2 Timothy 3:1-5
"3 This know also, that in the last days perilous times shall come.
2 For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,
3 Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good,
4 Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God;
5 Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away.
How many of you have encountered what I have among family members? The hardest place to live out our faith is with those who we think should love us, they have a superficial love based on us being whatever they want us to be. As soon as we speak our own mind or the mind of Christ, we are then an enemy to them.
Galatians 4:16
"16 Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?"
The narcissists will preach loving, loving, loving as though we are not that, as they rage at us calling us names. Where is that "loving" they claim to have for others, it is not for us, those who are confidently speaking truth. This superficial love is only for those who agree with them, elevate them and never challenge them to think in terms of Christ and His principles.
I was attacked spiritually and emotionally by my brother at Thanksgiving dinner at his home. We got into a discussion about how we should relate to others. I mentioned that God has many ways through the Holy Spirit in how we should deal with people. That we should be led by the Holy Spirit, I barely got the words out of my mouth when my brother mocked me, laughed at me and shut me down so that I could say no more.
My brother called me all the things he was being, mean spirited, aggressive and other things, while I sat quietly waiting for the tirade to be finished. And, this person is a "Christian"?
This is why I know so much about narcissism, I was raised in a family that showed continual contempt for those who were "too radical" in their Christianity. They all go to church as my parents did when they were alive, but have always been embarrassed at the mention of anything from the Bible. They were great friends with one another but mocked, dismissed and ignored me at every opportunity. This last encounter proved to me that nothing has changed, I pray for them, but must keep my distance. Of what value is it when I can't finish a sentence to explain my views, that are from the Bible? There was clear embarrassment at the mention of particular Bible passages.
When we find ourselves in a situation in which our faith is attacked for the mere speaking of it, we must understand that it is not us being attacked but Christ Who lives in us.
Remember that Christ and the apostles were attacked, and for what? For sharing a way to be saved from sin and hell. This is the same mentality that we encounter in a country where they will not kill you, they will use mocking, raging and intimidation verbally hoping to cause fear in us, to ever speak of it again to them. The attacks are to cause silence, the only acceptable communication in these groups is joking, playing games and affirming those that praise and fawn all over one another.
The principles of the Bible are not important to these people, they love their sin, their disobedience and their sense of superiority, they will never listen and if they don't like what we say they either rage or are completely unresponsive.
May the Lord give us strength to stop responding to the attempts to cause sin in us. The objective is to get us to fight with them so that their contempt for us will be justified in their own minds. I admit I have less tolerance for believers who rage and mock than I do for non-believers who do the same thing. Believers should know better, but in many cases the love of Christ does not dwell in these people, only arrogance and superiority, superficiality and self righteousness dwell deeply in their hearts.
James 4:7
"Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you."
1 Peter 5:8-9
"Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world."
Ephesians 6:11-17
"Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. .."
When we obey the Word, speak it boldly without apology and walk it, be sure we will be a target for pretenders, sometimes even more so than those who confess unbelief.
Why does our culture no longer call sin what it is and label it as mental illness instead?
Answer:
It's hard for people to swallow the idea of sin because they need an "excuse" to sin that make them look like victims instead of sinners.
There is place for a harsh rebuke for a stubborn believer. I have no problem with calling an attitude what it really is. Harsh rebukes are love, love for the offender and love for those who are watching.
The reason the churches are in the mess they are in is because of the unbiblical definition of modern love. It has more to do with good feelings than it does with caring so deeply that we speak urgency to the hearer to snatch them from the pitfalls of their sin.
When someone is marching toward a cliff, we don't stand there calmly hoping we say it just right so they are not offended, rather we shout out to them, grab their arm and pull them back to save their life.
Those who think harshness is always wrong are those who have been a party to the downfall of this culture and the culture within the church. The time for soft language is over, we are now into the warning stage of love, that is to help others see what destroys them and others to save them all.
