Many people who attend church believe that one does not have to repent to be in heaven. They get this silly idea from those who are teaching that repentance and confession are not necessary to reconcile a relationship. The false things that are taught about human relationships are also translated to one's view of God.
God taught the proper formula for reconciling a relationship through His requirement for the unsaved to repent (change their mind) and confess what they are, a sinner in need of forgiveness and cleansing.
God did not tell us to do differently from what He does.
Colossians 3:13 – "Bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."
Did we notice the words "as the Lord has forgiven you." God will not forgive those who do not repent. He will not forgive a sin if the sinner will not confess to be cleansed.
1 John 1:9 "If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
"IF WE CONFESS our sins" This is a key phrase that most Christians leave out today.
There is a reason God requires this, those who will not confess do not want God's help in cleansing, their pride looms larger than any desire to be changed. They do not want to change, forgiving them does nothing for them or for you.
We are not bitter toward anyone even those who will not confess. It is not bitterness that prevents the forgiveness from being extended, it is stubbornness on the part of the one who refuses to admit their sin.
See how the devil has twisted this doctrine so that most people think forgiveness is automatic and instantaneous even without the conviction of sin. This promotes enabling causing the offender to sink deeper into the mire of entitlement and hate.
The devil knew what he was doing when he taught an entire generation of people to forgive without repentance. Sin has grown, no one asks forgiveness and very few people ever change or grow in holiness.
My guess based on living for 67 years of life, is that most people don't even confront bad behavior anymore, they just let it all roll off and watch the offender sink into the quick sand of evil deeper and deeper without any help.
Yes, I said help. As believers we desire for people to be helped to understand their lost state. Even believers need continual instruction and correction as they move through this evil world being influenced by the false doctrines and the educators of our age who are new age proponents in every respect.
Pay closer attention to what the pagans love and this will tell you their evil and misguided doctrines. Self love and forgiveness no matter, what are the doctrines of the pagans. If these things have infiltrated your church they need to be corrected and extricated.
1 Corinthians 5:12-13 "…12 What business of mine is it to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? 13 God will judge those outside. “Expel the wicked man from among you.”
God said confess to be forgiven this is our model and our marching orders, anything else is false doctrine.
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