The Lord showed me a principle that really answered this matter of who is born again and who is not. Of course we cannot perfectly discern this because everyone is at a different stage in their growth but we can tell much of the time, here it is;
A born again believer does not love their sin. They hate sin, if they fall into it out of weakness they are miserable the entire time because the Holy Spirit convicts them of their sin. And eventually they confess to be cleansed and stop that sin.
1 John 1:9 "9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
The pretenders when confronted with their sin will fight, argue and rage for any attempt at correction from the believer. They refuse to evaluate themselves and will exact revenge on the truth teller for daring to rebuke them.
John 14:15-16 "15 If you love Me, you will keep My commandments. 16 And I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Advocate to be with you forever—…"
1 John 3:8-10 "…8 The one who practices sin is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the very start. This is why the Son of God was revealed, to destroy the works of the devil. 9 Anyone born of God refuses to practice sin, because God’s seed abides in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God. 10 By this the children of God are distinguished from the children of the devil: Anyone who does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is anyone who does not love his brother."
Proverbs 29:9 "When a wise man has a controversy with a foolish man, The foolish man either rages or laughs, and there is no rest."
Proverbs 18:2-3
"2 A fool does not delight in understanding,
But only in revealing his own mind.
3 When a wicked man comes, contempt also comes,
And with dishonor comes scorn."
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