Never Judge by Outer Appearance

A son or daughter does what their parents expect of them when living with them. We should not be shocked when our children leave home and become seemingly totally different people.

A person dedicated to righteousness from their heart does not change just because they leave home. The change was not a changed heart but only changed behavior commensurate with their heart all along that they were hiding.

When a son or daughter leaves their parents' home and becomes a different person, they are merely allowing their real selves to come into the open.

I have seen many posts of people astonished that when their child left home, through college or marriage, they were associated with the world and the world changed them. The world can only change someone's outer behavior who was already leaning in that direction.

Children say and do what is expected of them when they are living with their parents. The real them emerges when they are no longer under their parents' authority.

There are always clues when our children live at home, but we ignore them, hoping it was just a phase or they would grow out of those little things that seem off. But those were clues about the character inside and what might happen when they get into the world, out from under their parents' eyes and expectations.

Our prayer for our children ought to be that they trust in Christ and He changes their heart. Many people play a role to fit in while their heart is far different from what we can see on the outside. This is why God told us the following passage in Matthew 7.

Matthew 7:21-23 "21 “Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.
22 On that day many will say to me, ‘Lord, Lord, did we not prophesy in your name, and cast out demons in your name, and do many mighty works in your name?’
23 And then will I declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from me, you workers of lawlessness.’"

Never boast about your children to others; we never know for sure what is really inside. The boasting is for our own aggrandisement and not evidence of truth.