" in order to feel superior. If you are one they perceive as one who is not lesser, they will work to make you see yourself that way to gain power over you.
It is a waste of time and energy to express your thoughts and feelings to these people, they will use any and everything you share against you, even lying about what you said and did to turn others against you.
It is best to stay out of the lives of the narcissist, if we have to be around them for a short time it is best to remain aloof and even remove ourselves when we can. Just pray for them and move on! Place no value on their tactics or their words, they are deliberately doing this for their own perverted desires.
They demand that we comply with their thinking but will not consider our opinions.
These people call others "judgmental" but in fact they are the ones who continually judge even the smallest and even unimportant things.
These people are not looking to understand others, but are angry if others don't go along with their ideas.
In short, narcissists are hypocrites. They will call you materialistic when you have less than they do.
We are seeing an increase in these narcissistic mentalities, so much so that everyone who loves the Lord will be targets for these people. The purpose of the narcissist is to devalue us in the eyes of others so that others will not like us.
There is nothing more frustrating to the narcissist than those who are confident in what they believe and are steadfast.
Narcissists do not care about truth, they only care about appearing to care about truth.
Narcissists work at engineering trouble where there need not be any problems. If all eyes and ears are on them while they are able to bring down the confidence of those they target, they count this as a win.
Family gatherings with these people are agonizing, since the gathering for them is not about connecting with people they love, the gatherings are opportunities to keep everyone riveted to their greatness.
The narcissist does not regret what they do, the derive a sense of superiority from upsetting their target and keeping everyone in the room focused on themselves.
If you do a good thing that might bring compliments from others, the narcissist must demean it in some way to take any attention or validation away from their target.
The narcissist gains pleasure out of producing chaos, their goal is to dominate through intimidation. Reasonable people back down when they see a fight about to ensue. This makes the narcissist feel they are winning and they have managed to make a fool out of anyone who responds to them, in defensiveness or attempting to explain their side.
NO matter how good the targets argument, the narcissist will push and push until the target gets angry and then say, "see how you are, you are out of control."
This is why it is best to walk away when we spot these people before they have a chance to start something ugly.
Proverbs 26:4-14
"4 Do not answer a fool according to his folly,
Lest you also be like him.
5 Answer a fool according to his folly,
Lest he be wise in his own eyes.
6 He who sends a message by the hand of a fool
Cuts off his own feet and drinks violence.
7 Like the legs of the lame that hang limp
Is a proverb in the mouth of fools.
8 Like one who binds a stone in a sling
Is he who gives honor to a fool.
9 Like a thorn that goes into the hand of a drunkard
Is a proverb in the mouth of fools.
10 The great God who formed everything
Gives the fool his hire and the transgressor his wages.[a]
11 As a dog returns to his own vomit,
So a fool repeats his folly.
12 Do you see a man wise in his own eyes?
There is more hope for a fool than for him."
Another manipulation tactic of the narcissist is to ignore you completely, they will resist any thought of validating you through compliments or enjoyment of your accomplishments. Withholding love is paramount to keeping you in a one down position.
Encouragement is not on the lips of the narcissists unless you are someone they wish to impress and use later. You will never hear words of support from these people, even when what you are doing is good.
The narcissist will focus on the person they think is a weak person to target. If you have been seen as the weak person because you are kind and empathetic, the narcissist will go after you for defeat. They are enemies of goodness, kindness and validation. They cannot feel superior unless they are elevated and you are diminished.
We begin to see the truth when we have been obeying God and we cannot figure out why someone is raging at us for things godly people would be pleased with, then the light bulb goes on and we realize this isn't really about us, it's the problem that is in the minds of the narcissist.
We see this same mentality in people like Adolph Hitler, he was not satisfied with being leader of a country, he wanted to be leader of the world. His prejudice against the Jews was based on their own prosperity. They were not bothering him, they were an asset to the country they lived in, prospering and growing, family oriented and serving their God. God used this evil of Hitler to eventually bring back the nation of Israel. They still need to find Christ, however, God is still blessing them to bring them to the knowledge of Christ.
Narcissists hate God they hate those who are resolute in following Him. They hate the goodness of their targets. You will not see them targeting those who are not born again or who are not as "good as they see themselves", the love to surround themselves with "lessers" in order to feel superior. If you are one they perceive as one who is not lesser, they will work to make you see yourself that way to gain power over you.
It is a waste of time and energy to express your thoughts and feelings to these people, they will use any and everything you share against you, even lying about what you said and did to turn others against you.
