What Does God Think of the Pretense of Love?

Narcissists do not know how to pretend to care or be concerned.

Have you ever been asked how you are doing only to have the response to your answer a sort of grunting sound as though the person does not believe you or thinks you are making too much of your problem?

When we encounter those who wish to have information about us so they can diminish us we are dealing with a narcissist. They don't want to know how you are doing because they care, they don't know how to care, they want to know so they can complain about you.

Narcissists see the problems of others as a bother to them but want the information anyway.

The best way to handle the gaslighting narcissist is to withhold as much information from them as you are able. In these last days of elder abuse, we see more adult children disrespecting their parents to the point that they see their parent's infirmities as an affront to them. Since they do not want to help others they see the illness of others as a personal inconvenience.

Those adult children who don't dare to physically abuse their parents will emotionally withhold love and affection and even needed attention to be able to feign innocence in their abuse. Subtlety is the way of the covert narcissist, discussing things to help resolve them is impossible with those who use covert plausible deniability as a regular tactic.

I have seen adult children who favor one parent over the other showing much concern for their favored parent while dismissing the other parent. They want to hurt the parent they dislike so they show no concern but want to pamper their favored parent to show the unloved parent they are not wanted.

I have also seen parents show favoritism to one child in the family over the others, indulging the one child with much praise while ignoring the other children. This is narcissism at its worst. Often this favored child takes priority over the other parent in the mind of the favored parent and the child can see it acting likewise.

Children can sometimes become jealous over the attention one parent gives the other parent and will work to pit the favored parent against the hated one.

I communicate every day with people of my generation who are encountering all these attacks on the parents of their narcissistic children. Thankfully the aging parents are waking up to the manipulation and learning the ways to deal with it Biblically. They have become so tired of the nonsense that they are happy to let go of these nasty vulgar adult children.

After all, it is far better to be alone with Christ than to be cared for by children who want to harm you or wish you were dead?

Here are the passages that tell us what it is like in these end times. Remember it isn't about you at all, it is the way of the end times happening in the heart of nearly all human beings with rare exceptions.

2 Timothy 3:1-5

Difficult Times Will Come

"3 But realize this, that in the last days difficult times will come.

2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, slanderers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy,

3 unloving, irreconcilable, malicious gossips, without self-control, brutal, haters of good,

4 treacherous, reckless, conceited, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,

5 holding to a form of godliness although they have denied its power; avoid such people as these."

2 Timothy 4:3

"3 For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears;"

You will feel compelled to speak the truth to your children but most likely you will be spurned and rejected for caring enough to spare your children and grandchildren from the sins that ruin them emotionally and Spiritually. They don't want your advice and will punish you for sharing it.

2 Timothy 4:1-2 "I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom;

2 Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all long-suffering and doctrine."

We must keep speaking as led by the Holy Spirit until He tells us to give up on those who will not listen. We must remove ourselves from these people so that our silence in their presence will not be interpreted as an endorsement of their disobedience against God.

All of us can endure anything in the strength of Christ, I know because He said so.

Hebrews 10:35-36

"35 Therefore, do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. 36 For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God, you may receive what was promised."

James 1:12

"12 Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him."

James 1:2-4

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."

Ephesians 6:10-18

The Whole Armor of God

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might.

11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.

12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm.

14 Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness,

15 and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace.

16 In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;

17 and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God,

18 praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints,"

Hallelujah!!! Hang in there loved ones it is almost over!