Titus 1:12-14 "…12 As one of their own prophets has said, “Cretans are always liars, evil beasts, lazy gluttons.” 13 This testimony is true. Therefore rebuke them sternly, so that they will be sound in the faith, 14 and will pay no attention to Jewish myths or to the commands of men who have rejected the truth.…"
It is not love to ignore sin, nor is it love to soften things so completely that the hearer doesn't see a warning, they go away thinking, "wow that person really likes ME." We do not do favors to anyone by withholding truth to get them to like US!
Some of the favorite mantras of those who are stubborn and self righteous are as follows:
"God knows my heart"
"Stop judging me"
"Your self righteous"
Those who are prideful will often call you everything they are to deflect your corrections of the things they do that are not Biblical.
Rather than admitting they need to seek Christ to have His heart, they rail against anyone who will attempt to bring them back to the Bible as the source of all things. These are the times we live in.
If you are one who uses these manipulative tactics to silence truth tellers and blame them, then you must repent. There will be no spiritual growth in someone who cannot confess they were wrong to turn toward the truth.
Galatians 4:16 "16 Have I now become your enemy by telling you the truth?"
The churches are now full of those who have no interest in knowing the heart of God, they only want to feel safe but they have no interest in Christ Himself.
I have had people fight with me because I stated that Santa was a false god.
They have fought with me because I believe we should seek the Holy Spirit for our guidance. Even accusing me of not bothering to think with my own mind when I post "too many Scriptures."
I have even been called "self righteous" by correcting bad doctrine.
The reason for this post is to allow those who are under attack to see that manipulators will attempt to silence those who are on fire for the Lord. They want everyone just to accept whatever they like even if it is offensive to Jesus Christ, and that my friends is in the church!
It isn't those who tell the truth based on Scripture who are divisive. It does cause division because the hearts of many are cold, hard and rebellious against God.
Those who cause division are those who do not use the Bible for their source of wisdom to obey. They are those who rail against the truth, bringing in false doctrine to be able to be friendly with the world.
John 8:32
"And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”
Proverbs 12:19
"Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment."
It has been my experience that most aggressive people are those who defend their error, those who become angry at the mention of God's Word to settle a disagreement.
Ephesians 4:25
"Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another."
2 Timothy 2:15
"Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth."
As believers we are so delighted in the truth of the Bible it is the first thing that comes to mind when we are in a discussion. When we are with believers we ought to be able to express the things of the Bible without someone raging, intimidating and mocking. If this occurs I am convinced we are dealing with someone who has a devil whispering falsehoods into their mind to cause division.
When pleasing people becomes more important than pleasing God, we have a very big clue. When the rager accuses us of being aggressive, while he/she is doing it, we know we have met with a someone who has narcissistic tendencies.
We ought to be able to discuss calmly and even animatedly, without someone blowing up to intimidate and silence others.
I thank the Lord that when we are strong in the Lord, deeply convinced of what we believe, there is no need for all those tricks to intimidate those who disagree with us. When this happens it is time to politely excuse ourselves and move on.
Proverbs 12:22
"Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are his delight."
Hebrews 12:14
"Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord."
How do we maintain peace when others want to fight? The answer is very simple, calmly walk away and avoid the one who likes to fight. If we cannot speak our minds without contention being executed then we know there is no reasoning with someone like this. Their contempt for us clouds their rational thinking toward anything we would say.
1 Peter 2:12
"Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation."
Never allow the fighter to lure you into acting like he/she does, that's what the devil is attempting to accomplish. Praise the Lord we can remain calm, exit graciously and resume our life with others who do not act like that of the narcissist.
"…17 The highway of the upright is to depart from evil; He who watches his way preserves his life. 18 Pride goes before destruction, And a haughty spirit before stumbling. 19 It is better to be humble in spirit with the lowly Than to divide the spoil with the proud.…
God told us to go into the world to preach the gospel, not bring the world into the church.
Mark:16:15
"And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature."
Our worship is for God and believers alone, not for the unsaved who will not worship Him.
