Disordered Thinking of the Narcissist

Disordered thinking of the narcissist may include evaluations based on desired beliefs rather than truth.

If a narcissist treats someone with contempt because they don't like what you believe, they will consider it wise and with good reason. The narcissist counts themselves as attempting to show you right from wrong by intimidating and coercing you into submission to them.

However if we disagree with the narcissist they consider it contempt and a personal attack. We are a "bad person" for daring to have our own views.

The rational person who is trying to help shares their views out of concern and love. We do not attack the character of the person we correct, we simply share to help.

The narcissist demands, coerces and demeans to show the one who disagrees with them that they are inferior in character.

In one case the rational kind person wants to help, in the case of the narcissist he/she only wants to control you choosing to believe you are of questionable character for not agreeing with them.

This is why the narcissist comes unglued when corrected, they believe you are acting the way they act. They believe you are attacking because if they were correcting you they would be placing your character into serious question. The narcissist is attacking but the loving person is sharing to help.

Proverbs 12:14-16 …14 By fruitful speech a man will be filled with good things, and the work of a man’s hands will reward him. 15 The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to counsel. 16 A fool’s anger is known at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult.…"

Proverbs 15:18
"18 A hot-tempered man stirs up strife,
But the slow to anger calms a dispute."

Proverbs 10:23 "23 A fool finds pleasure in wicked schemes, but a person of understanding delights in wisdom."

The narcissist is a fool, he searches for reasons to be angry with people when there is no reason. This kind of fool listens to no one, he never grows past infancy in his responses to challenges. Every thing he does is based on having his own way while expecting everyone else to bow to him. This narcissist bends to no one but demands that everyone bend to him.

We cannot help these kind of people since everything they say and do is based on elevating themselves they will not hear criticism that might help them grow a little more.

In our modern culture criticism is considered mean or rude. However in times past this word was considered a good word. Criticism was used to help one learn a better way. It was helpful and good to listen to criticism.

Criticism in the old way of thinking was the analyzing of a situation to correct errors or redirect a path that could be better. So many words like this have changed over the years to become known as bad things, but in fact in a culture of the past they were words that helped one grow in knowledge and wisdom.

Since evaluating anything has become forbidden in our culture we are seeing people who are middle age who have no more wisdom than they did when they were young. Sadly those who do not grow regress. When we are not moving forward we are moving backward.

The narcissist has spent a life time of resistance to instruction, correction or criticism leaving them in an emotionally infantile responses to life. A toddler gets angry and has tantrums when they are told no, much like the adult toddler who never learned to receive correction or discipline wisely.

Proverbs 15:18 "18“
":18 A hot-tempered man stirs up strife,
But the slow to anger calms a dispute."

Do we want to be mature and wise seniors or are we content to be children in adult bodies, we get to choose by the way we respond to God's commands and correction from those who walk with God?