It is best to stay out of the lives of the narcissist, if we have to be around them for a short time it is best to remain aloof and even remove ourselves when we can. Just pray for them and move on! Place no value on their tactics or their words, they are deliberately doing this for their own perverted desires.
What is Your Witness?
Have you ever had the thought as I have, that if I had believed that Christianity was anything like those Christians I knew in my unsaved years, I would never have become a Christian?
Sad but true!
Sad but true!
Living in a Fantasy World
We live in a world filled with fantasy and a people who will only tolerate their own ideas.
Those who are truth tellers will be shunned and mocked by many around them. Since the world doesn't want truth, only "happiness", there is a tendency to feel agitated when someone speaks boldly with authority.
We are encountering more people who have a tendency to rage when told they are wrong about something, because they will only tolerate an "opinion." When we say "God says this" or "no you are wrong because of this", the hearers become incensed that we dare to speak without doubt.
Many people want everyone to have a measure of doubt in their belief system. When we speak with a measure of doubt about out own beliefs then the hearer feels justified in believing their error. Personal validation is more important to the people than truth or evidence. Being validated in our beliefs is more important to our world than knowing truth.
Truth tellers will be mocked, excluded and demeaned whenever they speak with authority from the Bible. The truth is a threat to those who are unsure of their own reality.
So maybe we could say that we live in a world that fears truth rather than values it.
If you see things in truth and declare that truth, then you are a threat to the culture as a whole and will frighten people. Yes, I said that, the most frightening people to our culture are those who see truth and declare it.
Since truth is not very important in our culture we can conclude that neither is integrity. How can we even know what integrity is if there is no absolute truth. How can we know what honesty looks like when there is no absolute truth.
I have been noticing that even the idea of honesty is skewed in a world that values fantasy above truth. As long as you say you are being honest, there is no need to evaluate if we really are walking in honesty. As long as someone says they are sincere, they think this validates their assertions.
One person will say "I have been honest", when in fact they embellished the truth, left half of it out or changed it a little to fit their desired outcome. And, yet they will say they have been honest. We live in a world full of half truth and lies while calling it all "honesty." The interpretation is that honesty is based on how we "feel" rather than reality. If we "feel" something is honest then it must be so.
Our culture runs on feelings more than it seeks facts. When feelings are the focus then facts can be manipulated to fit the desired feelings.
Feelings are facts to those who are not very interested in truth. This is the reason the Bible is offensive to most people we meet.
We are living in an irrational world filled with people who love their elevated status of godhood based on their fantasies. Let me ask this culture, "how is that self esteem teaching working out for you"? I can tell you that it is not working, but because so many people like how it feels, they would say it is working.
We have more teen suicides than ever before, there are school shootings that never happened when I was a teen. The worst thing that happened when I was in school was those who smoked or chewed gum in class. Now we have school shootings, irrational and out of control young people who feel so entitled that they have no conscience about murdering someone just because they have been bullied, as though shooting others is not bullying.
Adult children are more disrespectful than ever before and yet they think they are respectful. I guess they think that if they don't kill their parents then they are respectful. Mocking, dismissing and demeaning parents is disrespectful, but since this culture see it as normal, then they are counted as respectful for not killing their parents. But wait a minute, doesn't God say if you have hatred, contempt, in your heart for someone that is the same as if you had murdered them? Yep, many adult children treat their parents with a great deal of contempt.
We have based so much on "feelings" that we have managed to give excuses to people for their bad behavior, calling it "an addiction", instead of calling it what it really is, and that is sin.
When the culture lives in a fantasy world of make believe there is no longer accountability for evil behavior, only excuses that have few if any consequences.
Young people are out of control because their parents are indulging themselves in divorce and remarriage, even their parents cannot learn how to get along in a marriage, while demonstrating to their children how to act when things get rough, and that is to throw away or mock and intimidate the people who are bothersome.
Is anyone still scratching their head about what has happened to America? I'm not, it is clear that sin in the lives of the parents who are selfish is causing this mess, and, some grandparents are culpable too for coddling the bad decisions of their adult children.
When an entire culture lives in fantasy every day, they will interpret everything in terms of their momentary feelings rather than truth and we will end up with what we have right now, the 2 Timothy 3 problem of self love.
That's the truth, there is only one fix for the mess we find ourselves in, that is to tell the truth and take our lumps, perhaps someone will listen, see their need for Christ to be changed by Him and that person will see victory over sin and lies in their own live.
