Narcissistic Projection

The narcissists projection and accusations are actually their confessions about themselves.

Those who are mature are able to be honest with themselves and others. The narcissists accuses others of what he is doing and the others are not, to be able to blame others for the narcissists sinful attitude and behavior.

Narcissists think in black and white, you are either all good or all bad, in their mind they only love those who they perceive to be all good and are mean, mocking and dismissive of those they perceive to be all bad.

For the narcissist the all bad person can do no right ever, they are continually criticized for everything no matter how good it is.

For the narcissist the all good person is seen as godlike, anyone who points out a flaw, no matter how minor, will be the target for "attacking" their god.

No one is all good or all bad, everyone has flaws, even the narcissist who thinks they have no flaws.

Narcissists will only associate with those they perceive to be all good, identifying themselves with these people. Sadly when the god like person shows a flaw the narcissist will either deny they saw the flaw or they will discard their god for not being perfect. I have seen both these things in my journey.

Since believers know that everyone not only has flaws but are not worthy of love because of our sinful nature, we don't place anyone in a god-like status. No one fits the bill of perfection, therefore we are free to be friends with and love flawed people. Since we can admit that we have warts like everyone else, we never feel the need to be superior to others.

Those who feel superior are not capable of loving anyone, they must only associate with those that elevate themselves as "special" and "perfect."

The worst thing we can do for our children is to praise them continually, this builds within them the expectation of being treated as better than others.

Romans 3:22-24 "…22 And this righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no distinction, 23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus.…"

We see what happens when a culture praises children excessively, the children become entitled monsters without empathy and love for anyone but themselves.

Philippians 2:2-4 "…2 then make my joy complete by being of one mind, having the same love, being united in spirit and purpose. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or empty pride, but in humility consider others more important than yourselves. 4 Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."

The bottom line: those who are narcissists need to ponder God instead of themselves. There is a spectrum of narcissism, everyone has some elements of this but there are those who operate daily in this vein and bring ruination to relationships. It is good for us to ask God if we have any elements of this nasty trait and petition Him to cleanse us from it.