I do not see the entire culture changing, only individuals as we plod along obeying the Lord, telling the truth and remaining faithful to Christ as we go.
Brothers and sisters we are going home soon, our job of truth telling is not over until the Lord comes for us. May we be encouraged to "keep on keeping on" in our walk with Christ, even if we find no one to listen.
The anti-christ will exalt himself above Christ, his minions are in the world today working on the minds of the culture to exalt themselves above God. their rebellion against truth is evidence of this. The world is ready to receive someone who tells them exactly what they want to hear, the very tactic of the devil in these last days. The world is believing so many lies right now that the really big lie of the anti-christ will be easily and readily received when he reveals himself.
Truth is truth even if no one believes it.
2 Thessalonians 2
"1 Now we request you, brethren, with regard to the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and our gathering together to Him,
2 that you not be quickly shaken from your composure or be disturbed either by a spirit or a message or a letter as if from us, to the effect that the day of the Lord has come.
3 Let no one in any way deceive you, for it will not come unless the apostasy comes first, and the man of lawlessness is revealed, the son of destruction,
4 who opposes and exalts himself above every so-called god or object of worship, so that he takes his seat in the temple of God, displaying himself as being God.
5 Do you not remember that while I was still with you, I was telling you these things?
6 And you know what restrains him now, so that in his time he will be revealed.
7 For the mystery of lawlessness is already at work; only he who now restrains will do so until he is taken out of the way.
8 Then that lawless one will be revealed whom the Lord will slay with the breath of His mouth and bring to an end by the appearance of His coming;
9 that is, the one whose coming is in accord with the activity of Satan, with all power and signs and false wonders,
10 and with all the deception of wickedness for those who perish, because they did not receive the love of the truth so as to be saved.
11 For this reason God will send upon them a deluding influence so that they will believe what is false,
12 in order that they all may be judged who did not believe the truth, but [n]took pleasure in wickedness.
13 But we should always give thanks to God for you, brethren beloved by the Lord, because God has chosen you from the beginning for salvation through sanctification by the Spirit and faith in the truth.
14 It was for this He called you through our gospel, that you may gain the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ.
15 So then, brethren, stand firm and hold to the traditions which you were taught, whether by word of mouth or by letter from us.
16 Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who has loved us and given us eternal comfort and good hope by grace,
17 comfort and strengthen your hearts in every good work and word."
We can be thankful to the Lord that we have one another to encourage and build up in the faith in these very trying times. Our joy remains full even with the chaos around us, because we have the Creator of the Universe living inside of us. Hallelujah!
Those who are truth tellers will be shunned and mocked by many around them. Since the world doesn't want truth, only "happiness", there is a tendency to feel agitated when someone speaks boldly with authority.
We are encountering more people who have a tendency to rage when told they are wrong about something, because they will only tolerate an "opinion." When we say "God says this" or "no you are wrong because of this", the hearers become incensed that we dare to speak without doubt.
Many people want everyone to have a measure of doubt in their belief system. When we speak with a measure of doubt about out own beliefs then the hearer feels justified in believing their error. Personal validation is more important to the people than truth or evidence. Being validated in our beliefs is more important to our world than knowing truth.
Truth tellers will be mocked, excluded and demeaned whenever they speak with authority from the Bible. The truth is a threat to those who are unsure of their own reality.
So maybe we could say that we live in a world that fears truth rather than values it.
If you see things in truth and declare that truth, then you are a threat to the culture as a whole and will frighten people. Yes, I said that, the most frightening people to our culture are those who see truth and declare it.
Since truth is not very important in our culture we can conclude that neither is integrity. How can we even know what integrity is if there is no absolute truth. How can we know what honesty looks like when there is no absolute truth.
I have been noticing that even the idea of honesty is skewed in a world that values fantasy above truth. As long as you say you are being honest, there is no need to evaluate if we really are walking in honesty. As long as someone says they are sincere, they think this validates their assertions.
One person will say "I have been honest", when in fact they embellished the truth, left half of it out or changed it a little to fit their desired outcome. And, yet they will say they have been honest. We live in a world full of half truth and lies while calling it all "honesty." The interpretation is that honesty is based on how we "feel" rather than reality. If we "feel" something is honest then it must be so.
Our culture runs on feelings more than it seeks facts. When feelings are the focus then facts can be manipulated to fit the desired feelings.
Feelings are facts to those who are not very interested in truth. This is the reason the Bible is offensive to most people we meet.
We are living in an irrational world filled with people who love their elevated status of godhood based on their fantasies. Let me ask this culture, "how is that self esteem teaching working out for you"? I can tell you that it is not working, but because so many people like how it feels, they would say it is working.
We have more teen suicides than ever before, there are school shootings that never happened when I was a teen. The worst thing that happened when I was in school was those who smoked or chewed gum in class. Now we have school shootings, irrational and out of control young people who feel so entitled that they have no conscience about murdering someone just because they have been bullied, as though shooting others is not bullying.
Adult children are more disrespectful than ever before and yet they think they are respectful. I guess they think that if they don't kill their parents then they are respectful. Mocking, dismissing and demeaning parents is disrespectful, but since this culture see it as normal, then they are counted as respectful for not killing their parents. But wait a minute, doesn't God say if you have hatred, contempt, in your heart for someone that is the same as if you had murdered them? Yep, many adult children treat their parents with a great deal of contempt.
We have based so much on "feelings" that we have managed to give excuses to people for their bad behavior, calling it "an addiction", instead of calling it what it really is, and that is sin.
When the culture lives in a fantasy world of make believe there is no longer accountability for evil behavior, only excuses that have few if any consequences.
Young people are out of control because their parents are indulging themselves in divorce and remarriage, even their parents cannot learn how to get along in a marriage, while demonstrating to their children how to act when things get rough, and that is to throw away or mock and intimidate the people who are bothersome.
Is anyone still scratching their head about what has happened to America? I'm not, it is clear that sin in the lives of the parents who are selfish is causing this mess, and, some grandparents are culpable too for coddling the bad decisions of their adult children.
When an entire culture lives in fantasy every day, they will interpret everything in terms of their momentary feelings rather than truth and we will end up with what we have right now, the 2 Timothy 3 problem of self love.
That's the truth, there is only one fix for the mess we find ourselves in, that is to tell the truth and take our lumps, perhaps someone will listen, see their need for Christ to be changed by Him and that person will see victory over sin and lies in their own live.
I do not see the entire culture changing, only individuals as we plod along obeying the Lord, telling the truth and remaining faithful to Christ as we go.
Brothers and sisters we are going home soon, our job of truth telling is not over until the Lord comes for us. May we be encouraged to "keep on keeping on" in our walk with Christ, even if we find no one to listen.
The anti-christ will exalt himself above Christ, his minions are in the world today working on the minds of the culture to exalt themselves above God. their rebellion against truth is evidence of this. The world is ready to receive someone who tells them exactly what they want to hear, the very tactic of the devil in these last days. The world is believing so many lies right now that the really big lie of the anti-christ will be easily and readily received when he reveals himself.
Truth is truth even if no one believes it.
2 Thessalonians 2
"1 Now we request you, brethren, with regard to the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and our gathering together to Him,
2 that you not be quickly shaken from your composure or be disturbed either by a spirit or a message or a letter as if from us, to the effect that the day of the Lord has come.
3 Let no one in any way deceive you, for it will not come unless the apostasy comes first, and the man of lawlessness is revealed, the son of destruction,
4 who opposes and exalts himself above every so-called god or object of worship, so that he takes his seat in the temple of God, displaying himself as being God.
5 Do you not remember that while I was still with you, I was telling you these things?
6 And you know what restrains him now, so that in his time he will be revealed.
7 For the mystery of lawlessness is already at work; only he who now restrains will do so until he is taken out of the way.
8 Then that lawless one will be revealed whom the Lord will slay with the breath of His mouth and bring to an end by the appearance of His coming;
9 that is, the one whose coming is in accord with the activity of Satan, with all power and signs and false wonders,
10 and with all the deception of wickedness for those who perish, because they did not receive the love of the truth so as to be saved.
11 For this reason God will send upon them a deluding influence so that they will believe what is false,
12 in order that they all may be judged who did not believe the truth, but [n]took pleasure in wickedness.
13 But we should always give thanks to God for you, brethren beloved by the Lord, because God has chosen you from the beginning for salvation through sanctification by the Spirit and faith in the truth.
14 It was for this He called you through our gospel, that you may gain the glory of our Lord Jesus Christ.
15 So then, brethren, stand firm and hold to the traditions which you were taught, whether by word of mouth or by letter from us.
16 Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself and God our Father, who has loved us and given us eternal comfort and good hope by grace,
17 comfort and strengthen your hearts in every good work and word."
We can be thankful to the Lord that we have one another to encourage and build up in the faith in these very trying times. Our joy remains full even with the chaos around us, because we have the Creator of the Universe living inside of us. Hallelujah!
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